How do you handle Family Conflicts?

[UnOrthOdOx]

It's simple.

I'm the biggest.

I'm also the best trained at hand combat.

I win.


Seriously, we try to keep politics and religion out of the conversations. It's especially "fun" during Christmas as my Sister in law was raised to believe that Santa is, quite literally, Satan. (Her dad (sociology professor) does a lecture on the topic at the local university every year.) And that anyone letting their kids believe in Santa should be corrected.

We have managed to get her to shut the hell up about it since we had kids, though. Mostly by my mom tossing her out a year or two. Fun times.

[Elok]

Originally posted by Ecthy
What was it?

The sort of thing that even I know better than to discuss with strangers online. Sorry

[Dry]

We never had family incidents during the meetings.
Problems may occur before the meeting and what may - and has - happen, is that A says "If B is present, then I won't come" and B says "If A is present, then I won't come".
In the past we cared, but now, we chose one and don't care about the other. If s/he is offended, we just say it was HER/IS conditions, not ours, so S/HE has to face the consequences.

And yes, we chose the one we liked most. Oh, you're offended again... well, try to think about it and maybe... change your behavior?

[Krill]

Originally posted by Lorizael


How serious? One of my uncles stole a house from his brothers (my father included) and we all still talk to him.

Around about that serious; though I'll stand up for myself and by family, whereas you seem to be a *****.

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Krill
Around about that serious; though I'll stand up for myself and by family, whereas you seem to be a *****.

Actually it happened when I was a little kid and I don't particularly care about my family. My father doesn't want to lose his relationship with his brother, but my mother ****ing hates the uncle.

[Krill]

Your fathers a wimp.

[Lorizael]

It could be said. But I'd much prefer if you said it with an apostrophe.

[rah]

I feel quite fortunate. We've had almost zero family conflicts. And those minor issues have stayed minor. I even like my in-laws.

[MikeH]

You don't make them leave the house for a week to cool off, or go back and erase what they said?

[DirtyMartini]

1) Feign obliviousness.
2) Drink heavily.
3) Repeat #2 as necessary.

[rah]

Originally posted by MikeH
You don't make them leave the house for a week to cool off, or go back and erase what they said?

It took me a second but
No.

[Krill]

Originally posted by Lorizael
It could be said. But I'd much prefer if you said it with an apostrophe.

Unlike you I'm alredy wasted having handed in my dissertation.

[Blaupanzer]

In family conflicts, despite all the apparent choices, there are usually only two real choices. First, you can take a side, and suffer all the heavy consequences from one side and the light levels of personal support from the other. Or you can steadfastly take no side in which case everyone will be mad at you but on a much lower scale.

I have never been to an extended family event (mine or anyone else's in any country where buried animosities and communication difficulties weren't lurking in the background making everyone nervous. In my family, I stayed out of those fights concientiously, and I still got dragged in and blamed for things without saying a word. Eventually, we'll outlive all that or it will outlive us. Beats the heck out of having no family.

[Krill]

Whilst that reply requires no answer...I think I ought to say... It's the truth, and the real answer.