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World of Fire

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  • World of Fire

    Okay this is my first story so be nice Okay now I'm gonna start.

    I Alexander am writing this book so future Greeks could learn about their history before the Great Launch . I shall tell it exactly as I remeber it
    Chapter 1: Gunpowder

    " Sire we have made a momentus discovery!" Excalimed the Science Adviser, Miklus.

    " What now?" I sighed . " If it is another technology that has made one more of my wonders that my people toiled on I'm gonna kick your ass!"

    " No sire. " stated the Military Adviser, Davidius . " It is a technology that allows us to make a solid metal ball fire at very high speeds. The soldiers that are being equipped with this can stop Knights and even the dreaded Persian Immortals."

    "Excellent." I said gleefully. If it was one thing I hated more than obsolete wonders it was those damned cocky Persians. We had gone to war with them many times.

    The world was basically 2 camps one Persian, one Greek. The Greeks had the backing of Egypt, Rome, and France. The Persians had united with Germany, Babylon, and Russia. The 2 camps were often bickering but none wanted to go to war because no side could gain the advantage.

    " Get Gregoris and Maximus in here." Gregoris was the Foriegn Minister and Mazimus was the chief of resource production.

    " Sire I know what your going to ask." Stated Maximus. " And the answer is yes. Miklus approached me with the knowledge of this resource and we have ample quantities of it.'

    " I know that you want to trade this resource to Rome , Egypt, and France so I took the liberty of doing it."

    Excellent I thought Now the persians would be the ones quivering.

  • #2
    good so far, though many of those names are roman not greek

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    • #3
      anyone noticing a lot of new good writers popping up?? I hope they aren't aliases who are voting for their established name in the contest.
      First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
      Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...

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      • #4
        C'mon metaliturtle, give him some credit. Great story. But now we know were all the writers have been lately..............

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        • #5
          they arent aliases, they come from the new attention the contest is getting in the news!

          Comment


          • #6
            ok, that works for me, their avatars and opening lines are just looking similar and i'm a bit suspicious.
            First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
            Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...

            Comment


            • #7
              Chapter 2: The Field Tests

              " Hello Xerxes, Bismarck, Hammurabi, and Catherine." I said confidently because I knew why they were all here, they didn't. " I know that you are all uhmm aquinted with my collegeaus Caeser, Cleopatra, and Joan of Arc."

              " Cut the crap Alexander!" Bellowed Xerxes. " I was busy destroying a barbarian village when your ambassidor said to come to this blasted meeting. He said that this would be worth my while. Plus if you trying to ambush us I've got my Immortals with me."

              " Ahh, yes the Immortals." I said evilly. " As we all know the Persian Immortals have the highest attack in all the land. Able to destroy any unit kmown to mankind." Xerxes smiled proudly at this. " Until now."

              " What?!?! Are you telling me that Xerxes Immoratls can be defeated? " asked Bismarck worriedly. For his army was the weakest in the world relying mostly on Xerxes' Immortals.

              " Impossible! " said Catherine abashed.

              " Well to prove it to you. " I said excitedly. " Xerxes call down one of your Immortals. " Xerxes did so reluctantly. " Now my soldier here, we like to call him a Musketeer, will set up his weapon and the Immortal will charge. Now if the Immortal wins we will each give you 500 gold. " Xerxes was almost drooling at this. " However if we win you must give us each 1000 gold."

              " What?! " screamed Xerxes. But I cut him off.

              " If your so sure of your Immortal then whats the risk? " I said nastily.

              " Alright then. Cyprus [the name of the Immortal] charge!!!

              My muskteer shot 1 bullet in to the Immortal's head. The Immortal died disbeliving.

              At first Casear was looking shocked then over joyed. " I believe you all owe us 1000 gold. " he said. The other side was as white as ghosts.

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              • #8
                NOT PART OF STORY

                Feedback is apperciated. No I am not a different writer. If my writing sounds the same it is because I hover around and read good stories and adapt them to my needs. I'm like the Romans acuding to the history channel

                The Romans weren't inventers for the most part.. They just copied other people's ideas then adapted it to their needs.


