The Devil of Nkwalini

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Just two things Scratch when do I get me badge and what was the other potion for in the tale of two gardens?

[unscratchedfoot]

Tra la la

[steamthunk]

Well I did just finish reading up to what you have so far. No offense Mr. 'foot, but if you keep declaring that you're not going to finish stories here that does make it a bit hard for people to have confidence that they should read the next thing you write.

IMHO you've got some interesting ideas, but this makes 2 stories [Winds of Change being the other] I've read from you which I liked, but might never get finished. It's frustrating.

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Sorry mate, Ive got agree with steamthunk on this, youre letting those of us who do respond down.

I hope you change your mind>

[unscratchedfoot]

Chris continued his explanation. "In college I studied many subjects about the Zulu nation, including one class on traditional methods of healing. You may be interested to know that they have powerful methods of altering one's state of consciousness - 'hypnotism' to us. When I saw what happened in Mengani, and remembered what happened to the rebels just hours earlier, I think someone among those villagers just might be one of those powerful hypnotists I learned about. Then just now I saw some of the same villagers from the village where the patrols were killed, a woman carrying an infant girl to be exact, in one of those trucks."

"So this 'hypnotist' was trying to 'heal' our boys was she?" Rogers looked gravely serious with his customary commander's mustache, cold calculating eyes and forehead furrowed with wrinkles so deep they reminded Chris of the trenches used in perimeter defence.

"They are said to normally use hypnotism for healing, but on rare occasions will even use it to destroy people. What's happening here seems to be a type where the victim sees his friends and foes reversed and in extremity. Captain Tubbs and his men were actually trying to protect the villagers while blowing each other apart."

Rogers continued listening without interruption so Chris went on. "The hypnotism is conveyed by reciting an ancient Zulu script. This is why the artillery battery heard Tubb's radio operator speaking in swahili. In fact he was trying to call in an arty strike on his own platoon, but couldn't because his speech was lost to the script. It is rumored, but has never been confirmed by an eye witness, that the chanting of the script can spread like a wild fire among the targeted individuals and infect all those within hearing range. This may explain why the slaughter of our soldiers was so complete."

Chris let the words sink in while Rogers looked back at him with what seemed to be the deepest hatred. After at least a minute of tortured silence, Rogers suddenly marched out of the command tent and broke into a run towards the truck jam. Despite Rogers being a very fit man, for he regulated himself as strickly as the men under his command, it was the first time Chris had ever seen him run while on duty.

Chris walked out of the tent with a feeling of hope rising in him. He silently thanked fate that Rogers had the rare virtue among commanders of being a good listener.

He could see Rogers standing among the jammed trucks and clouds of dust. He bellowed orders at each of the drivers and waved his arms furiously this way and that. In only a moment the obstructing trucks had moved to the side to make way for the 3 prisoner trucks. Only then did Chris realize what was happening. Rogers was hurrying the trucks towards the interrogation chambers.

All feelings of hope turned into dread as Chris sprinted up to the colonel to stop impending doom. Chris yelled as loud as he could to make sure he was heard over the sounds of all the trucks. "Sir, I beg. You must get these trucks out of the base. Too many soldiers' lives are at stake here!"

Rogers ignored Chris' pleas and continued barking out orders and waving his arms. After the trucks were cleared and on their way, Rogers walked by Chris and said gravely, "I wanna test this theory of yours."

"You'll get us all killed!" Chris knew he was way out of line talking like this to a superior but he felt he had no choice.

"Intelligence are smart people. They'll test her out in a controlled labatory environment. I want you to come and watch it. We may need your input. I'll put the assault on the rebel base on hold until we see the results."

Chris not only had totally failed to prevent an apparent disaster, but he was being taken into the very lair of the beast itself.

[vovan]

Very interesting, unscratchedfoot. Please do continue, and never mind the sometimes apparent lack of feedback. Just look at the number of views of your thread and see that people are reading your stories. Keep it coming

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Nice !!

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Unscratched if you get chance go tell the guitarist what you think of his second story.

[unscratchedfoot]

Originally posted by vovansim
Please do continue, and never mind the sometimes apparent lack of feedback. Just look at the number of views of your thread and see that people are reading your stories. Keep it coming

This is exactly what I'm talking about. My story shows 59 hits with 22 responses. That's less than 3 views per reponse. I guess you, Chris and steamthunk are the only people reading my story. This forum is becoming like a small, knit group, the regulars are so few, especially if those nes things are moved to their own forum (which would make sense since they can't be considered creative writing).

[Kizami]

Love the story so far. Keep it up!

[vovan]

Originally posted by unscratchedfoot
That's less than 3 views per reponse. I guess you, Chris and steamthunk are the only people reading my story.

Ouch, the encouragement didn't work very well, I guess. But then look at it from the other side: I say the views counter is broken! It is, honestly.

