Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Flashes in Time

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Flashes in Time

    I have constantly been amazed by the stories that have been posted here. I have been inspired by the writings of ChrisiusMaximus, EastHaven I, Skilord, Prince Jason and many more. As such, here is my first attempt at a story. I hope you like it, and any feedback is highly appreciated.
    “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
    they said.” — President Clinton

  • #2
    Chapter 1: The Librarian

    Adolphus Gustavus, son of Gustav Adolphus stared out over the great city of Carthage, capital of the Carthaginian Empire. He stood on the uppermost balcony of the Great Library at Carthage, a bastion of learning for nearly 2,500 years. The Library had attracted the world’s greatest thinkers, generation after generation, allowing the Carthaginians to stay ahead of their fellow countries in most things technological. In fact, the proliferation of great minds had enabled them to often reverse engineer many of their competitors’ inventions and make them their own. When all the great thinkers were stumped or too busy contemplating the meaning of life (“2”), the Carthaginians hoodwinked their neighbors by offering shiny trinkets and obsolete weapons in exchange for whatever knowledge was needed.

    Adolphus knew all of this and a great deal more of course, because he was the Chief Librarian of the Great Library at Carthage. He was the 237th Chief Librarian (Librarians know these things), in the history of the Great Library. It had once been a hereditary position, but in 703 AD, the Chief Librarian and all of his family had been killed in a tragic fire that had destroyed hundreds of volumes of rare books. Many thinkers debated what was the larger loss: the librarian and his family or the rare books.

    After that great tragedy, the Chief Librarian was selected by a council of the Senior Librarians, based upon who was best suited for the position. As the position was no longer hereditary, over time individuals who were not born in Carthage or any part of the Carthaginian Empire for that matter were able to become Chief Librarian. Ever since he was a small boy, Adolphus had dreamed of becoming Chief Librarian of the Great Library. He had studied at the University of Berlin, in his native Germania, and had gone on to graduate studies at the famed University of Leptis Magna. After a decades of working his way through the highly structured Library staff, he had a ascended to the position of a Senior Librarian, and the only five years earlier, Chief Librarian. At 68 years old he had been one of the oldest to ascend to the position of Chief Librarian, and he was only the third German to attain the position.

    The focus of Adolphus’ gaze was a large platform on the outskirts of the city, barely visible to his eye. Given the great distance and the deterioration of his eyes at his advanced age, to say that the platform was large would be an understatement. It was without a doubt the largest construction project in the entire Carthaginian Empire. On that platform, rested the great Space Ship Hannibal, preparing for the epic journey to Alpha Centauri. The ship had been named for the heroic leader who had founded their nation and after whom all leaders of the Carthaginians had been named.

    Adolphus shifted his view to the city before him, and he could easily detect the signs of overcrowding and pollution that had driven the entire world to seek refuge in the stars. Skyscrapers blotted the skyline and a cloudy haze clung to many of the monstrous constructions. To tell the truth, although the Library was a rather tall building in its own right (numerous additions over the ages), and contained many balconies like the one Adolphus stood upon, only this one, outside his personal office, afforded him a view of the S.S. Hannibal.

    The city itself was in a frenzy as the launch of the Hannibal was only hours away, Carthage had won the space race decades earlier with the launch of the Jupiter Mission. That early jump on its rival nations allowed them to overcome the greater productive capacity of both the Egyptians and the Americans. Carthage would become the first to reach Alpha Centauri, but the Americans and Egyptians would certainly follow. However, Carthage would be the first and would be able to select the prime locations and therefore dominate Alpha Centauri much as they dominated Earth, perhaps even more completely.

