Facing betrayal - an idiot or zen?

[Pekka]

I'll be betrayed first thing Monday morning. I know this because I was told so by the person who is betraying me. Betrayal is not a word too strong because that is exactly how I feel; the fruit of my labor will be used by other person who will benefit from it while I get nothing - an arrangement that was not agreed upon by me.

I've been working to set up a new research project for a University, and so I gathered few people to work it. We started with research plan. I'm the only guy with real experience on the topic in terms of being a practitioner and also having published about it. So, we decide I won't bother with the project management thing, after all I'm not even employed at that University. So the young guy takes the role of the PM, he needs the project because he likes the subject and it would be his dissertation at the same time.

Now, we work on the research plan, this guy has no real prior PM experience so I pretty much have to break down few things. He catches up quick and is smart so it's not like I'm holding his hand, just making few adjustments as to how money is given to these types of projects. Most importantly, the ****ing idea, the whole pitch, the bottom line of the project, that differentiates us due to me researching the topic few years ago and having the knowledge of what others have done and failed at doing and what should be done about it, came from my playbook. That's why I wanted to join and set up the project in the first place!!

So now, the project didn't get enough funding to hire 3-4 people. In fact, it pays only 2 people. So, the PM decides, by himself, that it is for himself and for some other dude who I've never even ****ing met and who has not contributed to the project, nor does he even research the subject. Both of these guys don't even have their PhDs. I'm like what the **** happened to my part? I figured this is as much of my project as it is anyone elses, I figure I made most of the contributions to the plan, methods and deliverables - that is the whole blue print. So now these guys are running with the plan while I'm stuck with a finger up my butt. I literally didn't know what to say when the PM called me today. I couldn't believe what he was saying. "Soooo there's this guy X and he gets 10 months of salary from this so.... you're going to sort of not get paid". WHAT?

It's not only unethical, it's borderline criminal if you ask me. I didn't go through hours and hours of work just to not be part of it. I don't think it flies. If I submit and say OK do what you want, I'd be an idiot, right? Just let people do what they want and take the blows all by myself?

Then again, the money really isn't there, so it's not like they can pay me. So this would crush the PMs dissertation, should I become difficult. Then again, what the **** is he doing anyway, why should I pay for the mistakes of some weird thinking? Or is it being Zen like to not intervene?

What should I do? On the other hand, if I become difficult, then no one gets anything. So there's nothing for me in it anyway, except the "satisfaction of knowing that I didn't allow others to enjoy it". Then again, it's pretty much time to get paid for all the free ****ing work I've done for Universities. I'm sick and tired of incompetent momos.

BETRAYAL PART: They will submit the plan to get money, pay themselves a salary, and take my name off of the application, which to a large degree I wrote myself - a fact that even they would not deny.

[notyoueither]

Don't let them do it, Pekka.

Allowing yourself to be ripped off is not Zen, it is being a doormat. You also would not be doing the profession any favours by allowing the PM to advance his career based on a fraud.

[Elok]

Yeah, NYE's response sounds about right. I don't know enough about your office culture to know how you'd fight it. But naturally, I'd start by having a private word with the PM, as politely and calmly as you can, about why you feel this handling of the situation is unfair (the way you describe it, it's not totally clear that he realizes he's doing something wrong--should be obvious, but given that he has no experience with this at all, who knows?). It's good to try and settle things like a gentleman before you start the **** flying. Also, this person who's getting your salary, does he realize what's going on?

That first sentence of the OP made me think a kiss and thirty pieces of silver would be involved...

[Pekka]

Don't let them do it, Pekka.

Allowing yourself to be ripped off is not Zen, it is being a doormat. You also would not be doing the profession any favours by allowing the PM to advance his career based on a fraud.

Exactly! I've been trying the whole Zen thing lately, to be calm about everything and negative things happen, that's the way it is and now forward, if I let it hurt my mind I'm paying a price that is unnecessary. That is, I'm doing the damage to myself, while I could be Zen with it and feel good, live long and prosper.

But this is getting to be ridiculous. On the other hand, I've accepted worse crap while actually working at a University, then again, I swore I'd never let it happen to me, never ever again. And here we are again. I have this saying now "If it's a Uni thing, it's bound to fail". This refers to organizing skills, communication skills and overall competency of running things. This doesn't apply to everyone, but most. And the failures are just on a level that is even difficult to comprehend. Like are you ****ing serious?

I've let the PM know that this is unacceptable in addition to being unethical and highly disappointing. Unacceptable in terms of I will not agree to this even if you are going to do it. It's like being an author to a paper and then the co-author takes the paper, gives it to someone else and they get paid for it. I'm trying not to learn the lesson of doing things for free if you think it might work in the future. I'm trying not to become one of the "so how much will you pay me" as the first question having people. But it seems to me that I should not underestimate the awesome scale of failing outcomes that are possible. It doesn't matter if some of them are unethical or illegal, it just might happen and they'll just call it a day and leave you with a stick to beat yourself over about it.

I say to myself, "I'm not a doormat" but then I feel bad for them! Them being anyone in a similar situation. I wouldn't feel bad if they were just being criminal because of it, but if it's due to incompetency, I just go "OK too bad". I shouldn't do that. But I don't know how to fight back. It's easier with fists, and it's easier with my own business. With my own business I just say no and that's the end of it. Now? I don't know, I'm overwhelmed by the wtf of the situation.