Look at my latest poll, set up to find out what kinds of stories people like. It has two replies from other people, and one from me, and eight people voted. That means that there should be at least ten views! I viewed it once, plus the eight people who voted, plus Chrisius, who still can't vote, but did post a reply. Now, let's take a peek at the "views" counter. It shows a tremedous number: 0 (zero). Well, in that case, can you imagine how many views you are really getting if you at least get the number 60 or whatever?

Now, I see that you have been over at the CivFanatics forums as well, Scratch. I don't usually post there, but I usually do read the stories. You cannot fail to notice that the number of responses to stories is also very low. It's the same three-four people, that are giving feedback all the time.

[unscratchedfoot]

Thanks Kizami.

Volvonism, yeah, I thought the counter doo-da was a bit wacko too. I used put my stories on the fanatics forum as well but don't bother anymore because they strongly prefer war stories over dramas. If you post a pure-war story there you might get some keen interest though. Most of the fanatics readers are in their teens. I think apolyton much prefers dramas over pure action.

[vovan]

Originally posted by unscratchedfoot
Volvonism <...>

Hehe. Tell me something, Scratchy, do you have fun changing people's nicks over in general, and mine in particular?

[unscratchedfoot]

It only took one hour for Rogers to explain the situation to the intelligence team and for them to set up the experiment. Into the dreaded, dark underground interrogation chamber went Rogers, Kann, Chris and 4 military police for back-up.

Walking through the underground hallway, Chris was astonished at how makeshift it was: just a walkway and rooms dug into the ground supported by lumber and timber beams. A dull yellow light illuminated it every couple of metres. On the way down, Rogers spoke to Kann. "Did you get an ETA on McMann's chopper?"

General McMann, thought Chris. Why were they bringing the highest ranking general outside of England to this? McMann was based in Zimbabwe and mainly handled the logistics and support for the British occupation forces in Zululand.

"It'll be here at 1145 hours, that's 10 minutes from now sir." Kann answered.

The group headed into the grim chamber where the experiment was being prepared. Inside a large cage sat the woman still holding onto her scared child. Across from her and also in the cage was a young recruit who looked even more scared than the little girl. He was in uniform but carried no weapons. Chris recognized the cage as the one which had previously held Veronica - the base's pet lioness which had been shot by a drunk soldier after she peed on him. The incident had earned the soldier a month in the brig and the distain of everyone at the base. Outside the cage were 3 intelligence members who were discussing something among themselves. One of them approached the group as they arrived.

"Good day gentlemen. My name is Damien and I will am in charge here. I'm going to have to ask you all first to remove the clips from your guns and rounds out of the chambers. When you are done that would you please place your guns into the rack on the wall to your right. You may keep your ammunition with you. Yes colonel, that includes you. I would ask the same of the queen if she were here."

Chris could hear Kann's snively voice infront of him, talking to an MP, "Since when does the queen pack a 50 calibre desert eagle?" Kann followed it up with a snicker.

There was a flurry of clicks as they reluctantly complied. Rogers was last to put his beloved Desert Eagle into the rack. He was crazy about shooting competitions and rarely parted with his sidearm. It was rumored among that he even showered with it strapped on to his side. "Thank you gentlemen. Now please stand aside." said Damien. The intelligence crew in turn emptied their pistols and put them in the rack. Damien then took a key out of his pocket and locked the rack mechanism around the barrels of the guns and then pulled down a shutter over the rack and locked it as well.

"Is all this really necessary?" Rogers asked skeptically with a deep frown.

"Colonel, if anything happens here, you'll wish we had melted the guns. Trust us. We know what we're doing. Okay, I'm going to need you people to keep your distance from the cage for safety reasons. The woman's name is Thandi and her child is called Nokothula. Say them with me now: Than-di No-ko-thu-la. That's it. We've made a bargain with Thandi that if she complies with our request that she hypnotise one, and only one, person that she and the other villagers will be spared hardship."

"Have you completely lost it down here? I can't believe you'd make a deal like that with the devil! Remember what she did to our boys out there in the field?" Rogers was turning red in the face, but no one noticed in the pale yellow light.

"We'll discuss the details of handling the prisoners after the experiment has been completed sir. For now would you please move back from the cage. Thank you."

Chris could here Kann whispering again to the MP. "Thandi? Sounds kinda like Bambi doesn't it?" And again came the inevitable snicker.

Shortly after, General McMann arrived with 2 officers. McMann was a tall man with a chest full of colorful decorations. Unlike the traditional commander's mustache, he had a gotee. He held his head high and looked down on people as if to convey his importance. They had been warned in advance and were already unarmed.

Damien made sure everyone was at a safe distance and said, "Very well then. Let's begin."

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Well done scratchy, youve got me hooked dont you dare stop now.

Vovans theory is right and I reckon theres loads of things wrong with poly at the moment , take a look at the community forum and youll see for yourself!