    Adolphus thought about the oldest an most treasured book in the vaults of the Library, a rendering of the story describing the founding of the Carthaginians by Hannibal. He thought it appropriate that in the moment of Carthage’s greatest glory that he remember their humble beginnings, thousands of years earlier. The book itself was nearly a thousand years older than the library, and had been saved by the youngest son of the Chief Librarian in the great fire of 703. The son had died from a combination of smoke inhalation and third degree burns when he had broken from his mother’s arms and rushed back into the Library to save the book. The book was now far too fragile to touch and was preserved in a controlled environment, however many copies had been made and preserved. Not surprisingly, Adolphus had read and memorized the story as a child and he marveled at the great strides…
    “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
    they said.” — President Clinton

    Comment


    • #3
      Chapter 2/Part 1: The Leader (Some 6,000 years earlier)

      Malchus marveled at the great strides of Hannibal as he traversed the camp in search of the scoundrel responsible for letting the harvest of grapes rot. Malchus often found himself in awe of his friend and leader Hannibal. Hannibal’s size and strength often inspired loyalty from his fellow Carthaginians, but it was Hannibal’s intelligence that often impressed his friend Malchus. The Carthaginians were a nomadic people who roamed across the plains, through the forests and over the hills. They would stop for no more than a season if the mood struck them, but no more than that. Hannibal’s newest idea was to turn their people from their nomadic ways to those of a stationary and sedentary people. He thought that Hannibal was crazy to attempt such a thing, but he was loyal to his friend and he was willing to follow him in anything he did. He couldn’t wait to hear how Hannibal was going to convince the nomadic Carthaginian people to settle down. Malchus decided to run after his friend and see how he was going to deal with the wayward youth who let the grapes spoil.

      “Hey, Hannibal. Wait up.” Malchus yelled as he chased after his friend. “I wouldn’t miss this for all the tea in China.” Hannibal slowed his stride marginally, but just enough so his friend could catch him without running a full out sprint.

      By the time Malchus caught up with Hannibal he was nearly out of breath and Hannibal was nearly to the tent of the wayward youth he was searching for.

      “Thanks for waiting,” Malchus complained good-naturedly. A grunt was the only response he got from his taciturn friend. “What do you plan to do to Marcius?”

      “Actually, nothing. I’m pretty sure by now that he has heard from others that I’m here to tear his hide apart, and his imagination is far more creative than mine. After I scream at him a little, and promise to throw him out of the tribe if he screws up again, I’m sure he’ll be more concerned with tending to his duties than drawing pictures.” Hannibal gave a wan smile as he headed for the tent.

      “Marcius!” Hannibal yelled as he barged through the tent flap of the young artist. The young man was cowering on the floor on the far side of the tent.

      “Please, don’t hurt me,” whined the young man as he groveled on the floor.

      “Hurt you. You think I’m going to hurt you?” Hannibal asked incredulously. Malchus found it hard to keep a straight face at the degree of sincerity in his friend’s voice. “When I’m through with you, you are going to wish that I had hurt you. You need to learn a little responsibility, and the first step towards that goal is by having you clean up after the animals for a few weeks. That’ll keep you too busy to find time to draw pictures when you should be working. If you do that well, I may have a use for those artistic talents of yours.”

      “Oh, thank you. Thank you. You are too kind.” Marcius continued to whimper, although he was obviously relieved..

      “Cut it out. Don’t make me change my mind and order you whipped.” Hannibal muttered disgustedly as he turned and stormed out of the tent.

      Once again Malchus found himself hurrying to catch up. “That was certainly anti-climatic, but I think you’re right. He will certainly think twice before shirking his duties again, and at the same time he will be grateful that you didn’t thrash him. I don’t know how you do it, I would have just beaten him to a pulp and expected that to do the job. Everyone know you are capable of it, and at times you’ve had to use violence, but you seem to be far more effective without it.”

      “I don’t like violence, Malchus. I use it when I must, but if I think I can avoid it I will. That I have proven my skill in battle only helps me to avoid violence because most people would rather not test me. I play on that to get most people to do what I want. However, I don’t think I’ll be able to do that with the whole tribe tonight.” Hannibal sighed as he thought of the speech he planned on making at the meeting tonight.
      Last edited by Paulypav; May 29, 2003, 22:33.
      “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
      they said.” — President Clinton

      Comment


      • #4
        The rest of Chapter 2 will come later, I haven't exactly written it yet, so you'll have to be patient. There will be a lot of dialogue and I'm not very confident with dialogue. I hope you all like the story.
        “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
        they said.” — President Clinton

        Comment


        • #5
          I'm impressed.