                Plus cvman2000 I don't really know the difference between Greek or Roman.

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                • #9
                  The only greek guys i know irl are named nick and adam, but their last names are huge (Jiannacopolous)
                  First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
                  Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...

                  Comment


                  • #11
                    not bad at all, the 2nd part was even better

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                    • #12
                      Chapter 3: The Musketeer's Flaw


                      Xerxes was extremely worried. This new " musketeer " was posing a serious threat to Persia. Though Greece or any of it's allies had started any of the wars they were sure to want venege.

                      " Sir. I came as soon as I could. " said Abdul, head of intelligence.

                      " Abdul I'm worried, this musketeer is a problem. I need you to take your best men and find any flaw that you can come up with. I will pay you 1000 gold for this. "

                      2 months later at a musketeer training camp...

                      Abdul had devised an ingenuis plan. His troops would disguise themselves as Greek advisors to Alexander. They would then " inspect " the musketeers.

                      " Well boys here goes nothing " said Abdul as they entered. " I want to speak to the highest ranking man here. " said Abdul said in his best Greek.

                      " Well I'm second in command. " said a soldier. " Well there's always Johnlos. "

                      A man with several aides strode to Abdul.

                      " Yes, I'm in command here. What is it you want? " said General Johnlos.

                      " We're advisers to Alexander. Here to view the musketeers. Alexander is worried that there might be a flaw with them. " said Abdul.

                      The General was looking very uncomfortable.

                      " Uhmm can I talk to you alone? "

                      5 minutes later in the Generals private quarters...

                      " There is a flaw with the musketeers. " stated Johnlos worriedly. Abdul was trying to look shocked instead of so happy he would wet his pants.
                      " They the most powerful defenders ever. But on attack they are as good as an Archer. "


                      Xerxes was overjoyed with the news. However the Greeks had adapted their strategy for this [ according to the papers Abdul had taken from the General when he wasn't looking ] The wars that had been prevoiusly fought over 1 city due to the fact that once the city had been captured the other side would come back and take it, then the other side and so forth. The papers stated:

                      Since the musketeers can hold any city they will hold out until reinforcements can arrive. Also since cities only need 2 or 3 musketeers for adaquete defesnse once the production of that has been accomplished, production can be totally devoted to offensive production thus overwhelming the opposition.

                      The strategy was so good that Xerxes was worried it had come from Frankis Maximus. The greatest warrior/general ever. If Greece had enlisted his help Xerxes was in big trouble.

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                      • #13
                        Chapter 4: Frankis Maximus: The Plight of the World

                        Alexander was sweating hard. The sweat was coming down so fast it almost looked like someone had peed all over him. But he had good reason, for he was in the neogotions room of Frankis Maximus.

                        Frankis Maximus was as about as close to a god on this planet. He commanded respect from the lowest peasant to Alexander himself. But it was for good reason. He was the greatest warrior/ general ever.

                        For when god had made the earth he decided he would have a sort of moderator. That moderator would have an island with 1 city. But the city was so favored by god that it had every luxury, strategic, and consumable good. It turned out 1,000 shields, commerce, and food each year[turn]. God gave the moderator [Frankis Maximus] extrodaniary warrior and generalship skills. He could defeat an Immortal with a warrior on defense. However he would always seek the newest technology to make his forces even more deadly.

                        " Hello Alexander. " said Frankis curtly.

                        " [Gulp] Hello Frankis. " sqeaked Alexander.

                        " Okay I was never a man for pleasantrys. I get Gunpowder, you get a 20 turn spy network and military defense pact. Is that good enough? " sighed Frankis.

                        " What do you mean by "spy network " ? " croaked Alexander.

                        " Well when God created this world he gave me 1 free tech. It was espionage. That basically means I know every thing going on in this world. If your wife were to become pregent, I'd probalbly know about before you. " Alexander could almost see Xerxes sleeping then a sword coming out of nowhere. " God however made 1 stipulation, I can only kill in duels or combat. So I can't have my spies chop off Xerxes head for you. "

                        " Okay we have a deal. " sighed Alexander.

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