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Getting into the holiday spirit...

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  • Getting into the holiday spirit...



    Original URL: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/12...murf_incident/
    Smurf gives Paris Hilton a mouthful
    By Lester Haines
    Published Wednesday 19th December 2007 13:11 GMT

    Paris Hilton allegedly got a bit of a mouthful from a Russian dwarf posing as a Smurf when she attempted to "adopt" a pair of the loveable characters at a Berlin Xmas market.

    According to the Daily Star, the talented heiress may have been a bit the worse for wear when she spotted the diminutive actors painted blue to promote Haribo’s Smurf sweets.

    An eyewitness took up the story: “I don’t know if Paris had been on the mulled wine but when she saw the chaps on the sweet stall, she squealed. We heard her saying: ‘Oh my, real live smurfs. I always wanted one when I was a kid’ before turning to her pal and asking: ‘Can I take them home?’

    Hilton then reportedly added: "I didn’t realise that this is where they came from."

    The source continued: “She then started talking about adding them to her collection and bent down to talk to them in a babyish voice. I really don’t think she was trying to cause offence. But the actors were really narked off about it all. One of them just flipped and starting shouting at Paris."

    The obstreperous Russkie, who "obviously spoke fluent English" then told Ms Hilton "in no uncertain terms" that he was a grown man and she was being "very patronising".

    The eyewitness concluded: “It was a bit chilly and they were frazzled after a long day so not prepared to put up with the kooky American; it was quite a scene.” ®



    Brazilian drug runners shoot at Santa

    By Bonnie Malkin and agencies
    Last Updated: 8:37am GMT 19/12/2007

    Squeezing down a chimney should be the most dangerous feat faced by Father Christmas, but one Santa has faced a far more deadly task this year: negotiating a hail of bullets.

    Drug traffickers in a Rio de Janeiro slum opened fire on a helicopter carrying a man dressed as Santa to a children's party. It is understood they mistook the aircraft for a police helicopter.

    A favela in Rio
    Rio de Janeiro has more than 700 slums

    "They thought it was a police operation and started shooting. Luckily, nobody was hurt," a police official said.

    The helicopter had to return to its base after the attack. Two bullet holes were found in its fuselage.

    Police said the pilot, contracted to take an actor dressed as Santa to the party in the Nova Mare slum, was flying over the neighbouring Vila Joao shantytown when it was fired upon on Sunday.

    Santa later returned to Nova Mare by car to distribute Christmas presents, where more than 1,000 children and parents were waiting for his arrival.
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    The president of the local residents' association said the children were very sad as they had expected Santa to arrive by helicopter.

    Most of Rio's 700-plus slums are controlled by drug traffickers and are not regularly patrolled by police, who instead go into the slums in military-style raids, often using helicopters and armoured vehicles.

    Earlier this year, a police officer was shot and killed as he travelled in a helicopter over one of the city's shanty towns. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.../wsanta119.xml

    Rules are rules...

    Army bomb disposal experts called in to defuse Christmas crackers

    Army bomb disposal experts have been called in to defuse Christmas crackers.

    Hundreds of packages sent from family and friends to soldiers serving abroad have had to be "disabled" because regulations class the snap strip in crackers as an explosive.

    The bizarre rule was uncovered by Major Iain Dalzel-Job, of the Scots Guards Association as he organised to send 650 festive parcels to soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan.

    His plan was for the troops to receive a cracker to pull with their turkey dinner on December 25. He arranged for the packages to be flown out of RAF Brize Norton in Oxfordshire with the British Forces Post Office.

    However, when he was looking in to the list of banned goods he discovered crackers up there on the list.

    The novelty's snap is classified as an explosive-along with the likes of nitro-glycerine, fireworks and blasting caps and cannot be transported on RAF planes.

    This meant Major Job's team packing the presents had to defuse each cracker.

    He said: "It's quite tricky to get them out. It took us two hours to go through them all.

    "The soldiers will just have to go 'bang' themselves when they pull them." A spokesman for the Ministry of Defence, which operates BFPO, said the safety of aircraft and personnel was paramount.

    He added: "Large numbers of Christmas crackers are classified as dangerous air cargo and therefore require special handling."

    There are no such provisions under Civil Aviation Authority rules. Its guidelines state Christmas crackers, which are in their packaging can be safely transported.

    The Scots Guards Association was further frustrated in its plans to send alcohol miniatures to the troops because alcohol is forbidden in Islamic countries.


    Find this story at http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/liv...n_page_id=1770
    ©2007 Associated New Media
    I love being beaten by women - Lorizael

  • #2
    look at these douchebags

    In da butt.
    "Do not worry if others do not understand you. Instead worry if you do not understand others." - Confucius
    THE UNDEFEATED SUPERCITIZEN w:4 t:2 l:1 (DON'T ASK!)
    "God is dead" - Nietzsche. "Nietzsche is dead" - God.

