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Ok for a change help Thorn --> get over a breakup a year and a half after the fact.

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  • Ok for a change help Thorn --> get over a breakup a year and a half after the fact.

    Without getting into too many details I've only been in 3 serious relationships, 2 of which went on at the same time. Very unfortunately for me the two most serious were the ones at the same time.

    No I wasn't cheating exactly, it was upfront to both not an agreed open relationship, but one that ended up onesided, but then the relationship got stronger and it threatened the other one till finally it hit a point where i had to pick.

    Do i have regrets, yes, do I think i made the right choice, yes. But it doesn't make it feel any easier.

    My heart is one of the slowest things of mine to heal and I really did break it.

    Currently the other person is falling apart basically, still in semi-contact, friendly, but the damage has been done no repair at this point, it breaks my heart to watch though.

    I just can't get over it. How do you'll handle breakups if you truely love the person deeply, or is heartlessness about this the only method of fixing things. I could do that but I tread lightly on that subject per my bad history.

    I miss the old times, the good and the bad, and i wish it could have kept going, but it will never be the same, never could.
    "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

  • #2
    So, my current favourite ex and I lived together 3 times. Over a 22 year period the longest we survived together under the same roof was a little over 3 years. Strange world. We were/are both passionate, stubborn people - made for some amazing times and some other very memorable times, too.

    As long as the ex you mention isn't certifiable (unless you really want to put in a Herculean effort) stay friends, have a few drinks and see what happens.
    There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.

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    • #3
      So, you dumped her but your heart is broken ? You sure you are not a woman ? That or you are one self-centered person.

      Anyway, best thing you can do is get out of her life and let her recover.
      "Ceterum censeo Ben esse expellendum."

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      • #4
        Well i didn't dump her, I freed her of my complicated life, and the dangers i face. I can't get into details but i don't live a safe life, not by choice either, but I have a job i need to do. I also was not able to give her the life we both wanted, so I didn't want to spoil her chance at happiness.

        I'm just having trouble handling it, I miss her so she barely talks to me nowadays, its just a decision i didn't want to make but was necessary.

        So how do I get over regrets of things that are nearly out of my control. I wish i had a different life, its gotten a lot more interesting then I wanted to handle.

        I wanted a simpler boring life with her and possibly kids, instead my life is terribly scary at times and stressful, and waaaaaaaaaaay too interesting. Sucks for me.
        "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

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        • #5
          Lion tamer?
          "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
          "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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          • #6
            Bomb disposal expert?
            "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
            "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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            • #7
              7-11 clerk?
              "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
              "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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              • #8
                I fear things much worse then death on a semi-daily basis.
                "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

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                • #9
                  Do you deliver pizzas or something?

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by gribbler View Post
                    Do you deliver pizzas or something?
                    Reminds me of a story a saw in the news once. A pizza delivery guy was delivering someone pizza, and two man attacked him and strapped a bomb to him and told him to rob a bank in a certain amount of time or BOOM, he tried to but the police tackled him and wouldnt let him get to a lockbox with a key to disarm the bomb, he blew up. Fin. True story too, that sucks.
                    "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Thorn View Post
                      Reminds me of a story a saw in the news once. A pizza delivery guy was delivering someone pizza, and two man attacked him and strapped a bomb to him and told him to rob a bank in a certain amount of time or BOOM, he tried to but the police tackled him and wouldnt let him get to a lockbox with a key to disarm the bomb, he blew up. Fin. True story too, that sucks.
                      They made a documentary about it:
                      Click image for larger version

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                      My guess, most dangerous job in Asheville, NC would be.. union organizer at Wal*mart.
                      There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.

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                      • #12
                        Uncle Sparky wins the thread.

                        Thorn's usually delivers on entertainment but has always lacked credibility.
                        It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                        RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Uncle Sparky View Post
                          They made a documentary about it:
                          Wow must be a BBC one i never saw it.
                          "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Uncle Sparky View Post
                            My guess, most dangerous job in Asheville, NC would be.. union organizer at Wal*mart.
                            You have very strange views about the US. Especially places which have a Democratic US House Representative and Democratic State Representative and are considered to be fairly left-leaning places .
                            “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                            - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui View Post
                              You have very strange views about the US. Especially places which have a Democratic US House Representative and Democratic State Representative and are considered to be fairly left-leaning places .
                              You are blissfully ignorant of Wal*mart's loathing of unions. A few years ago in Quebec, Canada, (a very liberal place) Wal*mart closed a store rather than let the staff certify. Therefore, in a perceived benign place like Asheville, NC, the most dangerous job would be organizing a Wal*mart. Besides, Rah said I Won!
                              There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.

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