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What is this plant?

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  • #1

    What is this plant?

    From Untitled Album


    And how do I make sure it doesn't die?

    My girlfriend was given this thing by a coworker of hers but she has no idea what it is or what to do with it. So she's left it at my apartment because her landlord is kind of insane and probably wouldn't let her keep a plant, or because she's slowly taking over my life. You decide.

    But before you decide that, please tell me what the **** this thing is and how much water it needs and so on.

    Thank you. You may now continue your unmoderated forum posting.
    Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
    "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld
    Tags: None
  • #2
    "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
    "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

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    • #3
      Is it poisonous? Am I going to die? Tell me, doctor!
      Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
      "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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      • #4
        Sorry, just stunned to see you.

        I haven't the faintest idea what the hell that thing is. It looks vaguely phallic; perhaps a trip to the morning erection thread would bring some ideas?
        "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
        "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

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        • #5
          Why can't she just ask the coworker?
          Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
          "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
          He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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          • #6
            Originally posted by SlowwHand View Post
            Why can't she just ask the coworker?
            She did, but then she forgot what it was called. Additionally, she's at work and I'm at home diddling around on the internet.
            Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
            "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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            • #7
              It's a triffid.
              No, I did not steal that from somebody on Something Awful.

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              • #8
                I object to the use of "slowly" in the OP. "Completely" is better. Otherwise, plants are only good for making oxygen and being eaten by food.
                Pool Manager - Lombardi Handicappers League - An NFL Pick 'Em Pool

                https://youtu.be/HLNhPMQnWu4

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                • #9
                  It looks like a pineapple. Or at least like the ones on my parent's back porch, but it's hard to tell due to the crappy resolution around the flower section.
                  It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                  RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                  • #10


                    A pineapple you say?
                    Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                    "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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                    • #11
                      It looks a bit like the flower right before the pinapple starts forming. Each plant only produces a single one and it takes a while. They don't grow one every year.
                      It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                      RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        You stick it up your bumhole.
                        Jon Miller: MikeH speaks the truth
                        Jon Miller: MikeH is a shockingly revolting dolt and a masturbatory urine-reeking sideshow freak whose word is as valuable as an aging cow paddy.
                        We've got both kinds

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                        • #13
                          So much for your sig, after that remark.
                          Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                          "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                          He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                          • #14
                            Maybe not
                            Attached Files
                            It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                            RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                            • #15
                              Come on, we don't have any botanists in the house?
                              Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                              "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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