Swissy1 Turn Post #3

[Lung]

Hehe, where are the Poms on the medal board, eh?!!?!

Turn 170 to Mathias.

[St Jon]

Turn 171 to Lung.

[Lung]

Turn 171 to Matthew.

[St Jon]

Turn 172 to the current holder of the Olympic records in both Duplicity and Deceit as well as captain of the 'Beach Screw a Pom' Team Competition Gold Medalists.

[Lung]

GRRR! Stupid @#$% ISP! They've disconnected me AGAIN! Snarl !! Sorry, guys . I will be back up and running shortly, and play my turn in about 10 hours.

Hey, Jon! Whaddya mean, deceitful?! Have you reduced your military readiness yet?? Hmmm?!? We are a peaceful nation, and only built up in strength to deter the aggressive English from invasion. It is the Australians that fear deceit by the English after a history of breaking agreements . We have only reduced our military readiness to "on alert", due to our lack of trust of the English, and consider our action to be a huge leap of faith as it should have been the English who reduced their military readiness first. However, be warned that if the English betray Australia, they will find a defence of insurmountable proportions, and will suffer greatly as a result.

Also, did we beat you in the beach wallyball or something? Just because Bondi beach fills up with Pommies every New Year's doesn't mean you own that you own the place Actually, i want to put in a team of fat people just to make their officials rue their stupid rules of skimpy attire

Well, i'm all olympic-ed out after two weeks of partying, cheering, and drinking in our huge international love-fest that it turned out to be. People talking to each other on trains, no traffic jams, strangers meeting in the street, drunken Aussies adopting unfortunate foreign athletes who happened to stroll too close to them (as i saw on more than one occasion), everyone chanting "Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, oi, oi, oi!" and breaking out into the national anthem for no apparent reason. I'm suffering the post-olympic blues!

It was bigger than Ben Hur! No more being the centre of the universe What will we do now? Anyway, we beat the Poms, we beat the Canadians, we beat the Kiwis, we beat ALL of europe. We even beat the Yanks in an event which they'd never ever been beaten in before.

Anyway, i'm back at work now, so i better go and do something

[Lung]

Australia has immediately returned to "at war" status due to the failure of English troops to follow the Australian lead, yet again reneging on a deal which the Australians naively trusted the English.

Now, if the English wish a reduction in military readiness, then they will have to do so first, and Australia will follow. Threat of an English invasion looms high, and will be thus treated as such until they stand down. Fresh from a recent victory over the Native Americans, the battle-hardened Australian troops will defend our sovereignty at all costs.

Turn 172 to Jon.

[St Jon]

The English did not get the chance as they did not know until after the event!

[Lung]

Bull****!!! Lying English scum!!!

Turn 174 to Matthew.

[St Jon]

Oh legendary One, Please do accept my humblest apologies for a tiny administrative oversight. As head of the English Peace Corps I have had to deal with many complex redeployments in my final push to bring salvation to the Primitives. All will be remedied upon receipt of Turn 175.

Your Friend and Ally
Archbishop Jon

[St Jon]

Turn 175 to Lung.

All I hope has been resolved.

Peace, Happiness and Tranquility should have been restored.

Fondest Wishes,
Archbishop Jon

[St Jon]

Turn 176 to Lung.

Goodwill in abundance to you.

[Lung]

As if!!

I wonder what pleasant suprise Jon has in store for me when i get home?

[Lung]

Let this day be noted in history...

as the day the treacherous English massacred the innocent victims of New Newcastle under the guise of peace!!! Not only was the city burned to the ground by the crazed English soldiers, but the civilians were murdered in cold blood despite pleas for mercy

Australia is deeply saddened by reports by the few survivors of the New Newcastle massacre, as memorials are held around the country in honour of those courageous soldiers of the Australian 1st Division who went down fighting against overwhelming odds. They showered themselves in glory by weakening the advancing English army while never retreating or laying down their arms.

This day will go down for eternity as the day Australia learned the folly of trusting the English, and the means that must be used to defend our sovereignty. The English clearly cannot be trusted, and so must pay in BLOOD!!!

It's time that Lung the Legendary lead by example and showed the Australian army the way! The throne will be occupied by his son, Lung II, until Lung the Legendary either returns or dies in battle against the devil incarnate. This will inspire the Australian troops to prevail against the advancing hordes in what will be a grand victory!! Hail Lung the Legendary! Hail!!!

[St Jon]

A three front War! Can even the heroic English stand firm against such an onslaught? We believe so for we have truth and justice upon our side!

As for the accusations of treachery I would question just how did an Australian Phalanx find itself able to attack, unsuccessfully, so remote a City as Hastings? Has the 'Legendary One' managed to prototype the World's first Air-Mobile Ancient Age Infantry? Was the Australian Spy merely taking a vacation in England? Did The Vikings simply happen to have an Army Group at the Gates of Stratford?

Perfidy I cry! My pre-emptive self defence has been entirely vindicated for I find myself to have been the victim of a long laid conspiracy to destroy my fair land.

[Lung]

LIES!!

What feeble excuses the English have used to invade the peaceful Australian empire! Since when do border guards constitute justification for all-out war?!?? The only reason units were near Hastings was in anticipation of an English invasion, which materialised in form of an entire army marching on Yattehyatteh!

With such a huge border to defend, and an absence of information on where the invasion was to come from, it was a pertinent decision, and entirely consistent with sound defensive patterns.

There is no justification in invading Australia, as Australia has never initiated war with England, unlike England, whose militaristic history precedes them! The meglomania of St. Jon brings to question the dubious circumstances surrounding the downfall of the previous English leader Steve Bunn, who proved to be peaceful and honourable, unlike St. Jon. What sort of evil happenings took place at this time at the hands of St. Jon??

Following is the history of England St. Jon's dubious rise to power;-

Since his rise to power, England has had delusions of greatness and has followed an agenda of world domination and conquest. The horrific occupation of Native America and the preceding ruthless war sent shockwaves throughout the world. Australian peacekeepers were attacked without warning or provocation, and their deaths have not been forgotten.
Despite please for mercy, Native America was subject to genocide on a massive scale. Is it surprising that Australia deployed troops to provide advanced warning of imminent attack by the English? Another peace treaty was proposed to avoid war and halt military build-up on both sides. This failed to stop England from continuing their military build-up, so, in order to calm relations between our empires even further, a stand-down agreement was reached, but while the gesture was honoured by the ADF, the English exploited the opportunity by invading Australia and subjecting our people to yet more genocide!

It is clear to the world that the English are, under the iron-fist rule of St.Jon, just a bunch of savage, treacherous, lying, back-stabbing power-mad demons from HELL!!! The English empire is the epitomy of evil and must be subdued at all costs!

In war news, the battle of Yattehyatteh has been been ferocious and resulted in a great loss of lives by both sides so far, but the brave defenders of Yattehyatteh have held out against a massive English army in what amounts to our first real victory against the English war machine. Many awards for bravery will surely be awarded for the heroism that was on display by the Australian troops, some so heroic they may even be awarded the prestigious Lung Cross for unnatural bravery. We won the battle, but the fight to save Yattehyatteh from the evil clutches of St.Jon is far from over, with a large contingent of English Jackboots still looming over the great Australian city.

The battle of Yattehyatteh will go down in history as the battle which saw humanity take second place to pure unadulterated greed by St.Jon the Demonic.