The Co-Habitation thread.

[TCO]

Give it a shot. You don't want to end up old and single and bitter like me.

[TCO]

what coT said.

[chequita guevara]

Bunnygrrl more or less moved in about a month after we started sleeping together (Jan 1991--we didn't start dating until sometime after that), though not officially, and she would go home for a day or two every week or so. We offiially moved in together after about seven months, then got into a huge fight with our roommates and moved out, but having no place else to go, moved back in without our respective mothers one year after we started our relationship. In Nov'. 93, we moved in together for several years, but in '95 I told her she had to get her own place, because I wanted her to take care of herself for a while, instead of relying on me for everything, but she was back within a couple months, and we've lived together ever since.

As for you, Oerdin, I would strongly advise against it. When you let someone move in with you, you make a contract to let them live there. If things went' badly, you could conceivably be forced to allow her to remain in your house while you tried to evict her in the courts. California is the home of "palimony." I didn't own squat, so I could afford to let someone shack up with me. You gotta house. Don't do it unless you're sure.

[Agathon]

but in '95 I told her she had to get her own place, because I wanted her to take care of herself for a while, instead of relying on me for everything

You heartless bastard!!! It's just a measure of her decency that she didn't dump your sad ass.

[self biased]

i've had ups and downs with this. i do agree that nine weeks is too early, but i've had someone move in with me at less than that. things would likely have worked out had it not been for other circumstances.

[TCO]

Originally posted by Agathon

but in '95 I told her she had to get her own place, because I wanted her to take care of herself for a while, instead of relying on me for everything

You heartless bastard!!! It's just a measure of her decency that she didn't dump your sad ass.

Is that a chick or a guy?

[TCO]

Originally posted by self biased
i've had ups and downs with this. i do agree that nine weeks is too early, but i've had someone move in with me at less than that. things would likely have worked out had it not been for other circumstances.

Stop typing in italics. It's annoying.

[alva]

Too early dude, I'd say at least six months. Why not go away for a couple of days and see how that pans out.

[child of Thor]

"Look if you really loved me you'd go get your own place, then i could come and sponge of you for abit, and no constant free sex isn't enough. pack your bags and come back when you've made something of yourself" - Che to bunnygirl(alleged)

[alva]

Originally posted by TCO


Stop typing in italics. It's annoying.

Why, nothing wrong with it

[self biased]

Originally posted by TCO


Stop typing in italics. It's annoying.

stop whining about it. it's equally annoying.

[OzzyKP]

I dunno, its a toss up. I'm contemplating the same thing now, sorta, but its only been like a month, and we aren't seriously considering living together yet, but I am lobbying hard to get her to move to my area. I think if we did live together it would work, but I'm put off by the very idea of it so soon.

We've both ruled out the idea of living together yet, but I think we both kinda figure if she was closer we'd be practically living together anyhow.

I am amazed though at the people here who shacked up almost immediately and then had it last for years. I think that provides some good evidense to support what I (and possibly Oerdin) am thinking right now, that sometimes you just know.

As a rational person, I worry just like Oerdin is, that thinking about living together or marriage or anything so soon is crazy. But if everything feels right, and you are in love, and its a person you just click with and feel you could spend your life together with, then.... maybe taking the chance is worth it. Rationality be damned.

[child of Thor]

Living together isnt the same as being married, its not as heavy as all that.

But from what some people have said here in cautionary terms does make we wonder if you have a different law in the usa to the uk for this?

The house is Oerdins right, so there shouldn't be any danger say if in 6months time its not working out and he asks her to leave?(thats how it is in the uk). Unless she gets him to sign the house over to both there names everything should be fine if it doesn't work out?

But then i know you have this huge litegation thing in america, so maybe there are legal issues i'm not aware of. If so my advice would change accordingly.

[chequita guevara]

Originally posted by child of Thor
The house is Oerdins right, so there shouldn't be any danger say if in 6months time its not working out and he asks her to leave?(thats how it is in the uk).

Did you read my post? This is exactly why he shouldn't have her move in until he's sure, cuz once she's in, she'll be almost impossible to kick out. In addiction, he could conceivably find himself paying for her to stay someplace else once he's successfully evicted her.

[TCO]

Why not just drive to Vegas and get married?