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There Is A Baptist Dog In My Hotel Room

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  • There Is A Baptist Dog In My Hotel Room

    I have just checked into a four star hotel (NO SEMEN ON MY TELEPHONE) and there is a BLACK DOG IN HERE. Needless to say it is only a matter of time before there is semen all over my telephone. Should I report it to the front desk or will they simply put the dog down? I am a huge fan of dogs and would kill anyone who tried to kill her. I have named her Je'Anna because she seems to perk up when I say it and because it makes it seem like I have a couple of ironic black friends.

    And can anyone tell me if diet coke causes cancer? I have been having headaches lately.

  • #2
    Have no fear; the headaches are from your cell phone. Drink up!

    As for the dog, you might call the concierge and innocently inquire about their pets policy.

    Fun fact: There are now more U.S. households with dogs than with children.
    Apolyton's Grim Reaper 2008, 2010 & 2011
    RIP lest we forget... SG (2) and LaFayette -- Civ2 Succession Games Brothers-in-Arms

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    • #3
      You're not RACIST if some of your best friends are black dogs.

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      • #4
        I've stayed in a lot of hotels in my life, some nice and some not so much. Never, has semen on the phone been an issue. Two things concern me.
        A) The fact that you have a point of reference.
        B) That you consider yet another instance of this to be imminent.


        Where does the Baptist reference originate? Did the dog tell you that it's Baptist?
        Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
        "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
        He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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        • #5
          We're seriously thinking about getting a dog. Maybe a Labrador retriever.
          Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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          • #6
            Must it be, or not be, Baptist?

            I've always wanted a Border Collie.
            Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
            "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
            He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

            Comment


            • #7
              I want a big dog (or at least medium sized dog) while the girlfriend keeps pushing for a yappy little dog.
              Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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              • #8
                I hope the dog will be able to train Wiggy well.
                A lot of Republicans are not racist, but a lot of racists are Republican.

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                • #9
                  Yappy little dogs
                  "Ceterum censeo Ben esse expellendum."

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                  • #10
                    Border collies are awesome. One of my clients has one.
                    Loyal, fearless, energetic, fun, and very smart.
                    Apolyton's Grim Reaper 2008, 2010 & 2011
                    RIP lest we forget... SG (2) and LaFayette -- Civ2 Succession Games Brothers-in-Arms

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                    • #11
                      No fan of dogs but I like the golden retrievers most.
                      "Ceterum censeo Ben esse expellendum."

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                      • #12
                        Cats
                        Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                        "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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                        • #13
                          All'aight
                          "Ceterum censeo Ben esse expellendum."

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by SlowwHand View Post
                            Must it be, or not be, Baptist?

                            I've always wanted a Border Collie.
                            Scottish Presbyterian - good choice.
                            There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.

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