The Kings of Sumer (continued from SNES)

[Samuel Johnson]

The SNES thread that inspired this is at:

http://apolyton.net/forums/showthrea...0&pagenumber=1


However, this story has changed significantly from that thread. I have used some of the characters created there - most significantly Beria who was created by Rotten999.

The story assumes that the allies fell apart in World War II and left USSR to win the war. Britain has fallen into anarchy and the USA has going socialist and isolationist.

The USSR had to create a second Army with Eastern Europe and this meant they had to let the Eastern Europeans enjoy some of the spoils. The Middle East also contributed and hence Iraq was allowed to dominate Turkey and consolidate the Kurds.

After a time as a theocracy, the Iraqis have found their roots and are now called the Republic of Babylon. The northerners and the cosmopolitans in Bhagdad dominate the southern religious sects for the most part. Saddam Hussein has been deposed and is missing. I think that's enough backstory to get you going.

[Samuel Johnson]

THIS CHAPTER IS CURRENTLY UNNUMBERED

President Fareeka Rafsannjanni was actually quite the stunner for her age and size but her style and stance was so drastic that no one really noticed her beauty. This being the mid ‘50s, and in a Muslim country, she cut quite the figure in fashion wear -- preferring self-designed coveralls tucked into Azerbaijani leather boots. The coveralls were usually dyed in bright colors such as orange or red and she even had a more formal version that was black. She wore a small tire’s worth of metal jewelry around her neck and waist and preferred large, gold, hoop rings in her ears. It tended to offset the male-ish clothing and shortly cropped died-blonde hair. Her physique was well honed and she was more than capable in most martial arts.

Her attire and her personal behavior had so scandalized the Mullahs of the South that they now just chose to think of her as a man -- it made their recent alliance with her more palatable. Fareeka and many of her set had adopted a very liberal interpretation of her religion and for all intents and purposes she was not even practicing anymore.

Despite the wartime footing she now found herself on, her idiot assistant had scheduled 15 minutes with a trade representative. She sat on her desk, crossed her legs and picked her nails with a diamond studded letter opener.

“Come!”

The door opened and a rather stout fireplug of a man with an eyepatch walked in. She gave him a dismissive look and went back to her nails.

“Yes?”

“Ma’am. I’m the new trade advisor.”

“And you need my time for…? You realize we may be in a war by tonight, don’t you? What’s your name?”

“Joe.”

“Okay. Joe. What do you need my time for?” A little calmer, this time. And she flashed her trademark phony smile at him.

Joe had been in the Army and usually didn’t scare well but he felt a bit of trembling in his feet. He brought out a glass container and showed it to her.

Inside was an odd pink-red rectangular block probably a few centimeters squared in size.

“Ma’am. You put it in your mouth.”

She arched her eyebrows and leaned back on the desk to maneuver her free hand closer to the red button. In her other hand, she subtly put the letter-opener into an attack grip.

“What? You want me to put this piece of, what is it? That new plastic stuff? You want me to put this in my mouth?”

“No, Ma’am. It’s like a candy but it’s also gum. With the plans in Hawaii now in swing, we have been experimenting with sugar-based food products. There’s more sugar in that thing than we have ever put in anything. The kids will be hooked.”

She brought her free hand up, took the container, considered it, shrugged, opened thecontainer and shook the candy out into her mouth.

She tentatively chewed and then her chewing got more quick. “Mmmm. Yes, excellent. The children will enjoy this. But, you’re going to need another hook, Joe. Something to attract the kids. Think about it, like… I dunno, maybe pictures of their favorite Babylonian Kings or something.” She waved her hands up and down and made a sour, adult face. “This is quite sugary, though” and spit the gum into her wastebasket. She missed and the gum lay there on her black marble floor.

“Anyway. Think about a better way to market it. And then I'll set up the deals you need with Hawaii. I’m going there soon and can bring along one of your staff to negotiate if you would like.”

Joe beamed. “Wow, Ma’am. Great. I’ll get back to you on the marketing,” he said, shaking his head and smiling on the way out.

“Oh, Joe. You were in the Army. Where did you serve?”

He turned around and puffed out his chest. “84th Infantry in Aden. I’m hearing they may be calling me back soon,” he said proudly. “We’re gonna whip those Polish and the Russkies, right?”

