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Editor's Forward:
In the colleges of the Political Sciences, the memoirs of the "Emperor of all Emperors", Gandhi Kahn the Wise, are studied by undergraduates and analyzed minutely by graduate students, but, curiously, an abridged version for teenaged learners has never before been attempted.
This edition contains much of the framework and flavor of the actual memoirs, but sacrifices many details in favor of brevity. Furthermore, rather than presenting the subject using statistics and maps, the memoirs have been fictionalized to aid the young student's interest and enjoyment.
The entire sixteen-volume set is beyond all but the most advanced non-matriculated students. It is our hope to bring this inspiring subject to the inquisitive scholar and to whet the appetite for further study.
The Sino-Indian War
"For a regent bent on peaceful co-existence, I've had to resort to a lot of violence. Perhaps in some alternate universe, the name Gandhi evokes thoughts of peace, and the name Genghis doesn't bring to mind the non-violent liberation of the Mongols from the Chinese empire. Of course, if you read that sort of claptrap, then the evil alternate Genghis would have the requisite goatee instead of his smooth shaven face. Don't know why they always use the goatee to signify evilness. I've always rather liked mine."
Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, Chronicles of Gandhi Kahn the Wise
The council meeting was going about as I had expected.
The schedule for the annual Celebration of Empire had been approved. The budget compromise had been passed, although my Science Advisor, Siddheiers, still wanted more for research, and Domestic Advisor Dhanyata thought more money for luxuries was the path to a better empire.
The only item remaining on the agenda was finding a solution to the Chinese-Egyptian problem. Nehru, my Foreign Advisor, was holding out for a diplomatic solution. Of course, I enjoy absolute power, and could order the assault without the consent of any of my advisors, but I have always found it better to seek accord before action. I believe that internal agreement prevents insurgent conflict.
"Nehru," I argued, "can't you see that diplomacy will not work in this situation? We don't have enough clout with Cleopatra to convince her to call off her chariots."
He frowned. "Sire, the Sino-Indian war ended when we promised Mao we would cease hostilities. If we break our word, no other civilization will believe us when we claim to come in peace."
Devon, my Military Advisor, jumped in before I could. "If Cleo beats us to Beijing, we will have no access to our new cities. We can rebuild our 'reputation,' but it will cost Indian blood to retake those cities."
"I'm afraid I must concur, Nehru," said Sangita, my Cultural Advisor. "My departmental analysis shows that Shanghai and Nanking will become Egyptian within two generations of an Egyptian conquest of Beijing, either through armed conflict or revolt."
"You don't have my support, either, old boy," said Trade Advisor, Rujula. "If we lose Nanking, we lose its silk farms, and we'll have to start paying Cleo for that luxury. The budget is already too tight in the luxury department."
"Rujula, you needlessly deplete your karma," I said. "In a good compromise, everyone's a little unhappy. If you complain again, I may have to recommend a reanalysis and a vote on a new budget, which, I assure you, would make you much unhappier!"
Rujula's grimace was thoroughly rewarding.
"Nehru," I said, returning to the debate, "we went through all this at the beginning of the war. That little baby-faced boy-king may look innocent, but remember how they plunked down all their new cities on our border."
Nehru puffed up into his academician pose, having indeed been one prior to selection to my cabinet. "And as I pointed out then, they did so because they were hemmed in by the Egyptians to the east, by the Western Ocean, and by the glory of India in the south."
"And as *I* pointed out then, we merely joined in the reduction of China after the Egyptians and Japanese had already declared war. We'd all had enough of his bluster: 'Just you wait 'til we get our Riders trained! You'll all be absorbed into the Chinese Empire. We will bury you!' Whine, whine, whine!"
"What about public opinion?" asked Nehru, searching for a better argument. "People won't be so happy about renewing the war when the casualty lists start getting longer and longer."
"Are you kidding me?" shouted Devon, "Our swordsmen barely broke a sweat taking Canton and Tsingtao. When they massed around Beijing, Mao practically wet his pants."
"Devon is right," I said, covering the contradiction to his early argument about spilling Indian blood. "The Chinese were so eager to avoid the carnage they would have signed anything! For Shiva's sake, you were the one with the brilliant idea to demand Shanghai and Nanking in the negotiations! Do you want to lose them now because you have qualms about our reputation?
"Either we get the city or Cleo does," said Dhanyata.
Suddenly, I saw the solution. "Nehru, if we declare war, exactly which nations will view our reputation as damaged?"
"Egypt, Japan and Russia," he replied.
I could see in his eyes a building hope that he was swaying the monarch. I paused for effect before I shoved the knife home.
"Wouldn't our reputation with Egypt and Japan actually be increased if we join in their crusade against China?"
Nehru looked stunned, then grinned. "You are right, of course. I hereby change my vote."
"Very well. Devon, pass the order."
Devon placed his palms together and raised them to touch the forehead, the position of the Third Eye. "As you command, O Mahatma. Namaskar."
[Ed. Namaskar, the popular term of greeting and farewell, literally means 'I bow to thee.']