[Pekka]

Yeah, NYE's response sounds about right. I don't know enough about your office culture to know how you'd fight it. But naturally, I'd start by having a private word with the PM, as politely and calmly as you can, about why you feel this handling of the situation is unfair (the way you describe it, it's not totally clear that he realizes he's doing something wrong--should be obvious, but given that he has no experience with this at all, who knows?). It's good to try and settle things like a gentleman before you start the **** flying. Also, this person who's getting your salary, does he realize what's going on?

That first sentence of the OP made me think a kiss and thirty pieces of silver would be involved...

That's the problem, I think he actually might think this is just unfortunate and the way it has to go, when to me it is totally unacceptable and absolutely clear it is unethical and cannot be done, without a question. That's why it's like... what the hell should I do? I mean he just let me know about it, now it's weekend and then Monday, the application goes and boom it's done.

[Elok]

Actually, you know what? If he's gotten anywhere in academia, he damned well ought to know what plagiarism is. Over here, at least, the first thing you sign at the start of every college class is a statement that says "I know what plagiarism is, I will not just copy-paste a ton of stuff from Wikipedia or somewhere and call it my original ideas, and if I do I will get a zero and go to college hell." So this guy's got to either have his head really far up his arse, or simply not care. I'd say your next move should depend on his response, but on reflection he really, really ought to know better.

[Elok]

I don't know about Zen, but in your situation my inclination would be to strive for calm and professionalism, no matter what. It sounds like you're being about as calm and professional as a reasonable person could expect, given the circumstances, so you're pretty good. Just try to stand up for your rights without losing your cool, and if he sticks to his guns simply tell him you'll have a talk with whoever's looking at his dissertation. Colleges don't like scandals.

[DaShi]

I find that revenge always makes me feel better. Especially when the response is greatly disproportionate to the original offense.

Kind of hard to cut me off in a race with two broken legs, isn't that right *****?!

[Meticulous Man]

Take the Hegelian approach

Thesis: I should kick their azzes
Antithesis: I should let it go
Synthesis: Dunno

[Pekka]

Elok, he REALLY ought to know better. It's difficult for me to be calm. I act calmly but inside I'm burning with rage. There's even history why he shouldn't be acting like this: he reached to me if he could join a closed seminar of our research group that was meant for sponsors, and I basically gave him a pass even though I didn't have the power to do it. Afterward, I reached to him saying that do you like this subject, we should set up a project if you really want to do it because no one else is going to do it so we just do it ourselves. So understand my burning sensation of betrayal, as I don't get to participate in my own project now. It's not even about the money. It's about how dare you and not even realize what you're doing.

I talked to a former colleague of mine who is still doing research and knows some of the laws as well. This is, of course, strictly forbidden and not OK but he said it's worse than unethical. If someone comes with a research plan, or even an idea that hey this would be cool and is an integral part of driving that idea forward, they should be included in any case, even if they would be juniors. But I'm pulling seniority as well (which is nuts!). So, the point is, you can't raise money and campaign to potential sponsors that this is the team that will do it, and then only include SOME of the team later on. That's not what the sponsors saw. So even from that POV, it's crooked. Even more so when the content is not solely theirs. It's partially my **** up there, it's my face up there, it's my NAME up there, and then you just take my name and face off 2 days before deadline, with no warning, and no justification?

dashi, I try not to think about that, I might get too obsessed and the aftermath is feeling worse

aivo, Hah, that's actually funny Thanks.

[Elok]

E-MAIL
From: Pekka@supercitizen.fn
To: Clueless@suomiuni.edu.fn
Subject: Bad boy, no biscuit

Hi, I'm putting this in e-mail form because if I spoke to you about this, I would run the serious risk of flipping out. That should give you an idea of how upset I am. What you are doing is not only unethical and inconsiderate, but illegal. You cannot legally exclude my contributions from this project. See the relevant Finnish law at LINKGOESHERE. I don't know what you're going to do about this, and I'm sorry if this upsets your plans, but I'm not going to tolerate being left out in the cold on a project I initiated. I expect your response within twelve hours. If I do not receive a reply by then, I will [crap, I don't know your options, but a threat you're willing to follow through on goes here. Something like "talk to your academic adviser" or something?].

Sincerely,
Pekka

EDIT: Ha, it actually made a link of the addresses! Er, that doesn't happen to be your real address, does it?

[Pekka]

That's a pretty good one, I'll have to wait for his response though to my mail in which I explained that this is unacceptable and that I'm waiting for his explanation/solution ASAP. I told him he could call me any time as well, it's 12.04AM already... I don't think he'll be calling me. I guess I'll be calling him, then.

[Elok]

Just don't flip out and do something you'll regret, is all. It's important to maintain as much control over the situation as possible, even if it's only control over yourself.

[Agent Sox]

Situations like this are why I never work with anyone else. Trust is not a good thing.

[Pekka]

I'm totally covered, at least by definition.

I read what plagiarism is from the Scientific research ethical board (or something like that) POV here in this country. It was very clear about what it is. It even starts with "unauthorized use of research plan, manuscript, article, or other text, or part of a text being presented as their own. Then there is even a step further which could be the case here, which is misappropriation (in my language they actually use the term 'stealing' as separate from plagiarism): "confidential and original research ideas', plans', or observations' unauthorized use, or partial use, in their own name".

Now, plagiarism is a clear one here, misappropriation could be argued, which is more severe as it is purposeful misleading of other researchers, scientific community, funders and decision makers. Which is exactly what would happen here. In either case, it's a definite no go. I still haven't heard from him.
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