“Well, hopefully, it won’t get to that point, Joe.”

He smiled at her and put out his hand. “Ma’am, we’re really proud of you in the trade department. You’re opening up the radio market to commercial interests and ridding the rest of the media of state control. These are great free market ideas and will do more to undermine our rivals in the future than anything. Your quite amazing decision to release the cryptographic codes. Just amazing, Ma’am. We also support your actions against the NGVD. Those arrogant bastards needed a lesson. Can I shake your hand, Ma’am?”

Fareeka put down the letter opener, stood up, went over to him and took his hand. She made a strange tilt of her head towards him. She was touched by this display. It had been so long since someone had said anything nice to her face that wasn’t sycophantic.

“Yes, sure, Joe,” she said and looked into his eyes. Grey-blue, friendly but still intense.

“Ma’am, my friends all call me `Bazooka’, `Bazooka Joe’ Topps. So glad to be working for you.”

He turned and almost goose-stepped out of the room in glee. Gee, wait ‘till I tell all my buddies back in the Riyadh ghetto. They always thought I was just a comedian and wouldn’t amount to much. He started chuckling about some of the knuckleheads from his childhood and all the tricks they used to play on each other.

He snapped his fingers in the air as he briskly walked out of the outer office, saying to himself loudly, “Say, that gives me an idea!”

Fareeka stood at the doorway watching him leave and giggled at his little finger snapping outburst. He reminds me of those happy-go-lucky guys from the American ‘40s movies that she always thought were the cutest.

Wait. Did I just think abut something that included “cute”?

She watched Bazooka Joe turn around after he went into the elevator. He caught her eye, smiled and waved as the door closed.

Fareeka waved back, blushed and suddenly she had a deep pain in her stomach. I haven’t felt like that since I was a school girl. He’s just a grubby little trade representative, probably of low birth, so why am I so incredibly turned on by him? She was a secret member of the Knife Master assassin cult, after all, and the most direct living descendent of the great Gilgamesh. What did she need for love? Strange…

She fluttered her hands to cool down her forehead and caught the secretary staring at her.

“What are you looking at? Get back to work.”

Fareeka managed to put it out of her mind by the time she went back to her desk. Just before she took her seat she felt something under her boot. With a little resistance, she was able to lift up the boot and examine the sole of the shoe.

“Eccch,” she muttered, looking at how the gum had stuck to the bottom of her boot. “Eccch.”

[Samuel Johnson]

THIS CHAPTER IS CURRENTLY UNNUMBERED

Modish Freemason looked around the 5,000 seat auditorium of the recently completed learning center. It was full – Freemasons from near and wide had traveled for this opening celebration and there was a good deal of press from many countries. He was relieved the recent tensions had not affected this celebration.

“And so, we see that nearly all the world’s myths and, most important to us, Babylonian myths, revolve around several principle themes. After the Great War, the Republic of Iraq funded a great deal of archeology that had previously been done by Germans and English. I was one of those trained archeologists. In Iraq, we discovered what the Germans had been suppressing. That is, the Great Flood did happen and the settlers from the arc ended somewhere near the Tigris and Euphrates where the city of Uruk now stands. This means that the Sumerians were indeed the first man of our era."

“Soon a great leader emerged – King Gilgamesh -- whom we had previously been told by the Europeans was a myth. We know now that Gilgamesh did in fact exist and much of our evidence is on display in the museum.”

The crowd murmered its approval.

The Polynesian King Kamehameha IV shifted uneasily in his seat. His clan advisor noticed his unease and touched him lightly on his right arm. The Polynesian potentate whispered into the advisor’s ear. “What do I care about this nonsense? When are these Babylonians going to come through with their deal to put the roads and infrastructure into Waikiki so we can profit from the tourist trade again? All I have seen so far is this farce about … about…dead kings and immortality.”

Kamehameha waved his hands back and forth for effect and then made a scoffing sound. The advisor whispered something in his ear and he calmed down.

Modish continued. “We have also found evidence that Gilgamesh actually made the first voyage around the world. This in itself is an incredible feat.” The audience murmured.

“But now I can reveal that we also have evidence that Gilgamesh visited this spot which the Americans called Diamond Head. We believe that "Diamond Head" was once the home of Up-napishtim, the immortal who guided the arc to Mesopotamia. We will be showing the evidence shortly.”

