Maybe I'm taking my job too seriously

[Cort Haus]

Pressure-cooker environments have to be very well paid to be worth it, Pekka. It's a free market and if someone hires me and demands too much I'll say 'no thanks, find someone else to exploit.'

I don't mind a bit of pressure if I'm getting well paid, but if people try to exploit me too much I'll vote with my feet.

Other employment opportunities are available, so stick it as long as you can, then put your achievements on your CV and move on.

[Spiffor]

Originally posted by Pekka
I still want to go back there some day, because I'm sick and twisted like that.

That's your only problem.

You are obviously dealing with ****ers, who have a company worth billions, but who can't spare a few extra employees to alleviate the burden on the regulars. And these ****ers are right: as long as it works, why the hell would they cut on their profits? They're not a ****ing charity.

I have a question: how much is your pay? Is it amazingly higher than what you'd get in a regular job in your field (IIRC, youre computer science, right?).
If not, why would you want to remain in a company that doesn't care one notch about you, and from which you don't draw the profit you deserve?

[Pekka]

This sounds like lots of complaining but I really shouldn't. I appreciate the opportunity. I really do. It's extremely rare for a summer boy.. I mean, damn, I'm responsible for the amount of people most businesses don't even have. I can fire them and I have fired one person and I should fire 2 more. But this brings me to another stress point, it eats you alive when you have to fire people. I agian think, I'm just a summer boy, you know, why am I here firing people. Some people depend on this money and job. Who knows what happens to them after I've fired them. Maybe they are unemployed for a year?! Maybe they have kids, who knows, but they have bills to pay. ANd here I come, you're fired, I'm sorry but you're out, pack your stuff and bye bye.

I keep thinking about it a lot. I know I shouldn't, business is business, but... it's still not something I enjoy doing. I hate it. I really hate it. It's definitely a downside of my job. I'll laugh about it sometimes, but that's because I'm an *******.

[Pekka]

Cort Haus, yeah man, that's what I'm doing. I'm still at Uni so.. you know, getting my medals here.. I can't afford choosing from the best possible summer job and something that pales in comparison. Next summer I'll prolly come back if they choose me (yeah, it's a fight every summer, even for those who've been there before so I need to keep performing till the last day)... but you know it's all for the future.

The pay is not nearly as good as it is supposed to be. But it's only one step from manager position already. Plus, I've worked hard for this. I really did, so I'm completing this bastard. I'm just getting tired already... like 'I could have a heart attack and die'-tired.

But I still make more than my average country men, so I'm 'ahead'. But considering what the job is, it's not nearly good enough.

[Cort Haus]

I could never work in Personnel / HR and make decisions on people's livelihoods. It doesn't sound like the kind of thing you really want to do either, Pekka.

It's always good to see people throwing energy into trying to do things well, but its not so good if its eating them up and allowing others to make a mint off their back.

[Pekka]

"You are obviously dealing with ****ers, who have a company worth billions, but who can't spare a few extra employees to alleviate the burden on the regulars. And these ****ers are right: as long as it works, why the hell would they cut on their profits? They're not a ****ing charity."

You're right. But you know what? They are actually hiring now. So there will be more strength soon, however the help won't come in time for me as my contract is over soon anyway.. So too little too late. We really took a shot in the gut this summer man... I'd say we lacked almost double the strength in our level and position for the whole summer .. you see, everyone is on summer vacation so... that's the way it goes.

edit: and this is another thing .. this is a mistake made by someone. I know, it's a mistake by my managers. It's THEIR job. So who will blame them? No one. But they will blame me for not being able to sometimes handle the work of two people.. like this one day I had to cover in for this other regular as well, so I had like 100+ employees under me. You know how difficult htat is? It's ****ing joke already. Then you still have to go to meetings, fight wars, provide results and know everything that goes on. And then these emplyoees, you know they have things to do as well, thjey have worries, they get sick, they ask questions and stuff. Since I'm their boss, I have a duty to them as well. You know I can't just say go away I don't care? No.. I listen and try to help. And whne you have lots of people, all you have is bunch of special cases and difficult things, person x wants to have a wedding next friday (can you say no you can't go to your own wedding?!), person y wants to come in and work extra in two weeks because they need the money, person y is feeling a bit sick and the doc already left home, person c ask about legal stuff whcih is work related, person m is just totally missing and you don't know where they are etc etc... it's really fun .. however.. that's the life you chose so then you live it. However, it's someones fault, it's the fault of hte manager, what happens when they screw up like this? Nothing. What happens when I screw up in the same magnitude? I'd get fired.

[Pekka]

Spiffor, the pay is little over 2,5k after everything is said and done... which is GREAT for our standards. Considering I'm sti ll a student, it's one of the highest pays I could ever score in here.

Why would I continue doing this? for my resume. For the experience. This will put me in the front row in my peers truly. If my head can take it, or heart for that matter.

[Spiffor]

Originally posted by Pekka
I'm just a summer boy, you know, why am I here firing people.