          No, really, I am. It's pretty good and your dialouge isn't half bad at all, so feel confident.

          :thumbsup: to you. Keep it up.
          Read Blessed be the Peacemakers | Read Political Freedom | Read Pax Germania: A Story of Redemption | Read Unrelated Matters | Read Stains of Blood and Ash | Read Ripper: A Glimpse into the Life of Gen. Jack Sterling | Read Deutschland Erwachte! | Read The Best Friend | Read A Mothers Day Poem | Read Deliver us From Evil | Read The Promised Land

          Comment


          • #6
            Great start, glad to see you take the plunge and start a story.
            A proud member of the "Apolyton Story Writers Guild".There are many great stories at the Civ 3 stories forum, do yourself a favour and visit the forum. Lose yourself in one of many epic tales and be inspired to write yourself, as I was.

            Comment


            • #7
              Very good, especially being your first. Keep it coming!
              "The Pershing Gulf War began when Satan Husane invaided Kiwi and Sandy Arabia. This was an act of premedication."
              Read the Story ofLa Grande Nation , Sieg oder Tod and others, in the Stories Forum

              Comment


              • #8
                Thanks for the feedback. I'm hoping to have the next section up sometime tommorrow, but I've been a little busy. It's about 3/4 written.
                “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                they said.” — President Clinton

                Comment


                • #9
                  Not bad, not good either.

                  Just joking, its a fine start. Keep the goods coming or we'll try to make you sedentary.
                  Here is an interesting scenario to check out. The Vietnam war is cool.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I hope to get something typed up later tonight, although its gotten rather larger than I expected. I had some time to write in class today. The professor was going over stuff I had already done before so it was a good time to get some writing done.
                    “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                    they said.” — President Clinton

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Nice start! I can't wait to see how this one turns out!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Chapter 2 Part II – The Meeting (That Evening)

                        A hush settled over the assembled crowd of village elders, parents, young adults and children as Hannibal stepped upon the rock that had been settled upon as the best spot from which to speak. There were approximately 700 men, women, and children assembled out of the 2,000 or so tribe members. As with any group there some who were not interested in listening to speeches, but the bulk of those missing were attending to other valuable tasks, including attending their families, and those hunting for the tribe or protecting the outskirts of the tribe’s camp. Of course, just about everyone consider to be important was in attendance. Sitting in places of honor at the front of the assemblage were the tribe’s elders, as well as the elders of the four other Carthaginian tribes. While in theory, the five tribes were autonomous; Hannibal was looked to as the nominal leader of them all.

                        Hannibal gazed out upon the gathered throng and took a deep breath to calm himself. He didn’t mind addressing large crowds, although he once had been, but years of practice had eased any nervousness that he had once felt. However, the magnitude of what he was about to say caused him a great deal more nervousness than he had felt in some time. Once he steadied himself he began:

                        “Esteemed Elders, Brothers, Sisters, Sons and Daughters, for I consider you all part of my family, thank you for coming. I have asked all of you including our brothers and sisters from our fellow tribes because I feel that we have come to a critical point in our lives.” Hannibal paused briefly to allow that thought to sink in. “For hundreds of years our people have traveled the plains, living off the land, gathering fruits, berries and other edible foods, and hunting the herds of buffalo and deer. However, as our people have grown more numerous the herds have thinned and it becomes hard to gather enough food from what grows naturally to survive. We are proud of our nomadic heritage, our ability, our freedom to pack up and move whenever and wherever we choose. We have mocked and jeered our brethren who have forsaken the life of the road and chosen one place to live. But remember, they too survive just as we survive. Their ways may be different, but they do work, and they may work for us.” Some members of the crowd jeered and hissed his words, but Hannibal continued. “In fact, I do not believe that we can survive as a people roaming freely across the plains. We have simply grown too large for that way of life to remain successful.”

                        At this declaration there was a much larger chorus of boos and hisses, spattered with applause, although most of those who clapped were stared down by their neighbors or elbowed roughly in the ribs. Then the shouts began:

                        “You’re crazy!”

                        “I’ll never live in one place!”

                        “Have you been smoking the peace pipe?”

                        “But we’ll starve.”

                        “How will we protect ourselves?”