The international press looked unimpressed but looked around the room surprised when most of the Freemasons in the audience burst into excited chatter.

Well, Modish thought, we got that card on the table. Now let’s see what happens.

[civman2000]

not bad!

[Samuel Johnson]

THIS CHAPTER NOT YET NUMBERED


TRANSCRIPT PROVIDED BY SOVIET OPEN SOURCE INTELLIGENCE BUREAU INTERCEPTED BY PHOENIX

(Introduction music)

Announcer: If it's Sunday, it must be Meet the Press. With us today, the President of the Republic of Iraq and the Ambassador from the USSR to the US, Lenoid Brezhnev.

Meet the Press is bought to you by Skippy Peanut Butter, bringing good taste to the world and General Motor's new Electric car, the Whizzer, now achieving speeds of 25 mph.

And now, your host, Tim Bloard (TB).

TB: Thank you. And indeed welcome to Meet the Press, the place where world leaders meet the press, namely personified by me.

This past week tensions mounted as the USSR released photographic evidence that showed at the very least a henious attempt to subvert the peace process in Greece and at best an indictment of a whole country, a whole culture.

With us for the first time AND by satellite is President Fareeka Rafsannjanni from the newly renamed Republic of Babylon. Did I get that right (chuckles)? Good morning or should I say evening, President Rafsannjanni.

Fareeka Rafsannjanni (FR): Good morning, Tim. (smiles)

(TRANSCRIBERS NOTE: EXCEPT FOR A FEW ENGLISH PHRASES, RAFSANNJANNI USED A TRANSLATOR THROUGH THE INTERVIEW).

TB: Now before I go on, let me point out that we are making history here. This is the first broadcast, I am told, from your country via the new Canadian Television SATCOM network. You've come a pretty long way in a few years, Senator Rafsannjanni.

FR: Thank you, Tim. Yes, we are very proud to be the first country outside your hemisphere to develop this capability and we thank America again for partnering with us to increase television coverage in our, as you Americans say, our neck of the woods. (laughs)

TB: Yes. But let's get to the question that is on everyone's minds. These photos, I mean how can you deny these photos?

FR: Tim, I want to remind the world that the Soviet Union has not provided the bodies of these Iraqi soldiers -

TB: So you admit for the first time that these WERE Iraqi soldiers, then.

FR: Yes. These boys, I'm sorry, I mean soldiers were lost in patrol in the Caucasus Mountains last week. There was nothing on their record that suggested they would do this nor have they ever been in close proximity to our nuclear weapons. Not that we admit we have any, but if we did, I can assure the world that they are in a safe place.

TB: Thank you, Madame President but speaking quite frankly, how can you prove that these solders, as you have revealed today, weren't stealing weapons from the Russians? We know they have a huge stockpile of them.

FR: That's an interesting theory but would the Russian missiles have Iraqi markings on them? These boys didn't even know how to shoot a machine gun, they were kids, I'm sorry, soldiers out on patrol. Two of these boys, uh, soldiers were only 18 years old. We have already provided these records and we have invited the international press to evaluate our evidence. Where is the Soviet's evidence? And yes, I am aware of the Soviet's huge stockpile of nuclear weapons.

TB: But Madame President, why would the Soviets do this? Since the end of their last real war - which I point out was with Iraq or Babylon or whatever - they have been working on peaceful solutions to world problems. They spent a ton of their money on nuclear cleanup - in other countries. Their work on genetics is already showing dividends in medicines.

FR: Tim, that sounds like the party line. Don't you remember the USSR's recent wars of imperialism in South Africa and their embarassing attempt to take over Australia - what was it, in the name of fighting terrorists? Such nonsense. And you saw the speech by Beria the other day - he said he is killing all the space and genetics programs. No, this is a very dangerous time and the world should take heed. I especially warn the Warsaw Pact members not to go down this path for they will only create a monster which will then devour them. Tim, I find it an international scandal that only a few newspapers and radio stations are checking into these reports from refugees in Eastern Europe on the forced labor. The Greeks in Warsaw Pact controlled territories are also complaining about the lack of free speech, the sham elections they hold and the brutality of the Russian police.

I can only imagine that with Beria growing his war machine again that these incidents of slave labor are going to continue.

Does America really want to align themselves with this evil? Does Canada?

