Dads of Polyton, give me an advice to show appreciation

[rah]

Agreed with most of the posters here.
TIME. Spend any time you can with him.
When I visit my father he would pay for everything to encourage us to visit. I'd try to pay for meals and he would figure out a way to bribe the waiter to still charge it to him.
I'd order a limo to pick me up the airport and he'd have called all the services to cancel it and show up there to pick me up.
When I visit I do all the chores that are hard for him. I'll cook a few meals so my mother doesn't have to.

The only way I could pay for anything was taking him to a strip club where he couldn't well use his credit card.

He just likes it when we hang out together since he doesn't know how many more times he'll be alive to do it.

I treasure every minute and he takes extreme pleasure knowing that I do.

Always except their help if offered. It's a gift you can give them.

It sounds like your dad is one of the good ones. Appreciate it.

[Spec]

Wanna feel better?

Let him read this thread.

Spec.

[SlowwHand]

Good thought, Spec.

[Footie Mad]

Originally posted by rah


The only way I could pay for anything was taking him to a strip club where he couldn't well use his credit card.

Wow. I think my head would explode if I had to go to a strip club with my own father, but great for you if you have that kind of close relationship.

[DAVOUT]

Originally posted by East Street Trader
Pekka one of the paradoxes of life is that it is more blessed (and sometimes more difficult) to receive than to give.

Your dad loved helping you.

Be glad for him that he had the chance.

Look for every opportunity to allow him to help you more.

Far from being guilty - take pride in that.

Maybe you will get a chance to help your dad back, maybe you won't (you probably will). But that is in the lap of the Gods and is in no way a duty.

Meanwhile accepting help from your dad is a duty. And you are managing to fulfil it. Be proud.

This is exactly what dads are feeling.

[Robert]

You should invite your father to do something together for a day. Offer him a day to something.
I sometimes take my father to a sauna, we relax, we talk a bit, we read. I don't know what your father likes, but I'm sure there's something, just do something together.

I'm sure he'll love it to spend time with you, and I'm sure that you will love that as well. Fathers and sons doing stuff together is a good combination. It's a day off for you as well!

[Wezil]

What a nice Pekka story. No broken skulls or random violence.

I'll echo the "time" approach.

Also, make sure you tell him how appreciative you are. There's always enough time/money for that. It sounds like you got a good one, let him know.

[Pekka]

Yes time is something I want to do.

I realize he wants to help me and he finds it a good thing rather than something he must do. It's just that I have asked so many things so ... I think that it's really about me thinking that when it's his time to go, I'll be crushed with the feeling of asking a lot but not giving much in return. I know I'm giving by doing well and just generally making him proud but... meh. I guess it's something you would have if you are close but not spend enough time together. And I also feel sorry for the bumps he had to drive through, it's like I get all the good luck and he doesn't so much and I see him getting older by the day and it just reminds me that there will be a day when I'm not able to talk to him or see him or hear his voice, get those advices and expertise on certain issues etc. It's kind of perverse to think that, since he's OK and is in great mental and physical condition. I mean he did perform better than I did with the moving stuff or at least about the same. Everyone is always in awe when they hear his age, he moves like a cat, the hair is still in his head and not changing color so I'm expecting many years ahead, but everytime I read about car crash near his area, I always check out if they get the car model or who was in it. What are the odds? Slim to none. But stuff like that, it just bothers me. I'm very stable but I think I would have to execute 10 cats, 10 cows and 10 dogs if something were to happen to him. He should see his grandkids first.

[Snotty]

father a son

[Pekka]

Yeah. I've been thinking about it lately. Because I've never thought about it. It doesn't seem like a bad idea. It's always a bad time with me anyway, but that's just an excuse to focus on myself and keep this career thing going on. Then again, I'm moving all the time and it's getting to be international soon but it's never going to stop, there's never a perfect time.

NOT that I'd be going for a baby now. I'm not ready. I'm not mature enough. But I realize there comes a time when it just should be done, not wait for the perfect situation. I'm not pushing for it, but let's just say I'm not so much against it anymore. More like... we'll see what happens, if the right woman enters my dungeons of madness and insanity, why the hell not? Lots of people are fathers who are doing the same thing as I'm doing... of course they're always tired and complaining (they do it at work, the complaining part), but ... it's doable. But it'll just happen if it should, I shouldn't make a 6 point plan and manage the resources, do few powerpoints and crunch numbers... I mean that's the type of a person I am but maybe this one can be done with intuition and without too much analysis, yes?

so maybe in few years. We'll see.

Besides all this emotional stuff lately has to do with me moving to a whole new place that is far away from everything and I don't know anyone there. While it's a dream thing, it's also a new start, and it means I have to start all over again, once again, with the social networking. I don't enjoy that part too much. Just today I realized I won't be seeing couple of my buddies for a long time if ever again that I've been hanging around in here. On the positive side, I have many good friends in almost all major cities now in here. I can pretty much comfortably call few people for anything, and it's bound to happen every now and then. So that's definitely cool. Few people I think I'll stay in touch for real too, the kind of people who invites you to their wedding and stuff, so pretty good stuff. Actually I got one coming up next summer .

But it's a combo of new start, uncertainty, new social situations, new job, new apartment, all that stuff, and I'll be going there alone so... it didn't used to be a problem but it seems more difficult every time you do it as you get older. I remember *****ing about this here the last time I moved by the way Turned out excellent. I'll be missing these guys as well.

Life goes on.

[Nugog]

Spend time with him - and let him be somewhat (not too much) involved in your life - he's your father - he does not want to feel left out.

Look for simple easy stuff to do with him - not big flashy stuff - that just reeks of "ooh - look at the effort I have made".

[rah]

Heck, my dad and i take great enjoyment just sitting back and watching a sporting event, live or sacked out on the couch watching at home. Anytime can be quality time. But we do prefer watching things bounce up and down.

[Kidlicious]

Originally posted by Spec
Wanna feel better?

Let him read this thread.

Spec.

QFT :doitnow:

[Kidlicious]

Originally posted by Snotty
father a son

[Robert]

Pekka: so maybe in few years. We'll see.

Worst line I've ever read in this context!
In a movie this line would be "Famous last words"

Do it now, not maybe in a few years, because you may regret it for the rest of your life if you do things maybe in a few years!!!!!!!
Not to mention that you'll say "In a few years" over a few years as well. If you don't do it now, you'll never do it.