SNESA - SKILORDS Never Ending Stories Apolyton

[Tarquinius]

Polish Commander,

I advise you to make your defenses ready in order to stand a chance against the coming German retaliation. However, you can still avoid a disaster for your country by returning our women and by paying us 1000 gold per day. If you don't do that, we will attack your country 4 days from now,

Chancellor Wilhelm II

[Samuel Johnson]

Uday Hussein was the chief of the secret police, the only one allowed to carry a gun in Saddam's prescence. He laughed as he watched CNN - his plans to initiate propaganda on NATO cities was working, incredibly enough. His target was Berlin and Washington and the recent demarches from the Germans indicated they had no love lost for NATO. He called up Saddam.

"Hey Daddy."

"Camel? Oh, it's you, Uday. I forgot - you're the one who talks like a girl."

"Listen, Daddy." Uday contained his anger. "Why don't we offer some secret assistance to the Germans against Poland. Perhaps, one of our spies can try to steal some of their technologies while the Mack is busy screwing one of his wenches?"

Saddam: "Let me think about it, Sonny boy. I always like the Polish sausages and they have promised to trade us secrets on the submarine. It would be a shame to blow it if your spy gets exposed. Besides, I would have to publically behead you and rape your wife and children. Let's sit this one out and wait to see what NATO and the Warsaw pact react. Also, I would have to consult the other members of the Jihad Bandy thingie. Have you tried some of the new Thai stick. It's awesome. you really do need to chill out, you know, son..."

Uday hung up the phone. "Stupid doper. Perhaps it was time to get in touch with Camel. He's insane but he always has some evil plan."

Saddam hung up his phone. "Stupid kid," he said to Halie as he took the joint from his hand, "ugly, too, but then you should have seen his mother. Hoofah!" Halie laughed.

[SKILORD]

Remember! only 3 posts aday! i don't know if this has been broken yet but if it gets broken the results are chaos beyond the control of anyone here!

[Samuel Johnson]

oops. i think i certainly went over three posts. Saddam sorry, chaos middle name.

[Rotten999]

"You never told me how your trip to Poland went." Aronovich glowered at Beria.

"Let's just say that it was less than inspiring, and leave it at that."

"Now Poland is facing war with Germany over stolen women."

"Now THAT'S a strategic resource." The smile faded from Aronovich's face. "Tell our German friends that any interference with Polish independence will result in a state of war with the USSR and her allies."

"Done. What of your plans for Persia?"

"Those middle easterners are starting to concern me...I oppose direct invovlment, but perhaps you can get some NKVD men to infilitrate this "Jihad." Perhaps pull out some weeds." Aronovich snuffed out his cigarette.

"Right. And the Marxists within India?" Beria's eyes narrowed.

"Send support, but not too much. Some weapons, perhaps some "advisors" and "observers"..." Beria nodded.

"Looks like my spies have some work to do." Now a smile crept over Beria's face.

[Metaliturtle]

Wilhelm, Cork yo poo hole

Saddam, dope up the Germans, see what I care, you have nothing that I want for my new sub plans.

All: I have a small fleet now purchased from an independent contractor in Canada, Thanks Canada!! Blocade of all German ports to limit German trade to slow overland routes.

Polish ground forces strengthen fortifications on the border, WE WILL NOT BE RAPED BY THE GERMAN SCUM A SECOND TIME.

Here's a mooning for you Wilhelm (____@____) Look at that big fat arse just wagging at you.

Final transmission from Mack the Pollack for this year.

P.S. USSR RULES HARDCORE

[Metaliturtle]

How fitting that an invasion of poland could start ANOTHER world war!

[SKILORD]

Originally posted by Metaliturtle
How fitting that an invasion of poland could start ANOTHER world war!

Indeed, although im WW2 it wasn't over imaginary women. lol

[Metaliturtle]

This is the historical slogan for this war:

War of Women: we knew they'd screw us one way or another

Isn't it great??

