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Ohio man charged with drunken driving on bar stool

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  • #1

    Ohio man charged with drunken driving on bar stool

    The guy is an idiot. Before anyone speaks up for him and says he was only endangering himself, what if a vehicle swerved to avoid him and crashed? What if a vehicle ran over him? You don't think the vehicle occupants would be affected? I can't believe he's pleading not guilty. Further proof that he's an idiot.

    09:55 AM CDT on Tuesday, March 31, 2009

    Associated Press


    NEWARK, Ohio - Authorities in Ohio say a man has been charged with drunken driving after crashing his motorized bar stool.

    Police in Newark, 30 miles east of Columbus, say when they responded to a report of a crash with injuries on March 4, they found a man who had wrecked a bar stool powered by a deconstructed lawn mower.

    Kile Wygle, 28, was hospitalized for minor injuries. Police say he was charged with operating a vehicle while intoxicated after he told an officer at the hospital that he had consumed 15 beers. Wygle told police his motorized bar stool can go up to 38 mph.

    Wygle has pleaded not guilty and has requested a jury trial.

    The Newark (Ohio) Police Department say when they responded to a report of a crash with injuries in early March, they found a man who had wrecked this bar stool powered by a deconstructed lawn mower.
    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
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    He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead
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  • #2
    He could have been a Darwin Award contender. What a shame.
    Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
    "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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    • #3
      Lack of dedication.

      ACK!
      Don't try to confuse the issue with half-truths and gorilla dust!

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      • #4
        NWIH is that street-legal... or sidewalk-legal ...
        <Reverend> IRC is just multiplayer notepad.
        I like your SNOOPY POSTER! - While you Wait quote.

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        • #5
          Newark? Not surprising in the least.
          "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
          "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

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          • #6
            Gotta love the fine citizenry of Newark.

            My peeps
            I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891

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            • #7
              The smoking gun has all the goods...

              Cops Bust Stool Fool
              http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0331091stool1.html
              MARCH 31--In a law enforcement first, Ohio cops this month arrested a man for drunk driving on a motorized bar stool. That's right, a motorized bar stool, which can be seen in a police evidence photo.
              I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891

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              • #8
                Originally posted by DanS View Post
                The smoking gun has all the goods...

                http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...091stool1.html
                Interesting that they also charged him with driving on a suspended license. My "lawyer's reflex" makes me wonder exactly what's covered by the NJ licensing statute(s). I'm fairly sure a motorized vehicle that can go 38 mph would be covered, so it's only a mild curiosity.
                Solomwi is very wise. - Imran Siddiqui

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                • #9
                  I like that his name is 'wygle'. I wonder if he periodically posts on internet forums under a pseudonym which is phonetically similar except for a terminating consonant.
                  <Reverend> IRC is just multiplayer notepad.
                  I like your SNOOPY POSTER! - While you Wait quote.

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                  • #10
                    Newark, Ohio rather than Newark, New Jersey.

                    Very different places. Newark, Ohio is small-town/suburbish USA.
                    I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891

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                    • #11
                      Clearly he needs to add a roll cage.
                      Pool Manager - Lombardi Handicappers League - An NFL Pick 'Em Pool

                      https://youtu.be/HLNhPMQnWu4

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                      • #12
                        Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012

                        When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by DanS View Post
                          Newark, Ohio rather than Newark, New Jersey.

                          Very different places. Newark, Ohio is small-town/suburbish USA.
                          Indeed. Doesn't change my point, since I'd expect roughly similar licensing statutes in both states. Just put the state in without thinking. Good catch.
                          Solomwi is very wise. - Imran Siddiqui

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by SlowwHand View Post
                            The guy is an idiot. Before anyone speaks up for him and says he was only endangering himself, what if a vehicle swerved to avoid him and crashed? What if a vehicle ran over him? You don't think the vehicle occupants would be affected? I can't believe he's pleading not guilty. Further proof that he's an idiot.
                            He's an idiot, but he doesn't sound substantially more dangerous than a drunken pedestrian in the middle of the road.

                            The reason we look down on drunk drivers is because a big car in the hands of a drunk can really hurt people. A barstool with a lawnmower engine is far less likely to cause trouble. We do not punish drunk driving on account of other drivers having to swerve out of the way. That's ridiculous. People swerve out of the way of bad drivers, debris, stupid pedestrians, bike riders, and deer all the damn time.
                            John Brown did nothing wrong.

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                            • #15
                              I wonder how long it will take before these things are being raced on ESPEN 2 at three in the morning?
                              Which side are we on? We're on the side of the demons, Chief. We are evil men in the gardens of paradise, sent by the forces of death to spread devastation and destruction wherever we go. I'm surprised you didn't know that. --Saul Tigh

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