How often do you UTFSE to find posts/topics including your username?

[Zylka]

Research initiative for publication of the 2011 DSM-IV. Your honesty is greatly appreciated.

WHY IS THE LATE POLL IMPLEMENTATION FUNCTION INTERMITTENTLY FLAWED? WE NEED DATA

[Traianvs]

utfse?

[Felch]

Use the ****ing search engine.

Come on, it's a commonly known acronym. Seen in this list.

http://www.netlingo.com/top50/acronyms-for-parents.php

[Japher]

That list is lame.

[Asher]

Use the ****ing search engine.

Come on, it's a commonly known acronym. Seen in this list.

http://www.netlingo.com/top50/acronyms-for-parents.php

I haven't heard of 95% of those

[Japher]

That's because you're not a parent wondering if you kid is masturbating.

To all you parents out there who are wondering this; a) yes they are masturbating... all the time, and b) what kind of sick parent are you that is wondering such a thing?

[Felch]

They're a joke. I think the reporter got duped.

Sort of like this example.

[Felch]

Personally I only use the search function to find out if that special someone likes me.

I use "Asher <3 Felch," "Asher loves Felch," "Asher Felchgasm OMZGH," and of course, "Asher is down for the Felch" at least three times a day on Google.

[Japher]

Any hits?

[Felch]

None so far. But that doesn't mean that I give up hope.

true lasts forever

[Japher]

Asher is so luck. One day I aim to have a stalker. That's when you know you've made it.

[Felch]

There are good kinds of stalkers and bad kinds. Bad kinds can be identified by their criminal ancestry and penchant for pandas.

[Asher]

In jr high I had a female stalker. She was mentally unstable. Pathological liar in the style of Ben Kenobi.

She would bring random obituary cutouts from the newspaper and tell everyone her boyfriend died, crying her eyes out and looking for attention. She'd tell us how Shania Twain performed at her birthday party (back when Shania was big). She would come to my door randomly a few times a year pretending she was doing some kind of door to door sales/fundraiser but without any actual goods (just papers to sign). Very creepy. She got her friends to take my school-issued day planner and write things like "Stephanie's Birthday" (her name) on days so I'd know, and things like "Ask Stephanie out" in the 'todo' section.

Most creepy and annoying at all...after years of ignoring her I guess she got pissed off while still wanting my attention. So in 9th grade she went to the principal's office and told him that I was stalking her. That I took her bus instead of mine and got off at her stop, etc. And she was all freaked out about it. It's not true, of course, as she's both a woman and a crazy so I was doubly turned off. So in the principal's office I got a long lecture by a douchebag of a principal who believed her, and was told I was lucky I wasn't going to get suspended, etc.

After that, I made her life hell. Well, not really. I did things like take scissors (which were classroom scissors, not hers) she'd put down and used them for my own project. She would then literally bawl that someone stole her scissors (IN 9TH GRADE) and all of her **** friends would swarm on her and console her while she went out into the hall to gather herself.

****ing women. **** them. Crazies.

[OzzyKP]

Now we know why Asher is gay.

[Felch]

Women aren't just crazy. They also have cooties. That's why I'm afraid of talking to them.