[Tarquinius]

"Call for our military advisor", Chancellor Wilhelm II of Germany said to one of his servants. A few minutes later the advisor entered the room.
"Do we have an agreement with our allies?" Wilhelm asked.
"Yes, we have Herr Wilhelm. The French and Italians have promised to help us with tank divisions if needed. A large part of the British fleet will move to our blocked harbours and will open fire together with our own ships on the Polish fleet."
"Great! Send a message to the Poland and the USSR that if Poland doesn't move its fleet out, we will destroy that fleet and we will begin our attack on Poland"
"I will, Herr Chancellor. Anything else?"
"Yes, has the foreign Minister returned from his flight to Iraq yet?"
"Yes he has, he is on his way to us now"
"Splendid. In the meanwhile, did you also discuss the Aztec situation with NATO?"
"Yes we have discussed it. The European countries will stay out of it, because of the war that might start soon except for Denmark, because it wasn't present at the meeting. I don't know about them."
"Well, they aren't important anyway. They probably will help us in the war, as some of their harbours are blocked as well. These Polish dogs are too stupid to do anything right aren't they "
"They certainly are!. But the message that only the Americans and maybe the Danish will interfere in the Aztec situation has been sent to all of the Aztec governments"

"Ah, good evening my foreign minister! How was your trip in Iraq?"
"It was a very nice trip, Herr Chancellor. Saddam was very nice to me. He seems to have wicked plans against the USSR. He really really wants nukes"
"Ah, is that so? Well, did you ask him what he would give you for that?"
"Yes, I did but he said he wanted to discuss that with you, the chancellor."
"Allright, send him a message that I am willing to give him a nuke for three years of spice and oil supplies"
"Yes, that seems fair. But aren't you afraid he will use it against us, or the NATO?"
"Well, he promised not to use it against us, so I will trust him. He will get nukes eventually though, so why shouldn't we make profit from it?"
"You are absolutely right, Herr Chancellor. I immediately send a message to Saddam"
"Good, then we are done here. I will see you again later this week, when we will consult about the Polish situation again"

[civman2000]

When news of NATO's rejection of his plan, Guy Ana knew he was doomed. His last hope was to send nearly the entire army to the crucial city of Bogota, which the BLueb forces were quickly approaching....

THE BATTLE OF BOGOTA:

Defending: 400,000 Guyanan infantry, 10,000 cavalry.

Attacking: 200 American-made tanks, 100,000 Bluebish infantry, 30 American-made bombers, 50,000 Bluebish cavalry, 30,000 American infantry, 4,000 American cavalry, 100 American-made haevy artillery, 300 Bluebish light artillery.

THe battle opened up with massive bombings and artillery bombardment, greatly weakening the Guyanan forces. THe tanks then charged, doing even more damage but the majority retreating. The Guyanan cavalry counterattacked, and were torn to bits by the infantry on the other side. A massive Bluebish-American charge followed, decimating the Guyanan forces. The bombers, having refueled, came back for another wave. In the end, 180,000 Guyanans were taken prisoner because they ran out of ammuntion. THe GUyanan army was absolutely crushed. Within a few days, a huge mass of Bluebish and American forces stormed Georgetown. THe Great Aztec Civil War has finally ended, with the loyalists winning!

[civman2000]

3 posts per day??? Why didnt you say so earlier???

The Civs/Alliances:

NATO:
In conflict but not at war with Warsaw pact.

