Hi, I am new, I hope you'll prove yourself useful by evaluating this science paper.

[Az]

Yeah, I am back.



Need your help, guys. I've written this paper about a project I've done. I want you to review it for english, and proper scientific annotation.

It is attached.

[Az]

keepin' it on top. and real.

[Whoha]

1st helpful tip: remove "jack****" from your paper.

[Solver]

Wow, I'd help there with the writing perhaps, but it's all chemistry... I can barely uderstand it, and then not all, I have no chemical education...

[Asmodean]

Whoops. Even with my A-level chemistry from high-school, I wouldn't know where to begin.

Asmodean

[Starchild]

Though the exact mechanisms are a bit beyond me currently, I can see the general outline of what you're doing and how it's happening.

The English is fine in it. However, unless I'm mistaken, the abbreviation for grams is (g) not (gr), which you might want to change. My chem tutors like to see molar quantities listed as well but that may just be them.

Watch the "voice" you use in the paper. It's been drilled into me that the third person passive is the way to write papers. No using "I" or "we" or that. In some parts you describe the process as "really rather easy" or a "rather strong vacuum". It makes it seem a bit informal. "Rather" is a perfect word for a conversation taking place over a coffee but in scientific papers, I'd stay away from it.

[Az]

Guys, this isn't a chemistry question! ( although I could use some help with that reduction in the last stage )

1st helpful tip: remove "jack****" from your paper.

Starchild:

Though the exact mechanisms are a bit beyond me currently, I can see the general outline of what you're doing and how it's happening.

the stuff is quite hot in organometallic synthesis, I've been told, actually. In any case, this isn't really important to me ( at this point )

The English is fine in it. However, unless I'm mistaken, the abbreviation for grams is (g) not (gr), which you might want to change.

you're correct, but I've seen both, and I am used to the latter.... I'll fix it, anyway.

My chem tutors like to see molar quantities listed as well but that may just be them.

I've actually done quite a bit of an effort to post exactly the volumes of liquids and weights of solids in the experimental section. also, as you can see, I've pointed out the molar quantities for the principal reactants, as well.

Watch the "voice" you use in the paper. It's been drilled into me that the third person passive is the way to write papers. No using "I" or "we" or that. In some parts you describe the process as "really rather easy" or a "rather strong vacuum". It makes it seem a bit informal. "Rather" is a perfect word for a conversation taking place over a coffee but in scientific papers, I'd stay away from it.

That's true, but it's kind of hard for me to see how could I carry a (fake) discussion of the experimental results without being at least slightly informal about it. Generally, I do try to not use "we" or "I", so you're correct about that.

[Jaguar]

(g) is definitely the right one to use. I've never seen (gr).

[Solver]

But you can do the discussion using forms like "It can be seen that...", "... at which point it can be observed that", "it can be argued that", etc.

EDIT: And definitely use (g). I've never seen (gr), and (g) is the SI way to write it anyhow.

[Az]

gah, I guess you're right.... well, anyway, this was only a prelude to the short lecture I have to make on monday about this. ( including..... slides! )

[Solver]

Slides .

You know, I'm weird, but the way I prefer to hear other people give lectures is so that it doesn't seem as if the lecture has been learnt by heart or prepared too much. I like it when there's something spontaneous, or at least a general feeling of the speaker being comfortable and being able to improvise. But that's just me .

[Az]

I am not making any notes whatsoever. I'll simply read from the slides.
(note to self: must prepare the actual slides )

[BlackCat]

In "Results" it should be "... used to collect..." instead of 'used to colected"

You have a "the the" in Suppl 1B

Picky, picky, I know

[Az]

Hey, thanks!

( I sat throughout the night writing this. )

[mrmitchell]

You know, I'm weird, but the way I prefer to hear other people give lectures is so that it doesn't seem as if the lecture has been learnt by heart or prepared too much. I like it when there's something spontaneous, or at least a general feeling of the speaker being comfortable and being able to improvise. But that's just me .

I think everyone prefers it that way: the speaker knows his subject matter by heart, not his speech.