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Doctors find 12 nails in head of man reporting headache

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  • #1

    Doctors find 12 nails in head of man reporting headache

    In a kind of fitting summary, what a ****forbrains.

    PORTLAND, Ore. - An Oregon man who went to a hospital complaining of a headache was found to have 12 nails embedded in his skull from a suicide attempt with a nail gun, doctors say.

    Surgeons removed the nails with needle-nosed pliers and a drill, and the man survived with no serious lasting effects, according to a report in the current issue of the Journal of Neurosurgery. The unidentified 33-year-old man was suicidal and high on methamphetamine last year when he fired the nails - up to 2 inches in length - into his head one by one.

    No one before is known to have survived after intentionally firing so many foreign objects into the head, according to the report.
    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
    "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
    He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead
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  • #2
    "I've just fired 12 nails into my head with a nailgun"

    "In unrelated news, I have a headache"
    "I work in IT so I'd be buggered without a computer" - Words of wisdom from Provost Harrison
    "You can be wrong AND jewish" - Wiglaf :love:

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    • #3
      Those nailguns look cool
      Speaking of Erith:

      "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

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      • #4
        He's smarter now, is he? He'll put it back eventually...
        Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing?
        Then why call him God? - Epicurus

        Comment

        • #5
          At least he has a bit of ventilation to his brain now
          Speaking of Erith:

          "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

          Comment

          • #6
            Link?
            DISCLAIMER: the author of the above written texts does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for any offence and insult; disrespect, arrogance and related forms of demeaning behaviour; discrimination based on race, gender, age, income class, body mass, living area, political voting-record, football fan-ship and musical preference; insensitivity towards material, emotional or spiritual distress; and attempted emotional or financial black-mailing, skirt-chasing or death-threats perceived by the reader of the said written texts.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Whaleboy
              "I've just fired 12 nails into my head with a nailgun"

              "In unrelated news, I have a headache"
              Certainly nailed that prognosis.
              One day Canada will rule the world, and then we'll all be sorry.

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              • #8
                Oh crap, I see the spirit of Richard Whiteley is strong in this one
                Speaking of Erith:

                "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Colonâ„¢
                  Link?
                  Link

                  ACK!
                  Don't try to confuse the issue with half-truths and gorilla dust!

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Dauphin


                    Certainly nailed that prognosis.
                    You can knock that on the head.

                    (Damn, that works on so many levels )
                    Speaking of Erith:

                    "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      His was better though.
                      Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing?
                      Then why call him God? - Epicurus

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        There's no need to hammer the point home...
                        Speaking of Erith:

                        "It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda Smith

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Yeah, the doctor hit the nail on the head there.

                          CSPA

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                          • #14
                            grrr to bad puns.

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