America:
Large Army
Small Navy
Large Airforce
Some Nukes
Govt: Democracy
Ruler: Dubya (civman2000)
Tech Level: Early Modern

Denmark:
Small Army
Medium Navy
Small Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler: Prime Minister Uffe Sjursen (Toasty)
Tech: Early Modern

Italy:
Medium Army
No Navy
Medium Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler: Mario Corleoni (Commander Steve)
Tech Level: Early Modern

France:
Small Army
Medium Navy
Medium Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler:?
Tech: Early Modern

Germany:
Large Army
No Navy
Medium Airforce
Few Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler:Tarquinius
Tech: Early Modern

Britain:
Small Army
Huge Navy
Large Airforce
Few Nukes
Gov't: Constitutional Monarchy
Ruler: ?
Tech: Early Modern

Blueb Heaven:
Medium Army
Medium Navy
Small Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Fascism
Ruler: ?
Tech Level: Late Industrial


Warsaw Pact:

USSR:
Huge Army
Small Navy
Small Airforce
Few Nukes
Govt: Communism
Ruler: Ivan Aronovich (Rotten999)
Tech Level: Early Modern

China:
Huge Army
No Navy
No Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Communism
Ruler: ?
Tech: Late Industrial

Poland:
Huge Army
Small Navy
No Airforce
Few Nukes
Govt: Communism
Ruler: Metaliturtle
Tech Level: Late Industrial

Greece:
Small Army
Small Navy
Small Airforce
Few Nukes
Govt: Communism
Ruler: ?
Tech: Early Modern

Canada:
Medium Army
Medium Navy
Large Airforce
Govt: Republic
Ruler: William Canuk (SKILORD)
Tech Level: Early Modern


Band of the Jihad:
Plotting a nuclear attack on everyone

Iran:
Medium Army
No Navy
No Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Theocracy
Ruler: ?
Tech: Late Industrial

Iraq:
Small Army
Small Navy
No Airforce
Few Nukes
Govt: Theocracy
Ruler: Camel Huissain (Samuel Johnson)
Tech Level: Late Industrial

Egypt:
Medium Army
Small Navy
Small Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler: ?
Tech Level: Early Modern


Native Alliance:

Japan:
Small Army
Large Navy
Medium Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Monarchy
Ruler: ?
Tech Level: Early Modern

Zulu Empire:
Large Army
Small Navy
No Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Republic
Ruler: ?
Tech Level: Late Industrial


Other/No alliances:

India:
Small Army
Small Navy
No Airforce
No Nukes
Govt: Democracy
Ruler: ?
Tech Level: Early Modern


I plan on constantly updating this post (unlike SKILORD is doing with the first post ) to include both alliances and military/nuclear buildups, as well as the world map (note: Blueb Heaven (aka Aztecs) has been reverted back to green).

MAP:

[civman2000]

Because Guyana is dead, I'll take over America as Dubya.

[Rotten999]

USSR has declared Germany a criminal nation for its dealing with countries that are known to be completely irresponsible. It also reminds the world that the MAD doctrine is in place, and any nuclear aggression will be answered in kind.

The Soviets would like to remind the United States that as the other super power they have certain responsibilites, especially averting a possible nuclear holocaust.

Poland is requested to lift the blockade, barring direct German hostility.

[civman2000]

Dubya chuckled upon reading the Soviet report. "Averting a possible nuclear holocaust", LOL. Hidden to the world, American troops moved Northward, approaching the Canadian border.

Meanwhile, nuclear silos throughout the country were quickly filling up.

"Certain responsibilites, especially averting a possible nuclear holocaust."

Dubya couldnt help but burst out into maniacal laughter.

"Any nuclear aggression will be answered in kind." Not if all their nukes have already been sabotaged, MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!


He then remembered that he had work to do! He had just received the OK from the Senate, and he began typing a message to Canada:

Prime Minister William Canuk of the Dominion of Canada,

DO you realize what you are doing? By beign in the Warsaw pact, you are supporting Tyranny and a horrible disrespect of human rights. You oppose all ideas of freedom on which your republic government is based. You have one last chance to make up for these sins and join NATO. THere are also political reasons for doing so. Right now, NATO is equally strong or even stronger than the Warsaw Pact. If you join NATO, NATO will be he strongest alliance system in the world by far and you will have no worries about being on the losing side in a war. The last reason is that the American Armyis prepared to crush your nation if given ANY provocation from ANY member of the Warsaw Pact.

You have 2 weeks to decide whether to side with good or evil.

President Dubya of the United States of America