I Will Give A Free Copy Of SimCity If Someone Gets Me Laid

[Wiglaf]

I am spending the next two days in Boston WHERE I HAVE NEVER BEEN, and I would like RECOMMENDATIONS OF BARS TO GO TO BY MYSELF. I am not planning on committing any crimes, but I am VESTED interested in getting laid. I also have an extra copy of Simcity with the prima strategy guide (DO NOT ASK) which will not be helpful in this endeavour -- OR WILL IT?

If you direct me to bars that result in my success with my penis, I will SEND MY SIMCITY GOODS TO YOU. Alternatively, if you are Guynemer, you can also get Simcity by SUCKING MY DICK.

Please be hasty. I am staying in the Customs House, just in case I have to resort to prostitutes, they know I'm not a cop. Cops can't afford Customs House.

[DaShi]

You can't go wrong on Beacon Street in Brookline.

[ColdWizard]

If you're trying to get us to do you a favor, you could at least offer us something good.

[The Mad Monk]

Fine.

Bend over.

[Wiglaf]

If you're trying to get us to do you a favor, you could at least offer us something good.

I also have a boxed SE of Heart of the Swarm I never intend to use.

[regexcellent]

Would have had a much better chance on St. Patrick's day.

[Hauldren Collider]

Would have had a much better chance on St. Patrick's day.

QFT. You're a day late.

[Sparrowhawk]

just in case I have to resort to prostitutes

I don't think they will accept Simcity as payment

[Wiglaf]

AN INTRICAKTE GAME OF SIM CITY'S COM[PLEXITRY AND DEPTH WOULD BLOW THEIR WHORE MINDS

[Aeson]

I have mapped out the most likely locations

From the names of the establishments, I'd try the one in Chinatown!

[Tupac Shakur]

Here's the secret to understanding Boston women; they don't actually have favorite bars and will simply try to enter the nearest bar to them until they finally find one that has available room. Consequently, you should look for a bar that's adjacent to some commercial or industrial zones that Boston women are likely to be employed at, along the highest-density avenue you can find. Just keep bouncing from bar to bar as they fill up sequentially and you'll be sure to eventually find a Boston women who's willing to take you back to a place (not her place, as Bostonians also don't have their own homes).

Hope this helps, and good luck.

[Alexander's Horse]

8675309 - ask for Jenny

[MrFun]

[Alexander's Horse]

"young woman found floating in Boston harbour with copy of sim city, pictures at 6"

[Guynemer]

Here's the secret to understanding Boston women; they don't actually have favorite bars and will simply try to enter the nearest bar to them until they finally find one that has available room. Consequently, you should look for a bar that's adjacent to some commercial or industrial zones that Boston women are likely to be employed at, along the highest-density avenue you can find. Just keep bouncing from bar to bar as they fill up sequentially and you'll be sure to eventually find a Boston women who's willing to take you back to a place (not her place, as Bostonians also don't have their own homes).

Hope this helps, and good luck.