Crazy things the AI has done or said

[Egyptian]

I had to laugh yesterday during a game on Regent level. I was most of the way through the Anciet Age, and everyone (eight civs/standard map) had standing armies. I check my military advisor and he tells me that the best unit the Babylonians have is "worker." I've seen some funny stuff playing civ3, but this one made me laugh. What are some of the funny things you've seen, or stupid stuff your advisors or other civ leaders have told you?

[randommushroom]

Whatever you do, don't grant the Babs right of passage. They'll come in and turn your civ into a giant forest.

[bigvic]

"Ghandi is a known cheat and liar. I don't think we should trust him." diplomacy screen Think about that out of the context of the game.

"The russians are burning our homes, taking our women, stealing our cattle! Think of the cattle!" Approximate Shaka Zulu quote shortly before his destruction by the rampaging Russians.

[notyoueither]

Originally posted by bigvic
"The russians are burning our homes, taking our women, stealing our cattle! Think of the cattle!" Approximate Shaka Zulu quote shortly before his destruction by the rampaging Russians.

I'll have to pay more attention to those dialogue boxes.

[PatLasch]

Well, I think that Alexander looks stoned, so I think he must be hallucinating or something when he calls my civ puny.

[Inverse Icarus]

i just went through the diplomacy.txt for some funny ones.

"You self-delusional egomaniac! You sneak-attacked us when we had such an agreement before, and now you expect us to sign another one? Forget it!"

"If any of your troops set foot on $CIVADJ3 soil we will kill them. We remember what you did to us the last time we had this treaty, $PLAYER0!"

"I'll happily give you a right of passage agreement - to hell! I remember what you did to us when we had such an agreement before, and I won't let you betray us again!"

"$PLAYER0, the troops bumbling about near $CITY3 are stealing chickens and annoying our women. Remove them, please."

(didn't that used to say raping?)

"There you are. I suppose you wish to extend our peace treaty, do you? Well, we are feeling PARTICULARLY merciful today, so why the heck not?"

[Pyrodrew]

Originally posted by UberKruX
"$PLAYER0, the troops bumbling about near $CITY3 are stealing chickens and annoying our women. Remove them, please."

(didn't that used to say raping?)

Yes it did! I have the 1st version that came before any patches below...

"$PLAYER0, the troops bumbling about near $CITY3 are raping our chickens and annoying our women. Remove them, please."

[Inverse Icarus]

[DTRY]

Originally posted by bigvic
"Ghandi is a known cheat and liar. I don't think we should trust him." diplomacy screen Think about that out of the context of the game.

Many people find Ghandi untrustworthy. Read the topic "Back stabbing AI" for more information. I'll blame the developers on this one.


About funny stuffs, I'm playing the Indian right now. While I was having a war with the Japanese, when I contact Tokugawa he said "All your base are belong to us".

[bigvic]

Also for a few yucks, check out the thread, if its still up, "What is that thing?' Probably way down on the list by now. Also, what's the deal w/ the diplomacy guy when they enter the industrial age? Everybody else dresses appropriately, but he looks like he's wearing someone's curtains or a flapper outfit from the twenties. Can anyone enlighten me, or is this some Sid bizarro humor? Finally, check out how I got Gramphos' attention on the files forum, on the last or second to last page.

[bigvic]

Originally posted by DTRY
Many people find Ghandi untrustworthy. Read the topic "Back stabbing AI" for more information. I'll blame the developers on this one.


About funny stuffs, I'm playing the Indian right now. While I was having a war with the Japanese, when I contact Tokukawa he said "All your base are belong to us".

Yeah, Ghandi is a sneaky SOB! I can swear he simpers around pretending to be Mr. Goody Goody all the time plotting your destruction, usually by paying off dupes to hit you. Maybe I'm giving the AI to much credit. Of couse I am. Aren't I?

[Ribannah]

Originally posted by randommushroom
Whatever you do, don't grant the Babs right of passage. They'll come in and turn your civ into a giant forest.

Hmmm, in the game I'm playing (CivFanatics GOTM) the Babs are roading the forests I already have.
This while the territory around the city of Babylon is still void of any tile improvements in 300 AD.

[Playa del Carmen]

Once after a particularlly humilitating war for Cathrine the Great (I was Germany, and they declared war on me for no reason, so I almost completely decimated them ) I tried to trade maps with them a long time after we'd made peace and she called me a "...jumped up little fool..."

[Saurus]

Originally posted by randommushroom
Whatever you do, don't grant the Babs right of passage. They'll come in and turn your civ into a giant forest.

Argh...don´t even mention those animals.
For some reason I seem to ALWAYS end up with the
babs being my neighbours.
They are terrible...
They can newer be trusted...they break treaties
whitout hesitation - always. I hate them - I hate them - I hate them soooo very much. They have spoiled so very many games by
killing me before the middle ages. No matter how much
I try to bribe them....they take my money...and then they
attack me ANYWAY just 3 turns later. And there is no way
the babs special unit can be stopped early on as it is both
strong and cheap.

Even seeing those red-colored borders of that Hammurabi-snake makes me sick...

-Saurus

[notyoueither]

Saurus. Give Hammi a good dose of Legions or Immortals or MountedWarriors.

BTW. Red coloured? Are you sure that's not Caesar?