TB: Well, I can't answer that question. I'm the press, you know as in meet the press. We don't answer questions.

FR: Well, Tim, then ask me a question.

TB: Um, 'kay. Uh, so, if B-B-Babylon, if you are innocent of this and other terrorist acts, then what do you propose we do in the world?

FR: Thank you for an intelligent question.

First, we need to elect a new leader for the UN. As you know, the Zulu leadership in exile in Egypt have announced that they support the imprisoned Bishop Tutu for this position and I'm going to make more history tonight. The Republic of Babylon seconds the motion for Bishop Tutu. We ask the Soviets to immediately release Bishop Tutu.

Second, we are unilaterally removing our forces from Greece. Not because we have done anything wrong but because we feel the current world situation is too tense. We support the continuation of the U.N. resolution for a Greek independence vote - we no longer support the regional elections but would like to see the elections occur on time. We will leave all infrastructure that we have built for the Greeks to defend themselves including the police stations in Crete and the Aegean Islands. We apologize to the Greek people for not keeping our promise to protect them but we know the whole world will be watching what the USSR does next. Uday Hussein will direct the removal of our troops personally and take down the Babylonian flag in Athens.

Third, I want to inform the world that the recent assasinations which Beria has mistakenly taken credit for was actually the work of internal terrorists and criminals. Beria had nothing to do with it. We think these terrorists infiltrated the Soviet agents, who were in this country illegally, I might add, and murdered them all. They must have used Soviet intelligence to get our Senators and Governors and I call on all countries not just to condemn the terrorism and criminal behaviour of these thugs but to condemn USSR for illegally putting spies in our countries with the apparent purpose to assassinate our leaders and subvert our Republic form of government. We know that America is a great Democracy and will soon wake up to this Soviet trickery.

TB: Well, that's quite a mouthful. Some of the ladies in the staff wanted to know where you get those lovely overalls. (laughter) That reminds me of one of the questions I received from an intern here: Do you think that these attacks on you by the USSR and the Poles is motivated by an innate fear and hatred towards women.

FR: (taken aback and pauses before answering): Tim, I know that more than 50% of the world is female but I do not think Leader Sikorsky or Chairman Beria have this in mind. Look, speaking in due respect to you, Russia would dearly love the oil fields in Persia. They also want the world to fear them and the increasing freedoms in Babylon are a threat to them in the long run.

This is a simple land grab facillitated by a rise to power of one of the most dangerous men in the world. The world should knows this and weigh for themselves the consequences of Warsaw Pact controlling over 70% of the world's oil.

TB: With that word (wipes brow unconsciously), we'll leave it to be continued. Next, when we come back, we'll hear the Soviet response to President Rafsannjanni's very provacative and interesting proposals. But first, a word from our sponsor.

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[Metaliturtle]

hehe I did the commercial

[Samuel Johnson]

In CYPRUS

Camel waved the braille version of the transcript at his wife Juda - "I would have never taken her for a wartime leader."

In Moscow

"I want to know why we in the greatest country with the greatest military in earth have no way to stop these pernicious broadcasts from Iraq!," Beria screamed in the face of one of the USSR's most honored generals.

"Sir. We have noted this deficiency in the past to you and your predecessor but were always told the priorities were on building tanks and spaceships."

"Well, then fix it! Now!"

"Sir, the scientists that knew the most about our communications were sent by you to Siberia because you feared they would use these secrets against us. Most of them have died and the ones who have survived have little motivation to work for us anymore."

"That's why they call it forced labor. Decimate them and then see how motivated they are."

"Decimation,Sir? Of a bunch of scientists?"

"Do you question me, General? Every fourth one, I want them dead! Dead! Dead! Then get new scientists - why didn't you do that in the first place," he shrieked derisively.

"Sir, the Politboro makes the policy for the military. There wasn't another credible battlefield threat since America went isolationist... well, except for the ESU(European Socialist Union)."

The General continued. "Um, Sir, there's another thing."

"Yes, General." Beria smoothed his suit and sat down again.

"This electronic jamming capability. Um. They have it. We don't."

"What - who is they? Do you mean the Iraqis?"

"Sir, it will take us at least two years to develop this capability. Our plan is to put a big antenna on a tank and let it go into the middle of the battlefield to jam their communications. The problem is that it will jam ours as well. We need it to be highly directional. We know the technology - it just will take some time to put it out on the battlefield. We're working on this problem, Sir."

