This guy posted his van for sale on EBay and got flooded with idiotic questions - which he posted rather amusing responses to.
My favorites:
My favorites:
Ok for the person who came to test drive it and exclaimed "Oh it's Silver - I don't want a Silver one!" Yes it's Silver. Just so that there is no error here The title says it's Silver, the description confirms this and guess what? When you look at the photo's what do you see? Yup you got it. It is indeed Silver. I am so glad that you came to view it, thanks for brightening my day.
Sorry no swaps or trade-ins - I'm not a garage! Not even a very nice garden shed painted red that I have to dismantle myself, but thanks for the offer.
Yes you can look at it but no you can't take it for a two day test drive. (I am sure April 1st has gone).
How do you place a bid?...sorry if this is too complicated for you I tend to think that driving might just be a stretch too far.
All the seats are present and work, I know that you have counted them in the pictures and can only see 7. There is a very good reason for this...it's a 7 seater.
No it's never been raced ...sorry am I missing something here, Auto Galaxy racing???? May be it'll be be a new class at Imola this year - Auto F1 MPV trials.
How the hell do I know if anyone has ever eaten in it. I assume no four course meals but may be the odd hippo pastie. Get a grip.
The reason Jerry, that the gear stick is a funny shape is because it's an A U T O M A T I C gear box. Which means that if you do come to look you will find that there is no clutch. It's not missing by the way they just don't need three pedals. Should be just perfect for some as it's just like a pedal car - only two pedals.
Again no swaps. What is it with people, when I say no swaps please don't take it as a challange. I have been offfered a caravan, 12 cars, 1 lorry, to have my garden landscaped, some rare fish, and I'm sorry but the very kind gent (Donald) who offered me a weekend with his wife (and him it would appear) I have a special message for you. The pictures you sent me of your wife did not, in all honesty help. Some of them looked more like a traffic accident than something that I might remotely find alluring. I am sure that if you set up your own website (assuming that it's not illegal) there will be plenty of sad sacks (many from ebay land going by this experience) who will indulge your (and your wifes) desires.
Yet again no it's not like new Gavin. Let me put it this way...what would you be like if you have run over 67,000 miles in six years carrying a load of kids (or werewolves)? Got a picture? Good well this car is a miracle. It looks bloody good and far far better than you would after such an event. However new implies without a mark, pristine, no wear...no it's not like new. It's good and it doesn't appear to have been abused like I sense you should be....may be I should introduce you to Donald (see above).
Yes it runs on petrol, I am tempted to say I've tried gin and tonics but someone will actually think I mean it. I now understand why car adverts have to include warnings like 'Does not include people and scenery' in them. How do such people get by in life? Do they buy a ticket for the train and think they have a share in the rolling stock??
Sorry no swaps or trade-ins - I'm not a garage! Not even a very nice garden shed painted red that I have to dismantle myself, but thanks for the offer.
Yes you can look at it but no you can't take it for a two day test drive. (I am sure April 1st has gone).
How do you place a bid?...sorry if this is too complicated for you I tend to think that driving might just be a stretch too far.
All the seats are present and work, I know that you have counted them in the pictures and can only see 7. There is a very good reason for this...it's a 7 seater.
No it's never been raced ...sorry am I missing something here, Auto Galaxy racing???? May be it'll be be a new class at Imola this year - Auto F1 MPV trials.
How the hell do I know if anyone has ever eaten in it. I assume no four course meals but may be the odd hippo pastie. Get a grip.
The reason Jerry, that the gear stick is a funny shape is because it's an A U T O M A T I C gear box. Which means that if you do come to look you will find that there is no clutch. It's not missing by the way they just don't need three pedals. Should be just perfect for some as it's just like a pedal car - only two pedals.
Again no swaps. What is it with people, when I say no swaps please don't take it as a challange. I have been offfered a caravan, 12 cars, 1 lorry, to have my garden landscaped, some rare fish, and I'm sorry but the very kind gent (Donald) who offered me a weekend with his wife (and him it would appear) I have a special message for you. The pictures you sent me of your wife did not, in all honesty help. Some of them looked more like a traffic accident than something that I might remotely find alluring. I am sure that if you set up your own website (assuming that it's not illegal) there will be plenty of sad sacks (many from ebay land going by this experience) who will indulge your (and your wifes) desires.
Yet again no it's not like new Gavin. Let me put it this way...what would you be like if you have run over 67,000 miles in six years carrying a load of kids (or werewolves)? Got a picture? Good well this car is a miracle. It looks bloody good and far far better than you would after such an event. However new implies without a mark, pristine, no wear...no it's not like new. It's good and it doesn't appear to have been abused like I sense you should be....may be I should introduce you to Donald (see above).
Yes it runs on petrol, I am tempted to say I've tried gin and tonics but someone will actually think I mean it. I now understand why car adverts have to include warnings like 'Does not include people and scenery' in them. How do such people get by in life? Do they buy a ticket for the train and think they have a share in the rolling stock??
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