Still alive!

[Pekka]

Came back from doctor's office, they said the pictures look the same as last time so no changes. So I'm still fine, after 18 months! arty:

Hoping this ride will last for many more times. Have to tell you though, the doc said the big chiefs (don't know the correct title) who make the big shots, who basically decide who gets what and how the money is used, well they said they don't want me to get scanned until I get physical symptoms. My doc was still pissed off, it felt good my doc was on my side, but at the same time it felt bad that these douchebags can decide whether I get these control check ups or not. And they would not like to have them for me. NOT because things look so good, but because they see it as a waste of money. Fortunately my doc and I disagree a lot.

But ****, I mean what the hell. I guess you get stuff with money. If you don't have money, you're ****ed. Which is ironic, since I'm paying 3 different insurances at the same time due to having my own business. So where's my damn check ups? We are seriously considering moving out to another country, this is not the main reason but won't exactly make the decision more difficult. We're looking at the US, we'll see if I can get some traction going on in there with the business first, then we have to move as a consequence.

All in all the news were still great. Also, the brutal honesty of my doc was good to know. It's good to know they think it's waste of time and nothing should be done, so I know not to trust their asses with these things, to know that it is about money at the end, budgets.

[Pekka]

Also, my doc said, with long experience, expertise and the state of the art knowledge on the issue, that there are things to be done. You just have to catch it early on, and you can try things. They might work, they at least give you a fighting chance, maybe for years to come. And due to that, science can take yet another leap forward and you survive it. So... I'm really glad I don't have some conformist doc who just OK that's what the boss says but more like FU I'm here to treat people.

It's still shocking to hear that you're not worth of x thousand euro scan two times a year. Especially when I pay more than I get, and also when there are tons of **** ups in this country who don't contribute, and yet receive the goods. I mean if some idiot breaks all their bones while in drunken state and just doesn't care anyway, they spend all the money to fix them bones. Give them a daily allowance and food for all the time lost that could have been used for more drunken orgies with drunk **** up friends. Sure, I'm bitter, but **** you too.

[MikeH]

I think this is good news, it means they think it's a waste of time scanning you 'cause there's such a small chance of recurrence.

[Lorizael]

Have to tell you though, the doc said the big chiefs (don't know the correct title) who make the big shots, who basically decide who gets what and how the money is used, well they said they don't want me to get scanned until I get physical symptoms.

"Death panel," I believe, is the correct term.

[Arrian]

Pekka, **** yeah!

Great for you, man.

-Arrian

[Pekka]

I think this is good news, it means they think it's a waste of time scanning you 'cause there's such a small chance of recurrence.

Nope, unfortunately that not what it means. I have brain cancer. Odds are that they come back - always. I mean to this date, who knows what the future holds, I'm trying to eat right, I'm exercizing, I'm meditating, I'm doing all the things I can to not have it back. But that was not their logic unfortunately.

But, still, the news were good!

[MikeH]

In that case, F*CK THEM!

[Pekka]

Yes. But there's a good side to this; I know not to trust them. I know my doc is on my side, looking up for me, but I also know that if something happens to me, I need money to get the alternative options that might not be available. This means that if they say "this is the onyl thing you can do", it is not necessarily true. It might be the only thing they can offer me.

But still, we're only talking MRI scans, twice a year, and that's too much? That's kind of hurtful, it touches something inside. Like they just put a price on you, and the price was so low. And I'm only 30, with a family. I want that price to be higher. I'll pay my way at the end, but I'm still lucky, what if I had some other doctor? This one still got me at least one more scan as we want them. She is not a pushover and is one of the decision makers, she has some power there, but she's alone so... can't bet on that for too long.

I can't describe the relief though, when the doc says "you're fine, nothing has changed!" I haven't quit though, I still believe I'll make it. Sometimes individuals don't get it back even though it is against the odds. I'll try to be that individual, just have to believe and do the right things.

You know... I'm still lucky. In many other countries, I would have already died. And I'm getting this thing cheap, unfortunately it is cheap for the whole process and nothing I can do about it. I realize they don't like doing these decisions, it's a horrible job. But still, screw them for pricing me that low.

edit: Still one thing to say about the case, I mean I'm reaaally lucky, I don't think doctors are supposed to talk like that about their own chief deputy whatever they are called. She was visibly still upset at them. She believes she can be of more help than they think, and she called them idiots and "old timers" who are not up to date with what's happening these days. That's a kind of person you really want on your corner and I have her. So at least I know what's going on and have some control.

[Pekka]

Lorizael, Yeah... can't say it's an easy job for them either. But we're all equal in a drunken fist fight.

[rah]

Always good to here your still kicking strong.

Keep up the good fight.

[dannubis]

Good on you!

[N35t0r]

Pekka

My dad had a tumor cut out of his brain a month ago, so my heart and thoughts are with you

[Pekka]

Pekka

My dad had a tumor cut out of his brain a month ago, so my heart and thoughts are with you

Give your dad my best, hopefully his recovery is fast! For most, it is mostly psychological. To have something cut out of your brain is weird. It is not like a knee surgery, it is taking something out of you, it feels like a percentage of your essence is away, in a hard-to-explain kind of a way.

But I'm fine at the moment. Your dad needs strength.

everyone else: Thanks guys! Hey, you never know, maybe we'll be kicking alive and strong in 2030, world is crazy and this is the best time to get stuff like this. Also wanted to let you know I'm fine. I'm busy with the family and business so don't have much time to post. Letting you also know that I'm serious of looking into opportunities at moving there with my family. We could do it soon but we want to do it right. Don't worry USAians, we'll come hiring few of yous along the way and pay taxes Any of you live in or near San Jose? We're likely to come there if we should come, or near Silicon Valley anyway.

[Cort Haus]

Good luck Pekka

[Cort Haus]

A friend of mine had a brain tumour a few years ago and nearly died. She recovered, got her band back going again and is thriving.

http://www.lilygun.co.uk/