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Some kid wrote this for the Mercury, I thought it was funny. He definitly knows the tell-tale signs of being a loser loner... Winners don't have Dragonball Z action figures, they have YuGiOh!!
Top 10 ways to pass time when you're a loner on Valentine's Day
1. Use your emotional instability to stay awake crying every night the week before, and then sleep through Valentine's Day.
2. Brush your teeth. A lot.
3. Reorganize your ``Dragon Ball Z'' action figures.
4. Make friends with lonely telemarketers and don't let them hang up.
5. Spend the holiday in the hospital after eating the berries off the prickly tree in your front yard.
6. Bathe in cologne and wait for a swarm of angry insects to be attracted to you.
7. Eat 30 bowls of Cocoa Puffs and proceed to clean every corner of your house really, really fast.
8. Pretend it's Halloween, dress up like Michael Jackson and ponder why people aren't talking to you.
9. Re-watch your ``Buffy the Vampire Slayer'' DVDs and go out hunting for vampires on Lookout Point.
10. Camouflage yourself as a wall and wait.
1. Use your emotional instability to stay awake crying every night the week before, and then sleep through Valentine's Day.
2. Brush your teeth. A lot.
3. Reorganize your ``Dragon Ball Z'' action figures.
4. Make friends with lonely telemarketers and don't let them hang up.
5. Spend the holiday in the hospital after eating the berries off the prickly tree in your front yard.
6. Bathe in cologne and wait for a swarm of angry insects to be attracted to you.
7. Eat 30 bowls of Cocoa Puffs and proceed to clean every corner of your house really, really fast.
8. Pretend it's Halloween, dress up like Michael Jackson and ponder why people aren't talking to you.
9. Re-watch your ``Buffy the Vampire Slayer'' DVDs and go out hunting for vampires on Lookout Point.
10. Camouflage yourself as a wall and wait.
...I'll probably be doing number 7
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