Beria sat there with his jaw open, speechless at the stupidity he was seeing in front of him. A decorated General, no less. Oh, he would be purged. Oh yes, a bullet in the head for this one.

"General," Beria hissed. "Speed it up. Whatever you need to do. I have no doubt that we can wipe these Babylonians out within months. Dismissed."

As the military advisor was leaving, he was almost bowled over by an enthusiastic young male secretary.

"Sir, sir. The U.N. Acting Secretary General is on the line."

"Oh, what does HE want now!!!???"

[Samuel Johnson]

Oops. I forgot to add that the character of Beria was developed first by Rotten99 in the SNESA thread. Thanks, Rotten, for letting me borrow him.

Sam

[civman2000]

wow you write fast did you have this written up a bit beforehand?

[Metaliturtle]

it's been up a few days now civman

[civman2000]

um, one day...5 olong segments in the 1st day is pretty quick

[Metaliturtle]

oh my bad (i haven't slept in like a week)

[Samuel Johnson]

The muse is a demanding b***h...

I've got some more tonight, some military stuff for once.

I just have to work out the science of the whole maneuver I dreamed up.

I did manage to get out yesterday, though, I'm happy to report.

Starting to get nervous about how to tie all the loose ends together. Saddam remains my most vexing character, then Beria. And I still have to have Fareeka go back to being evil. Are villians always the hardest?

[Samuel Johnson]

INTERLUDE: The Road To War Less Traveled

In the wake of the Babylonian announcement that the Iraqis would unilaterally withdraw from Greece, USSR Admiral Smirnov called a meeting in his Thessaloniki headquarters with the European Socialist Union (ESU) representatives and the Warsaw Pact liaisons.

He opened by saying, “Gentlemen, at your seat is a folder containing all the information you need to support the Babylonian withdrawal and handover ceremony. At the end of the ceremony, Babylonian Defense Minister Hussein will take down the flag and will leave with the final security detail – unmolested – shortly thereafter.” Smirnov looked reproachfully at the ESU contingent.

“The folder details the plan for the Soviet-ESU occupation of these territories. I want you all to take a look at it, first.”

The ESU General Vicktor Nanova, a martinet from Bulgaria who fought against the Soviets in WWII, immediately became incensed after reading the first page.

“Admiral with all due respect, it was my understanding that Athens would be governed by European Socialist forces, not Soviets. In fact, my leadership cannot support this plan. We thought that this was understood by the Soviets.”

The Admiral smiled. “We will be in charge of Athens and the Aegean Islands. We give you Crete. Didn’t Leader Sirkorksy tell you this? He made the deal. He was a bit drunk at the time, though. He also told me why he became a socialist, but I suppose that's a discussion for another time, yes?"

The General raged, “Stop evading, Admiral! That is not true. Show me this in writing! Sikorsky has said no such thing about Greece. In fact, he told me he looked forward to eating at one of his favorite restaurants in Athens. No, Admiral, you need to redo this plan. Polish and Bulgarian forces will occupy Athens. We have a battalion waiting in Corinth and they are already on the move.”

The Admiral sneered, “Surely, General, you have heard of the Spetsnaz, yes?” They were the Soviet elite forces and you did not mess with them. “They will be parachuting into Greece, near City Hall, in the early morning. The Babylonians do not know about this. Spetsnaz' orders are to arrest the Athens Mayor Madame Mercouri. The reason why is not of your concern. I would suggest that you stay out of the Spetsnaz’s way. General Sikorsky is invited to the city anytime. I will personally see to his security.”

Stony silence.

The Admiral continued. “The Spetsnaz will be followed by about 5000 of our infantry - they will be arriving by transport later that day. Check your folders – it is all there. You should call your troops back now.”

Nanova glared at the Admiral, picked up the folder and tore it in half. He shouted, “This will not happen. I will see to it.” And he left the room in a storm of torn paper and a flurry of ESU staff officers.

The Admiral joked, “Check the hat room and see that they did not steal any of our covers and coats again.”

The Russians laughed – they had gotten use to Nanova’s bellicosity over the past year. He would do nothing; he always backed down. The liaisons from the other Warsaw Pact countries, however, looked bit more concerned for they had rarely seen this side of the supposedly great Soviet-ESU partnership.