                        “I’m not a stinking farmer!”

                        Hannibal stood there and absorbed the assorted complaints and insults, for it was nothing that he had not expected. The Carthaginians were a proud people and not overly willing to change, but change they must if they were to survive. What heartened him greatly was that none of the elders had joined in with the protest, although based on their reactions and the huddled whispering there was sure to be some objections. Again not unanticipated. Some of the elders looked as if they had just bitten a lemon, a feeling not unlike his own feelings when he had first grasped the idea. Hannibal had a grander view of the way life in the tribe was going and it was clear to him that they could not survive living free on the plains, smaller groups would continue to exist, but some large groups needed to settle down.

                        Hannibal sensed his friend Malchus moving up protectively behind him, and he motioned him back although he appreciated the gesture. He then held his hands up in a supplicating gesture asking for silence. The muttering and shouts continued for a moment or two longer and then died down.

                        “Please let me address your concerns, those that I could hear, but as I am only one man, I can only address one problem at a time. Many of you are concerned about feeding ourselves if we settle down, but is for just that reason I feel we must settle down. Are there not many people who live in one place and do not starve? Do they not grow crops for themselves? Do we not trade our goods for some of their food?” Hannibal paused and looked out at the crowd. He spied Janus, the tanner, with his hand raised patiently waiting to be noticed (right on schedule, Hannibal noted). “Yes, my brother. What troubles you?”

                        Janus spoke with great concern, “A farmer can grow crops enough to feed himself and his family, and still have some to trade. But there are many, many more of us, not just a farmer and his family. How can we survive on just one farm?”

                        Hannibal smiled, Janus’ performance was perfect. He was glad that he had approached the venerable tanner ahead of time and asked him to set up the response Hannibal needed to make. “Since we are many people, we must have many farms, larger farms, with many farmers. The grass grows green and long across most of the plains, why wouldn’t corn and wheat grow just as well?”

                        “What about droughts?” Shouted a voice from the crowd.

                        “What about them?” Hannibal asked rhetorically. “If we pick the proper location, one near a water source, like a lake or a river, a drought will not be that bad. We will be able to irrigate our crops and only in extreme cases will a river or lake dry up, if a drought is that bad we would be hurt just as much living freely on the plains as we would in a settlement. I believe that we can grow more than enough crops to supplement our diet of meat that we will continue to acquire with the help of our hunters.

                        “However, I believe that we should also gather many of the buffalo and cattle that gather on the plains and guide them near to wherever we choose to live. It is an idea for the future for there are few buffalo or cattle that will allow a man to force them where to go. At the very least we can set up camps nearby the herds that can keep tabs on the herd, gathering some for meat and hides.” Hannibal could see many people talking animatedly among themselves, seeing how food might not be a problem, but there were still more problems to be addressed before the people would support him.

                        “I know that many of you are worried about our safety if we stay in one place, where our enemies, few that they may be can easily find us. If all five tribes are gathered together who would be willing to attack a group of our size. What warriors among you plan on putting down your swords?” The hisses he got from the warriors among the crowd were all the response he needed. We will still need men to fight and protect us just as we always have. I do not think that we need fear our enemies, for we will grow strong as we grow.”

                        At this point, Hannibal noticed a burly warrior pushing his way to the front of the crowd. When he reached the front he asked, well more like stated “Why should we chain ourselves to one place? Always have we traveled the plains like the birds through the sky, free and unfettered. We value freedom and we always have, if we settle in one place that freedom will be lost and we will be tied to the land. I for one greatly value being able to pick up and move whenever I choose.” The good feeling that had been growing throughout the crowd disappeared and much of the previous discord returned, albeit diminished from its height. This was the point that Hannibal needed to win, if he was to convince them to change their lives in order to save themselves. Solid, tangible things like food and shelter were easy to convince the people about for the methods to assuage their fears existed. But an intangible concept like freedom, that was hard to argue especially when what you asked your people to do appeared to be asking them to give up that freedom.”

