Funny Things I see in Bagdad.

[GhengisFarbâ„¢]

I actually posted this in my Terrorist Adventure thread at MZO, but I figured I share it with my Poly Tubbie people too:

Okay, this happened a couple of weeks ago, but I'll share it with you.

We tend to get mortared/rocketed a lot. Now when they do this, they pretty much run out into the open and shoot the suckers from a couple of miles away. They pretty much randomly fall into a general area the size of Manhattan, so its not like their aiming at a specific building or something.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago we were at the MWR on the internet and some rockets started coming in, 3-5 in all. Anyway, we were surfing the internet, its not like we could do something to dodge the suckers, you either get hit by one or not. So one knocks out the window to the room we're surfing the internet on. Everyone stops typing looks around notices noone screaming/bleeding and starts surfing again. About a minute later we realize they took out the internet.

Everyone gets up, loads their weapons and heads out to look for insurgents.



Moral of the story, don't f*** with US soldiers internet.

This actually happened. The rocket/mortar in question, impacted about 300m away on the outside of our perimeter fence (which is a huge concrete wall thingie me bob) and it was pretty much the vibration/air rush from the impact that took out the window (we later picked up the glass pieces and duct taped the window back together).

[Sirotnikov]

Uhm, dude, I missed the whole story on how you got there.


And how's it like generally? What is your task?

How is the relations with local population?

[Zkribbler]

I can't help thinking that people in bleak situations tend to exhibit a well developed, dark sense of humor.

A Soviet man comes home and finds his wife in bed with his best friend. "What are you doing?!?" screams the husband. "They're selling butter at the grocery store!!"

In East Germany, despite all the shortages, we'll always have two-ply toilet paper. Why? Because we have to send a copy of everything we do to Moscow.

I imagine the folks in Iraq have some delightfully sick jokes.

[LordShiva]

How far is Bagdad from Baghdad?

[ZEE]

[Sirotnikov]

I can't help thinking that people in bleak situations tend to exhibit a well developed, dark sense of humor.

this is well known.

there are dosens of nazi era jokes:

Two men meet. "Nice to see you're free again. How was the concentration camp?"

"Great! Breakfast in bed, a choice of coffee or chocolate, and for lunch we got soup, meat and dessert. And we played games in the afternoon before getting coffee and cakes. Then a little snooze and we watched movies after dinner."

The man was astonished: "That's great! I recently spoke to Meyer, who was also locked up there. He told me a different story."

The other man nods gravely and says: "Yes, well that's why they've picked him up again."

"Two Jews are about to be shot. Suddenly the order comes to hang them instead. One says to the other "You see, they're running out of bullets."

[Dr Strangelove]

I understand that the a**holes have developed a crude sort of chemical warfare, blowing up trucks of chlorine gas. I can't understand why we're not getting statements from the Bush white house to the effect: "See! They DO have WMDs!"

[Frozzy]

Chlorine gas is soooo 1915.

[KrazyHorse]

"Two Jews are about to be shot. Suddenly the order comes to hang them instead. One says to the other "You see, they're running out of bullets."

I don't get it.

[Sirotnikov]

The Jews are laughing at fate: "hey, we'll die, but at least the nazis are losing". It is funny both because it is both silly (whhen dying they are grasping at weak evidence the nazis are losing) and in a way - defiant (i know i'm dying but at least the nazis are loosing too).

[KrazyHorse]

I get it now. Seems like a joke you need to get some inflection from in order for it to be funny. Some sort of "ah ha...." type of sound to the punchline.

[Kuciwalker]

@ OP

[Bkeela]

Two men meet. "Nice to see you're free again. How was the concentration camp?"

"Great! Breakfast in bed, a choice of coffee or chocolate, and for lunch we got soup, meat and dessert. And we played games in the afternoon before getting coffee and cakes. Then a little snooze and we watched movies after dinner."

The man was astonished: "That's great! I recently spoke to Meyer, who was also locked up there. He told me a different story."

The other man nods gravely and says: "Yes, well that's why they've picked him up again."

I don't get this one.

[MRT144]

I get both of the nazi era jokes. I particularly like the bullets one.

[Zkribbler]

Originally posted by Bkeela
I don't get this one.

The concentration camp is really a bad place. But, if you say nice things about it once you get out, they let you stay out.