    Comment


    • #3
      I love being beaten by women - Lorizael

      Comment


      • #4
        Jon Miller getting angry at Paris Hilton
        THEY!!111 OMG WTF LOL LET DA NOMADS AND TEH S3D3NTARY PEOPLA BOTH MAEK BITER AXP3REINCES
        AND TEH GRAAT SINS OF THERE [DOCTRINAL] INOVATIONS BQU3ATH3D SMAL
        AND!!1!11!!! LOL JUST IN CAES A DISPUTANT CALS U 2 DISPUT3 ABOUT THEYRE CLAMES
        DO NOT THAN DISPUT3 ON THEM 3XCAPT BY WAY OF AN 3XTARNAL DISPUTA!!!!11!! WTF

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        • #5
          .
          Last edited by ZEE; December 24, 2010, 08:29.
          The Wizard of AAHZ

          Comment


          • #6
            THEY!!111 OMG WTF LOL LET DA NOMADS AND TEH S3D3NTARY PEOPLA BOTH MAEK BITER AXP3REINCES
            AND TEH GRAAT SINS OF THERE [DOCTRINAL] INOVATIONS BQU3ATH3D SMAL
            AND!!1!11!!! LOL JUST IN CAES A DISPUTANT CALS U 2 DISPUT3 ABOUT THEYRE CLAMES
            DO NOT THAN DISPUT3 ON THEM 3XCAPT BY WAY OF AN 3XTARNAL DISPUTA!!!!11!! WTF

            Comment


            • #7
              I hoped this would have been about holiday spirits and almost opened my bottle to join

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by AAHZ

                and LOL at thiz:
                Smurf gives Paris Hilton a mouthful


                i wont tell you what i thought when i first read this...
                I'm down in the gutter with you.

                I read the article to find out if it was tongue or something else.
                "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
                "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by AAHZ
                  and LOL at thiz:
                  Smurf gives Paris Hilton a mouthful


                  i wont tell you what i thought when i first read this...
                  Good, I wasn't the only one.

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                  • #10
                    Paris Hilton = Gargamel?

                    or gargle-mel?
                    Monkey!!!

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Wezil
                      I'm down in the gutter with you.
                      It's a party! Scoot over and pass the Fritos.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I think the news source is in question with quotes such as this:

                        talented heiress
                        guess which part of those 2 words is false.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by AAHZ
                          @ video HAHA

                          and LOL at thiz:
                          Smurf gives Paris Hilton a mouthful


                          i wont tell you what i thought when i first read this...
                          I share something in common with AAHZ

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            SPOKANE, Wash. (AP) - A man dressed as Santa Claus was knocked unconscious by a thrown object that hit his face while he was riding on the back of a truck decorated as a sleigh.

                            Kevin Smith says he never saw what hit him Saturday. Whatever it was, it broke his nose and gave him a concussion and two black eyes.

                            "One second I was up there waving to people, and the next minute I wasn't," Smith said.

                            He was taking part in Santa Run, sponsored by the firefighters union, which features off-duty firefighters who dress up as Santa and ride through residential areas handing out candy to children.

                            Other volunteers realized something was wrong after they hadn't heard from Smith for a few minutes. They stopped the truck and found him lying unconscious.

                            "It pretty much cold-cocked him," fire Lt. Scott Himelspach said.

                            Smith awoke in the back of the sleigh.

                            "They thought I'd spilled my hot chocolate, but then they realized it was blood," Smith said. "The rest of the night was kind of hazy."

                            Smith, a firefighter for eight years, said he hoped to return to work on Christmas Day.

                            Assistant Fire Chief Brian Schaeffer said an assault report was filed with police but that no witnesses have come forward.


                            Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
                            DANBURY -- A 33-year-old woman was charged with fourth-degree sexual assault Saturday after allegedly groping a man playing Santa Claus at the Danbury Fair mall.

                            Sandrama Lamy, 33, of Danbury, is charged with fourth-degree sexual assault, according to Danbury Detective Lt. Thomas Michael.

                            Two messages seeking comment were left on Lamy's answering machine.

                            Details leading up to the alleged fondling are sketchy.

                            "I don't know what the deal was. It was just bizarre," the mall Santa told a reporter, referring all other questions about the incident to Cherry Hill Photo, the company that runs the Danbury Fair mall Santa photo setup.

                            Cherry Hill Photo did not respond to an e-mail seeking comment.

                            According to information provided by the Danbury Police Department, officers were dispatched to the mall Saturday at 8:45 p.m.

                            The mall Santa told police that Lamy touched him inappropriately while sitting on his lap.

                            "The security officer at the mall said Santa Claus has been sexually assaulted," Michael said.

                            Lamy was also charged with breach of peace.

                            "She must have caused a commotion over there," Michael said.

                            Lamy was released on a promise to appear Jan. 3 in Danbury Superior Court.

                            Danbury Fair mall spokeswoman Melissa Eigen called the alleged groping "an isolated incident."

                            "The safety of our guests and employees is a top priority, and we strive to create a safe and enjoyable shopping environment at all our facilities and Danbury Fair specifically,"
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                            Eigen said.

                            2007 has not been a great year for mall Santas.

                            Earlier this month in Missoula, Mont., a mall Santa was assaulted with a pumpkin pie.

                            Meanwhile, a department store Santa in Australia claims he lost his job earlier this month because he said "Ho, ho, ho."

                            His bosses had asked him to say "Hi, hi, hi."

                            "Santa Tim" Connaghan is the president of RealSantas.com and teaches hundreds of people a year how to be Santas.

                            He said the Danbury Fair mall incident, if true, is one of kind.

                            Santas usually have to worry about kids tugging beards and teens throwing pennies from the mall rafters.

                            "I have been doing this 40 years, and I've never heard of charges being lodged either way -- by a guest against a Santa or a Santa against a guest," Connaghan said.

                            It isn't unusual for an adult to sit and pose with a picture with a mall Santa.

                            "I've had some very nice ladies sit on my lap," Connaghan said.

                            A harmless flirtation isn't out of the norm.

                            "Once in a while they'll say 'I hope Mrs. Claus isn't going to be upset.' You have to be discreet and kind and say 'Oh no, she'll be OK. You can sit here, but only for one photo.'"

                            second story reminds me of the chick from Bad Santa.

                            As for the first story, I wonder if I should include the do not reproduce part of the copyright. Will I get sued?

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              talented heiress
                              And precisely what are Paris Hilton's talents (excluding physical attributes, of course )
                              Speaking of Erith:

                              "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

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