                        “Honored warrior, you speak of the bird and its freedom, the eagle soaring through the air, the sparrow flitting from tree to tree. Does not the eagle have its aerie, the sparrow its nest, so must we have a home to return to. We need not spend all of our time in our settlement, like the hen on her nest protecting her eggs, but we can leave our ‘nest’ soaring about the plains, but at night, or after many nights we will have a nest to return to. Even better than the eagle or the sparrow our fellow Carthaginians will be protecting our nests so that the weasel cannot enter and steal our eggs.

                        “Just because you choose to join a settled community does not mean that you must remain there at all times. Will we not need warriors to protect our lands roaming the countryside looking for enemies? Will we not need hunters to bring us meat? Will we not need trappers to find us furs? Will we not need scouts to explore the land? In that way can you be part of our settled community and still travel about the land living the life that we all live now, but cannot continue to live we wish to survive.”

                        The warrior looked much relieved, “I had not thought of it in that way. Let me be one of the first to volunteer to be a warrior to protect our new settlement if that is what must be. I mourn the loss of freedom to those of my brothers who will live in the villages, but I see the need and will protect them to the best of my ability.” He bent to one knee and held his hand to his heart. “Hail, Hannibal my liege.”

                        At this, there was much muttering among the tribal elders, Hannibal turned to address them. “My brothers, there is something that is troubling you can I help address your fears?”

                        An elderly man stepped forward “To be blunt, who do you intend to have rule this settlement?”

                        “I do not see why our current arrangement needs to change. Why cannot we all work together to run the community?” Hannibal hoped that this would fall apart because of petty jealousies.

                        “It appears to us that you plan to grab all of the power for yourself.” Many in the crowd cried out to protest the comment and the tone with which it was stated, although many others shouted out Hannibal’s name to show their support for such an idea. “You are the one with all the answers and so all the people will look to you as their savior.”

                        “It is not my intention to seize power, it is to save our people. I will gladly step aside and let anyone else lead our people if they can lead them to salvation. This is far bigger than any one man.”

                        It was in that moment that Hannibal truly endeared himself to the people, for he showed he was willing to sacrifice power in order to save his people. The elders were mostly satisfied that Hannibal was not looking to take power for himself, and after a few more procedural questions they agreed to bring the idea back to their own tribes.

                        The tribe itself met for several more hours that night and on many nights after that where they continued to discuss the merits of the idea. Hannibal and his staunchest supporters were everywhere answering questions and receiving suggestions that were often incorporated into their plans. Over time it became generally accepted by the members of Hannibal’s tribe that they would find a place to settle and the discussions turned from the merits of settling to where they should settle.

                        Within a few months, representatives of each of the other four tribes contacted Hannibal’s tribe announcing their intention to join Hannibal’s tribe in forming a permanent community. After much hand-wringing and argument over suitable locations a site for the town of Carthage was selected. Near a bend in the Apollus River, and within a few miles of what would become known as the Iron Hills, in the middle of a vast grassland and within reach of a small forest was formed the town that would one day become the site of perhaps man’s most important event…
                        “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                        they said.” — President Clinton

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Wow, can't believe that parts finished. It's probably lacking a little blood and guts for the war-mongers among you, but rest assured there will be some in this story.
                          “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                          they said.” — President Clinton

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            ...Adolphus snapped back to the present. He had a rare gift among people, his imagination was so vivid that he practically experienced the stories that he had read, none more vividly than the story that he knew best, the founding of Carthage. From the founding of a civilization to the launch of a planet saving expedition had not been a breeze. Adolphus remembered the first meetings of the Carthaginians with the French and the disastrous repercussions it had on both nations in their infancy. In fact, the great historian Livius had written a stirring peace on the early encounters between the two civilizations…
                            “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                            they said.” — President Clinton

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              So a really long section followed by a much shorter section. For any who are confused by the flashback to our librarian, I plan to use him as an introduction to a collection of events in the history of the Carthaginian Empire, of which I will only tell a small part. If there are any particular stories that anyone would like to see done in more detail, or more importantly since I have to write them, that I would like to see in more detail, I will probably do so in a new story thread. Enjoy and thanks for reading. Once again feedback is highly appreciated.
                              “The American people have now spoken, but it’s going to take a little while to determine exactly what
                              they said.” — President Clinton

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X