Tweet
This has already been posted in the C3CDG forum, but I thought it might be good here too. It's a short history of the war between my team Euphorica and our opponents Desolation Row. And it also signals the fact that I'm stepping back down from being Euphorica's turnplayer because of the birth of my son in a few days. 
Tales from the Front
By First Bard Rhothaerill
As presented to RhothSPIN Press
November 15, 1475bc
The mountains close around us and I begin to wonder at our resolve. We sit here day after day, facing the famed immortals of Desolation Row. Rocks pound into us by the hour, thrown across the chasm before us by the catapults wheeled up the treacherous mountain paths. We’ve been lucky as only a few of our men have been hit. But still we bide our time, as directed by the generals.
And all I can think of is the past…
It has been many seasons since our humanitarian effort began. For many thousands of years the poor people of Desolation Row have suffered from the lack of music in their lives. The music of Euphorica is a joy to behold, and has been freely distributed to all who ask for millennia. Daily our bards create new songs and new poetry to share with the world.
But it has not been shared with the wretched masses of Desolation Row. They silently call out to our very souls, entreating us to share our beloved music. Alas we cannot. The oppressive regime of the infamous first dictator Aqualung71 has pervaded the leadership of Desolation Row for all time.
They fear us, do the dictators. They fear what the joys of music will bring to their people. They fear that those same people will come to realize how wretched their lives truly are under the regime of Aqualung71’s descendants. They fear they will lose control of their land and their power and their gold. And those dictators are correct for once music enters the hearts and minds of the people, once it pervades into their very souls, the people will realize the sham perpetrated on them by their leaders. They will realize all that life has to offer for them and cast off the oppressive regime of the dictators for a more enlightened government.
Recognizing the threat that the music of Euphorica presented, the dictators of Desolation Row quickly began their plans to crush any chance of their people hearing the enlightenment music had to offer. Those dictators created the Immortals, fearsome warriors singlemindedly dedicated to stamping out all forms of joy and entertainment in their land.
We, the Bards of Euphorica could no longer sit back and peacefully attempt to give our gift of music and joy to the people of Desolation Row. It is almost a legend by now, one that my father passed on that story to me as his father passed on to him and so on up the line of the Bards of the Rhothaerill line. My great, great, great grandfather was there that fateful day all those decades ago when First Bard McMeadows, leader of Euphorica in the name of Bjorn Tzu, declared that our nation would actively enforce our dedication to the spread of music and joy into the lands of Desolation Row. First Bard McMeadows, perhaps our most respected and admired leader since Bjorn Tzu who led us to settle near the plains of AbbA and gave us the joy of music, with a tear in his eye spoke these lines, “My friends, we know not what the future will hold, but we do know this. The men and women of Desolation Row are barren inside. Their plight cries out to us with their need of music and poetry and joy. Through the efforts of their foul dictators they know not the beauty of music. Though these people do not know us, perhaps they do not even know how much they need our music, but we MUST help these people. We must give them joy in their lives again. The memory of our great founder Bjorn Tzu demands no less than action. We must cast off the passive attempts to bring music to these people that have gone in the past. We must defeat the corrupt military of their oppressive dictators, including the evil Immortal forces they have bred. Only then will our mission to bring joy and love be successful.”
Alas, not all went as planned.
A first-strike force, intended to disable the dictator’s supply of weapons for their accursed immortals, met their untimely demise at the hands of the horsemen of Desolation Row, becoming trapped between the opponents and the hills of Antioch behind them. It was a slaughter. The best and brightest voices of Euphorica, suddenly silenced. Many spoke of the capriciousness of the great god of luck, RNG; that perhaps he did not favor our effort. But First Bard McMeadows was undeterred. Perhaps our attempt at ending the war quickly by eliminating the supplies of the weapons for immortals ended in disaster. But we would return someday, with better trained and better equipped men and women, to continue the fight for the freedom and joy of the people of Desolation Row.
Since that day many centuries have passed. The descendants of those dictators of Desolation Row occasionally sent their forces to engage our own, perhaps to test our resolve, perhaps just because they are evil and do not care if their own forces are lost. All were turned away, defeated.
And then one day my own grandfather, First Bard at the time, declared that the waiting would be over. The great Euphoriscian Musical Invasion would once again continue as conceived all those years ago by First Bard McMeadows.
And here I am today. Our forces have made their way through the Musical Mountains between our two lands to this point across from the arrayed forces of Desolation Row. Will they attack us? We know not. Will we attack them? It remains to be seen. For soon I will step down as First Bard. My family has held the title of First Bard for three generations this time. But I am old and my children are young, too young to become First Bard. The title will pass to one of the other great families, perhaps a descendant of the royal McMeadows line once again. Perhaps he will replace the current generals of our Musical Invasion. I know not, only that my time is nigh approaching.
