In the news...

[Wiglaf]

xoxo

Do you read every post twice, girlfriend? Watch this one carefully over the next 6 hours. It will change a lot, and you don't want to miss it!! :

[Cort Haus]

I am countersuing and firing felony charges on breaking and entering

Bit harsh to fire your charges for following your orders and breaking and entering. :nixon:

[Wiglaf]

You're British, don't pretend to understand Nixon. You wouldn't understand Nixon if he rose from the dead and jizzed on your face.

[Asher]

Bit harsh to fire your charges for following your orders and breaking and entering. :nixon:

I just fired my typist.

[OzzyKP]

It's amazing at how much local press Shadow Hare is getting.

That's awesome.

My girlfriend used to work for the city of Milford. Small world.

[Asher]

I actually own that city.

[Wiglaf]

You add nothing to the site and should be deleted.

[Japher]

I am posting this from Milford, OH

in tights!

[Alinestra Covelia]

"Milford" sounds like a made up name. Like something you'd see in a teen movie.

[Ming]

British airline BMI apologized after real-time maps on flights between London and Tel Aviv, Israel, did not identify Israel, BBC News reported Friday. Israeli officials expressed outrage. BMI said the planes came from a former airline serving many Muslim countries and said the error was a technical oversight

[BlackCat]

This must be in the spirit of the OP

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/5005618/Aroused-elephant-tops-list-of-bizarre-holiday-grievances.html

Aroused elephant tops list of bizarre holiday grievances
Telegraph Travel has compiled a list of the 20 most riduculous complaints received by tour operators.

Concerns about the sand being too white, anger at too many fish being in the sea and feelings of inadequacy after seeing an aroused elephant were among the most bizarre complaints made by British holidaymakers.

Using research by The Association for British Travel Agents (ABTA) and Thomas Cook, Telegraph Travel has today compiled a list of the 20 most ridiculous complaints received by tour operators in recent years.

One envious holidaymaker complained that his friend’s three-bedroom apartment was “clearly bigger” than his one-bedroom place, while others could not hide their frustration that it took them nine hours to fly back to England from Jamaica when it only took the American travellers a mere three hours to get home.

One Briton complained that the £3.50 pair of Ray Ban sunglasses bought from a street vendor, proved to be fake, another that his travel agent had failed to tell him to wear swimming trunks for his trip to a water park, while another tour operator was criticised for not telling a traveller that mosquitos could, in fact, bite.

Among the more jingoistic grievances were that there were too many Spanish people being in Spain and too much curry served in restaurants in India.

A spokeswoman for ABTA said that it had witnessed a rise in complaints in recent years – in 2008 more than 22,000 people made complaints to ABTA-recognised operators, up from 19,552 complaints in 2007.

A spokesman for the Air Transport Users Council, the air passenger watchdog, said that the number of complaints it has received in the first three months of 2009 were up by more than ten per cent on the same period last year.

These 20 stupid quetions are also a bit funny

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/picturegalleries/4973350/20-stupid-questions-asked-by-tourists.html

[Ming]

Were they 48" pizzas?

Hostage released for pizza

An Australian prison guard held hostage for two days was released after a ransom demand for pizzas was met.

Up to 20 inmates at the Risdon Prison in Hobart, Tasmania, seized the guard in a protest over conditions in the maximum security jail.

Initially they made 24 demands to authorities, but eventually gave up their hostage after agreeing to 15 pizzas, Coke and garlic bread instead.

"At midnight, the final sticking point with the inmates was that they were requiring pizzas to be delivered. Our staff member was negotiated out with the delivery of 15 pizzas," Graeme Barber, Tasmania's director of prisons, told The Advocate newspaper.

The guard is recovering from his ordeal at home.

[Ming]

And this one was pretty good too... Love those Germans

Drunk driver rang police

A drunk driver was arrested in Germany after he accidentally rang the police instead of a breakdown service when he had a flat tyre.

Before he realised who he was speaking to, the 31-year-old let it slip that he had no licence and was driving under the influence.

The civil servant, who lost his licence eight years ago, had a blow out in the western town of Monheim while driving a car borrowed from a friend.

He had a blood alcohol level that was seven times the legal limit, and when he tried to call the German equivalent of the AA he became confused and dialled the emergency number for the police.

The drunken man phoned and said: "My car is broken and I need you to come and fix it. You better be quick because I'm really pretty drunk and I don't have a licence so it wouldn't be good if the cops drove past."

A Monheim police spokesman said: "He wanted us to come quickly, so we did."

[Asher]

AA == Alcoholics Anonymous?

[Winston]

Pizzas for hostage.. What a world.