It's very simple. When the company gets internally criticized for its horrendous HR practices, they can pinpoint it to an individual. It's even easier when said individual isn't here, because he was that evil, unwise, gung-ho summer boy who abused his power as soon as he had some (prepared to be depicted as such as soon as you leave).

You are used as a tool, and you're realizing it.

[Cort Haus]

Originally posted by Pekka
Cort Haus, yeah man, that's what I'm doing. I'm still at Uni so.. you know, getting my medals here..

Maaan, you're an ambitious one. I spent my college summers in warehouses and data entry jobs. In fact my first summer job allowed my to buy, second-hand, the bass and amp I wanted (black Fender Precision & Hiwatt) which I'm still using and are now worth a fortune as vintage gear, so being a humble picker & loader didn't do me any harm. It also gave me a good perspective on the exploitation of the working man, and added a streak of leftism into my libertarian instincts.

[Spiffor]

Originally posted by Pekka
Why would I continue doing this? for my resume. For the experience. This will put me in the front row in my peers truly. If my head can take it, or heart for that matter.

Well, do your five remaining weeks then. And put it on your CV. But don't come back after that.

Or more accurately, consider coming back only after you had other managerial experiences. I take it it's your first job on a managerial level.
Very often, students think they have found the job they'd like to do long-term, after having done an interesting short gig.
By multiplying experiences, you'll see other work environments, and you'll be able to make a more informed choice about what kind of work environment you prefer.

[Cort Haus]

Originally posted by Spiffor

It's very simple. When the company gets internally criticized for its horrendous HR practices, they can pinpoint it to an individual. It's even easier when said individual isn't here, because he was that evil, unwise, gung-ho summer boy who abused his power as soon as he had some (prepared to be depicted as such as soon as you leave).

You are used as a tool, and you're realizing it.

Good point, Spiff. I was wondering why they were using temp labour for that kind of dirty work.

[Spiffor]

However, it's someones fault, it's the fault of hte manager, what happens when they screw up like this? Nothing. What happens when I screw up in the same magnitude? I'd get fired.

You're wrong.

Usually, when a higher-level manager screws up, someone down the ladder is made into a scapegoat. Remember what happened to Oerdin.

[Pekka]

"You are used as a tool, and you're realizing it."

Well.. not really. I do agree with the reasons why the person got fired. I actually did give him few chances to correct his stuff, and it was me who started the whole process all the way completing it. But it still sucked. I just saw no other way anymore. At the end, the decision was easy, but it still sucked.

And the two people I SHOULD fire now, I spoke with them this week and I expect and pray that they correct their ways as well. Fortunately these are all young people and kind of stupid. They don't take this stuff seriously enough as in I'm your boss, this are the rules and you've signed for these rules so you can't break them. And they've done it so many times.. they're lucky I'm such a ***** and don't want to fire anyone. But next week they'll get a warning if nothing goes better and also fired from the next one. Again, I will make the decision, but it won't be fun and I truly hope htey just obey the simple rules of working. Those rules I'm talking about now are not too much to ask for and rather EASY to follow. It's deliberately not obeying that's happening here. But still. It sucks a lot. But I hope the message went through this time.

[Pekka]

Spiffor, and yeah, it would be easier in most places, thjat's for sure. For your body and soul. BUt the fact is, it's the best possible company to work for in this country and it gives you a lot of street cred. And it's the only place you can make money working for someone.

But it's only for the street cred, believe me. I'm NOT staying in that job after I graduate, I need a raise and another position if I will ever work there after I'm done studying. But hey, that was the plan and I set it in motion few years ago so I'm on the right track. And yeah, I don't have my weekends free either and yes I'd like to cry sometimes but life is tough .

The most pain in the ass thing in there is that I have no privacy what so ever. You know.. NONE. So I'm in front of the eyes of many people at all times. So I can't fiddle around either... and fiddlign is important . You know..but I can always take a crap, there I can be alone. But the bathrooms as always full so I can't make lots of weird sounds.

5 weeks though.. just 5 weeks to go. 5 weeks of PAINNNNNNNNN

[Pekka]

And as for the job, it has its perks.. I'm in their list and basically they expect me to come back. For sure it was my biggest reason to join and try to get in there because I want to do my thesis for them. I've calculated my plans, you know maybe back in 2003 or so, that this is waht I do. Now every single thing has happened thus far. The missing link is now doing another rotation next summer and then beginning year after that they would accept my position for thesis worker.. compete my thesis while working there and *BAM* that has been my plan. It's been like 1 out of 10000 I'd complete that plan because it had lots of iffies and maybes but everything worked out so far and I'd say the toughest leaps are already completed. So... of course I have plans after the thesis stuff etc... but if it all goes well, I should be a millionaire before I hit 35. Of course that's a BIG LEAP and unlikely but hey.. I can always dream .

Anyway, I'm checking this plan through, when it starts to go wrong as in I'm not getting into the milestones I set, I'll alter it and get away.