For soon I go to face that final frontier known only as Andy.
Tales from the Front
By First Bard Rhothaerill
As presented to RhothSPIN Press
November 15, 1475bc
The mountains close around us and I begin to wonder at our resolve. We sit here day after day, facing the famed immortals of Desolation Row. Rocks pound into us by the hour, thrown across the chasm before us by the catapults wheeled up the treacherous mountain paths. We’ve been lucky as only a few of our men have been hit. But still we bide our time, as directed by the generals.
And all I can think of is the past…
It has been many seasons since our humanitarian effort began. For many thousands of years the poor people of Desolation Row have suffered from the lack of music in their lives. The music of Euphorica is a joy to behold, and has been freely distributed to all who ask for millennia. Daily our bards create new songs and new poetry to share with the world.
But it has not been shared with the wretched masses of Desolation Row. They silently call out to our very souls, entreating us to share our beloved music. Alas we cannot. The oppressive regime of the infamous first dictator Aqualung71 has pervaded the leadership of Desolation Row for all time.
They fear us, do the dictators. They fear what the joys of music will bring to their people. They fear that those same people will come to realize how wretched their lives truly are under the regime of Aqualung71’s descendants. They fear they will lose control of their land and their power and their gold. And those dictators are correct for once music enters the hearts and minds of the people, once it pervades into their very souls, the people will realize the sham perpetrated on them by their leaders. They will realize all that life has to offer for them and cast off the oppressive regime of the dictators for a more enlightened government.
Recognizing the threat that the music of Euphorica presented, the dictators of Desolation Row quickly began their plans to crush any chance of their people hearing the enlightenment music had to offer. Those dictators created the Immortals, fearsome warriors singlemindedly dedicated to stamping out all forms of joy and entertainment in their land.
We, the Bards of Euphorica could no longer sit back and peacefully attempt to give our gift of music and joy to the people of Desolation Row. It is almost a legend by now, one that my father passed on that story to me as his father passed on to him and so on up the line of the Bards of the Rhothaerill line. My great, great, great grandfather was there that fateful day all those decades ago when First Bard McMeadows, leader of Euphorica in the name of Bjorn Tzu, declared that our nation would actively enforce our dedication to the spread of music and joy into the lands of Desolation Row. First Bard McMeadows, perhaps our most respected and admired leader since Bjorn Tzu who led us to settle near the plains of AbbA and gave us the joy of music, with a tear in his eye spoke these lines, “My friends, we know not what the future will hold, but we do know this. The men and women of Desolation Row are barren inside. Their plight cries out to us with their need of music and poetry and joy. Through the efforts of their foul dictators they know not the beauty of music. Though these people do not know us, perhaps they do not even know how much they need our music, but we MUST help these people. We must give them joy in their lives again. The memory of our great founder Bjorn Tzu demands no less than action. We must cast off the passive attempts to bring music to these people that have gone in the past. We must defeat the corrupt military of their oppressive dictators, including the evil Immortal forces they have bred. Only then will our mission to bring joy and love be successful.”
Alas, not all went as planned.
A first-strike force, intended to disable the dictator’s supply of weapons for their accursed immortals, met their untimely demise at the hands of the horsemen of Desolation Row, becoming trapped between the opponents and the hills of Antioch behind them. It was a slaughter. The best and brightest voices of Euphorica, suddenly silenced. Many spoke of the capriciousness of the great god of luck, RNG; that perhaps he did not favor our effort. But First Bard McMeadows was undeterred. Perhaps our attempt at ending the war quickly by eliminating the supplies of the weapons for immortals ended in disaster. But we would return someday, with better trained and better equipped men and women, to continue the fight for the freedom and joy of the people of Desolation Row.
Since that day many centuries have passed. The descendants of those dictators of Desolation Row occasionally sent their forces to engage our own, perhaps to test our resolve, perhaps just because they are evil and do not care if their own forces are lost. All were turned away, defeated.
And then one day my own grandfather, First Bard at the time, declared that the waiting would be over. The great Euphoriscian Musical Invasion would once again continue as conceived all those years ago by First Bard McMeadows.
And here I am today. Our forces have made their way through the Musical Mountains between our two lands to this point across from the arrayed forces of Desolation Row. Will they attack us? We know not. Will we attack them? It remains to be seen. For soon I will step down as First Bard. My family has held the title of First Bard for three generations this time. But I am old and my children are young, too young to become First Bard. The title will pass to one of the other great families, perhaps a descendant of the royal McMeadows line once again. Perhaps he will replace the current generals of our Musical Invasion. I know not, only that my time is nigh approaching.
For soon I go to face that final frontier known only as Andy.
more, we want more 
Comment