Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Nigeria is ours for the taking!

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Nigeria is ours for the taking!

    This one, received this morning, was rather unusual and funny:

    Dear sir,
    We are serving military officers with the Nigerian Army,here in Nigeria.
    We are contacting you for the purpose of our plans to assist us in the military actions.

    We officers in the Nigerian army have concluded plans to TAKE-OVER the leadership of the Nigerian government,heading by Chief Olusegun Obasanjo(Retired general of the Nigerian Army).

    If you are very conversant with the Nigeria News,history and politics,you will understand that the Nigerian masses are not enjoying the so-called democratic government.
    It is very clear and known that Nigeria is one of the richest oil producing country in the whole world -wide and still,90% of the nigerians are suffering from abject poverty.
    There is no job for the people to do and earn living,no infructructure,no constant power supply,no good road and tap water just to mention but few.

    Nigerian government earned well over $13 billion dollars on daily basis from our black gold (CRUDE OIL)supply to the world and still,the people are suffering.

    As a matter of fact,people are clamouring for the return of the military rule to better the life of every common man on the street of Nigeria as it was during the time of retired General Ibrahim Babangida and Late General Sanni Abacha.The only people in Nigeria today that is not suffering are the people in the so called democratic government and their families, relations whom their daily activities is to siphone billions of dollars to their numerous bank accounts oversea.None of their children are schooling in Nigeria,it is either in the United States or United Kingdom since their is no school in Nigeria Equipped with modern technologies.

    There is no need to tell you that the people in the military and their families are forgotten people,despite the fact that the military are the back-bone/defendant of the Nigerian Nation.We,the military are only remembered during crises and war.

    We have already made some moves and consultations and as a matter of fact we have the support of over 90% of the serving military men for this purpose whom we directly and indirectly approached with these arrangement,even some top government functioneries are no longer happy with the present leadership of Nigeria of today,and they are calling for the return of the military.

    Look at what is happening within twelve months,we have witnessed four plane crash in Nigeria and what is the cause?,political killing.They waste the soul of the innocent citizens simply because they want to kill one of their targets whom they assumed is a treat to their political post.

    WE NEED YOUR SUPPORT because we do not have enough arms and ammunitions needed to carry out these operation hence we are contacting you,as it is not wise making any financial appeal with some of those money bags here in Nigeria,for security reasons and to avoid leakage.

    If there is any way you can assist us either by supplying us with arms and ammunitions or financially, we would really appreciate it.We can assure you that what ever assistance,investment or contribution you make towards seeing the success of these arrangement would be pay back to you a month after we take over the government.
    We are ready to pay you back with what ever interest and conditions you may suggest and ,even if it is by cash payment,bank wire transfer,supplying of CRUDE OIL,or by awarding you contracts.

    The most important thing is that we are going to retain you as our international contact/partner during the tenure for other international business connections and transactions.
    We have already acquired some arms and ammunition for this purpose from Russia which is not enough with the little money we raised and we have built our arms storage in our neighbouring country.

    Very important,we would like to meet with you or your delegate facially for heart to heart discussion and agreement before commencement of any kind of assistance you would render to us.Also,our first meeting would be arranged at any part of the world that is safe,either in Africa, Europe and if you can come to Nigeria before the take off or even during the operations that would be wonderful.

    For security reasons,We did not mention our names and full identities to you,its just in case you are not interested with our proposal and please,even though you are not going to be part of these arrangement please,kindly keep it to your self and remember,we are fighting for the betterment of our children and generations to come.

    Our full identities would be given to you upon our receipt of your positive response.
    We have no other means of contacting you except through this medium(email)and we are very sorry if you do not like these means of communication and advice us on how to contact you on further discussion.

    We thank you for your audience,understanding and co-operations,while looking forward to your urgent response.

    Yours Faithfully,

    (Military officers)Nigerian Army.
    Originally posted by Serb:Please, remind me, how exactly and when exactly, Russia bullied its neighbors?
    Originally posted by Ted Striker:Go Serb !
    Originally posted by Pekka:If it was possible to capture the essentials of Sepultura in a dildo, I'd attach it to a bicycle and ride it up your azzes.

  • #2
    Now that's imaginative
    "I have been reading up on the universe and have come to the conclusion that the universe is a good thing." -- Dissident
    "I never had the need to have a boner." -- Dissident
    "I have never cut off my penis when I was upset over a girl." -- Dis

    Comment


    • #3
      Imagine if this one, one in a GADZILLION, is an honest plea for assistance!

      Naah, maybe not
      Originally posted by Serb:Please, remind me, how exactly and when exactly, Russia bullied its neighbors?
      Originally posted by Ted Striker:Go Serb !
      Originally posted by Pekka:If it was possible to capture the essentials of Sepultura in a dildo, I'd attach it to a bicycle and ride it up your azzes.

      Comment


      • #4
        Maybe you should offer them a couple of modern ATGMs and G-36s, but only if they make you president of Nigeria after the revolution,
        so that you can enact laws that prohibit sending Scam eMails under the penalty of death

        Tamsin (Lost Girl): "I am the Harbinger of Death. I arrive on winds of blessed air. Air that you no longer deserve."
        Tamsin (Lost Girl): "He has fallen in battle and I must take him to the Einherjar in Valhalla"

        Comment


        • #5
          Well, we do have some excess F-117As now, don't we?
          <Reverend> IRC is just multiplayer notepad.
          I like your SNOOPY POSTER! - While you Wait quote.

          Comment


          • #6
            They should have sent me the email.
            "Our words are backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS!"​​

            Comment


            • #7
              Reply to them that you're an ex special forces man who is now a assembling a mercenary crew to go to Nigeria.
              urgh.NSFW

              Comment

              Working...
              X