More tomorrow...
In the colleges of the Political Sciences, the memoirs of the "Emperor of all Emperors", Gandhi Kahn the Wise, are studied by undergraduates and analyzed minutely by graduate students, but, curiously, an abridged version for teenaged learners has never before been attempted.
This edition contains much of the framework and flavor of the actual memoirs, but sacrifices many details in favor of brevity. Furthermore, rather than presenting the subject using statistics and maps, the memoirs have been fictionalized to aid the young student's interest and enjoyment.
The entire sixteen-volume set is beyond all but the most advanced non-matriculated students. It is our hope to bring this inspiring subject to the inquisitive scholar and to whet the appetite for further study.
The Sino-Indian War
"For a regent bent on peaceful co-existence, I've had to resort to a lot of violence. Perhaps in some alternate universe, the name Gandhi evokes thoughts of peace, and the name Genghis doesn't bring to mind the non-violent liberation of the Mongols from the Chinese empire. Of course, if you read that sort of claptrap, then the evil alternate Genghis would have the requisite goatee instead of his smooth shaven face. Don't know why they always use the goatee to signify evilness. I've always rather liked mine."
Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, Chronicles of Gandhi Kahn the Wise
The council meeting was going about as I had expected.
The schedule for the annual Celebration of Empire had been approved. The budget compromise had been passed, although my Science Advisor, Siddheiers, still wanted more for research, and Domestic Advisor Dhanyata thought more money for luxuries was the path to a better empire.
The only item remaining on the agenda was finding a solution to the Chinese-Egyptian problem. Nehru, my Foreign Advisor, was holding out for a diplomatic solution. Of course, I enjoy absolute power, and could order the assault without the consent of any of my advisors, but I have always found it better to seek accord before action. I believe that internal agreement prevents insurgent conflict.
"Nehru," I argued, "can't you see that diplomacy will not work in this situation? We don't have enough clout with Cleopatra to convince her to call off her chariots."
He frowned. "Sire, the Sino-Indian war ended when we promised Mao we would cease hostilities. If we break our word, no other civilization will believe us when we claim to come in peace."
Devon, my Military Advisor, jumped in before I could. "If Cleo beats us to Beijing, we will have no access to our new cities. We can rebuild our 'reputation,' but it will cost Indian blood to retake those cities."
"I'm afraid I must concur, Nehru," said Sangita, my Cultural Advisor. "My departmental analysis shows that Shanghai and Nanking will become Egyptian within two generations of an Egyptian conquest of Beijing, either through armed conflict or revolt."
"You don't have my support, either, old boy," said Trade Advisor, Rujula. "If we lose Nanking, we lose its silk farms, and we'll have to start paying Cleo for that luxury. The budget is already too tight in the luxury department."
"Rujula, you needlessly deplete your karma," I said. "In a good compromise, everyone's a little unhappy. If you complain again, I may have to recommend a reanalysis and a vote on a new budget, which, I assure you, would make you much unhappier!"
Rujula's grimace was thoroughly rewarding.
"Nehru," I said, returning to the debate, "we went through all this at the beginning of the war. That little baby-faced boy-king may look innocent, but remember how they plunked down all their new cities on our border."
Nehru puffed up into his academician pose, having indeed been one prior to selection to my cabinet. "And as I pointed out then, they did so because they were hemmed in by the Egyptians to the east, by the Western Ocean, and by the glory of India in the south."
"And as *I* pointed out then, we merely joined in the reduction of China after the Egyptians and Japanese had already declared war. We'd all had enough of his bluster: 'Just you wait 'til we get our Riders trained! You'll all be absorbed into the Chinese Empire. We will bury you!' Whine, whine, whine!"
"What about public opinion?" asked Nehru, searching for a better argument. "People won't be so happy about renewing the war when the casualty lists start getting longer and longer."
"Are you kidding me?" shouted Devon, "Our swordsmen barely broke a sweat taking Canton and Tsingtao. When they massed around Beijing, Mao practically wet his pants."
"Devon is right," I said, covering the contradiction to his early argument about spilling Indian blood. "The Chinese were so eager to avoid the carnage they would have signed anything! For Shiva's sake, you were the one with the brilliant idea to demand Shanghai and Nanking in the negotiations! Do you want to lose them now because you have qualms about our reputation?
"Either we get the city or Cleo does," said Dhanyata.
Suddenly, I saw the solution. "Nehru, if we declare war, exactly which nations will view our reputation as damaged?"
"Egypt, Japan and Russia," he replied.
I could see in his eyes a building hope that he was swaying the monarch. I paused for effect before I shoved the knife home.
"Wouldn't our reputation with Egypt and Japan actually be increased if we join in their crusade against China?"
Nehru looked stunned, then grinned. "You are right, of course. I hereby change my vote."
"Very well. Devon, pass the order."
Devon placed his palms together and raised them to touch the forehead, the position of the Third Eye. "As you command, O Mahatma. Namaskar."
[Ed. Namaskar, the popular term of greeting and farewell, literally means 'I bow to thee.']
More tomorrow...