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Which beans make you fart the loudest?

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  • #1

    Which beans make you fart the loudest?

    I need to make load farts, but I don't know which bean is best.

    HELP ME!
    APOSTOLNIK BEANIE BERET BICORNE BIRETTA BOATER BONNET BOWLER CAP CAPOTAIN CHADOR COIF CORONET CROWN DO-RAG FEDORA FEZ GALERO HAIRNET HAT HEADSCARF HELMET HENNIN HIJAB HOOD KABUTO KERCHIEF KOLPIK KUFI MITRE MORTARBOARD PERUKE PICKELHAUBE SKULLCAP SOMBRERO SHTREIMEL STAHLHELM STETSON TIARA TOQUE TOUPEE TRICORN TRILBY TURBAN VISOR WIG YARMULKE ZUCCHETTO
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  • #2
    Popcorn gives me worse gas than beans. However, I find navy and butter beans to be exceptionally awful.
    Monkey!!!

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    • #3
      beans don't make me fart consistantly. Which is a disappointment . Actually I rarely get gas from them. I don't like beans that much, and only eat like one type. Bush's baked beans (not associated with our crappy prez). I have no idea what type of bean that is.

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      • #4
        Wikipedia's article discusses possible cures but nothing about which bean creates the most enhancements.

        It also has an article on flatulists, i.e. professional farters, but doesn't reveal their trade secrets.

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        • #5
          flatulists . learn something new every day.

          now where do I sign up for that job? That is my dream job.

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          • #6
            Is it any wonder that Las Vegas is the Entertainment Capital of the World?!

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            • #7
              I thought for sure that Pekka was the author of this thread...

              WTF Perfection?!?
              ( not the same as WTF Pekka?!?)
              ____________________________
              "One day if I do go to heaven, I'm going to do what every San Franciscan does who goes to heaven - I'll look around and say, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco.'" - Herb Caen, 1996
              "If God, as they say, is homophobic, I wouldn't worship that God." - Archbishop Desmond Tutu
              ____________________________

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              • #8
                Harsh on Pekka, IMO.

                This thread has Perfection's Peurile Pant-Popping written all over it.

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                • #9
                  How long are you banned for this time, Perfection?
                  Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                  "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                  He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                  • #10
                    Like Dis, I don't fart much from beans (I just ate a huge pot of beans with onions in pumpkin-seed-oil vinaigrette - delicious!).
                    "The world is too small in Vorarlberg". Austrian ex-vice-chancellor Hubert Gorbach in a letter to Alistar [sic] Darling, looking for a job...
                    "Let me break this down for you, fresh from algebra II. A 95% chance to win 5 times means a (95*5) chance to win = 475% chance to win." Wiglaf, Court jester or hayseed, you judge.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by SlowwHand
                      How long are you banned for this time, Perfection?
                      He doesn't get banned as much on CFC now that he knows to just post his spam threads here.
                      USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!
                      The video may avatar is from

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                      • #12
                        If you don't presoak pinto beans then you'll get loads of gas. The pre soaking helps to get rid of types of sugars our digestive systems can't digest. If we didn't pre soak beans then discard the soak water then those undigestable sugars end up in our intestines were bacteria go to town on them giving off methane gas.

                        Enjoy the bloating and gas pain that comes with it though.
                        Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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                        • #13
                          Argumentum ad flatulum
                          "I work in IT so I'd be buggered without a computer" - Words of wisdom from Provost Harrison
                          "You can be wrong AND jewish" - Wiglaf :love:

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                          • #14
                            Yup, Oerdin has said what is needed .

                            Get the dried beans, soak them and cook them in the soaking water. And most importantly, ENJOY!

                            I'd probably go with black turtle beans. They'll also look nice if the bloating and pain causes you to vomit.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Blake
                              ...I'd probably go with black turtle beans. They'll also look nice if the bloating and pain causes you to vomit.
                              Ahh, I knew this thread would eventually get around to tieing in with Pekka's puke thread.
                              ____________________________
                              "One day if I do go to heaven, I'm going to do what every San Franciscan does who goes to heaven - I'll look around and say, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco.'" - Herb Caen, 1996
                              "If God, as they say, is homophobic, I wouldn't worship that God." - Archbishop Desmond Tutu
                              ____________________________

                              Comment

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