The Marketplace

[History Guy]

ANNOUNCEMENT:

I, Hernan de History Guy Calamari the Younger, have made arrangements concerning Togas' cattle decision. We have decided not to act as he ordered, but instead improvise for the better.

We will present to the Great Despot 1/4 of all our heads of cattle, to be his for whatever use he intends for them. This is out of our own free will, and may even be considered foolish by some certain unscrupulous business rivals. However, it is our decision. The Great Despot is our glorious leader, and we wish to impress upon him our loyalty to him.

We do hope that this act of generosity will not go unnoticed by His Excellency.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari the Younger

[mrmitchell]

Originally posted by History Guy
and may even be considered foolish by some certain unscrupulous business rivals.

What unscrupulous business rivals? I do not know what you are talking about!

Actually, I'm quite proud that you are donating so many of your cattle to our fine government.

As an inspired announcement here myself, whenever the Spanish Army or Explorers needs clothing, they will get it with 3 out of 4 bones off the price. So if they order, say, 3 robes for 100 warriors, that's 300 bones normally, but with this discount is only 75 bones. A great reduction of the price!!! (OOC: How many warriors would one warrior unit represent?)

[History Guy]

A NEW BUSINESS:

Sancho History Guy Calamari, the youngest son of Hernan the Elder, is opening a new business in the Marketplace. His words at the dedication (to his soon to be late father...) were: "This new business is, like the business founded by Grandpa, revolutionary.

"I am founding offices for myself, Sancho Calamari, Private Investigator. Working with the law, I will, for a modest price, do my best to find solutions to all your mysteries, large (Your brother was murdered? Think it was the Mitchells?) or small (Lost a chicken? Think the Mitchells stole it?), whether the crime has anything to do with the Mitchells or not. Especially not. I shall, every time, find the solution and the answer, with no confusion!

"What do you stand to lose? Hire me to solve the crime today!"

So, please, do try and accomodate my enterprising brother. He has something he calls a 'shard of glass to look through', and so he believes himself to be able to solve any cases. He's probably right.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari II
Squid and Cattle Baron

[pikesfan]

Señor Sancho, could you find my lost puppy? He is black with a white spot on his tail. I don’t have any money at all. I’m only 7. But I’ve got a big round piece of wood I found you can look through. Can I see your glass? Look, the wood is round and the glass is round too!

little Elena Pikesfan
little sister to Maria and Anna Pikesfan

[History Guy]

Elena, here is your puppy. He was over by the marketplace, a-hungrily eyeing some squid, which I bought for him. He enjoyed it. However, he appears to have been at the trashdump for some time, as you can tell. I have taken the liberty of giving him a bath...As for payment, I will accept none for this problem. Thank you for coming to me, my first client.

(Man. When is someone going to get the knife around here so as I can investigate?!)

Sancho History Guy Calamari
Private I

[Nuclear Winter]

[Nuclearis Winterius the II]
Sancho, I urge you, find the murderer of my good brother Henrique Winterius, found dead near a huge hill. At first i tought he may have fallen, but there was a stone over his back! A huge stone! that would be understandable if it was on a mountain, but our hills don´t even have boulders!For the sake of my old father, find him so that justice may be achieved!

[mrmitchell]

Originally posted by History Guy
large (Your brother was murdered? Think it was the Mitchells?) or small (Lost a chicken? Think the Mitchells stole it?), whether the crime has anything to do with the Mitchells or not.

Senor Calamari II, you're supposed to make your personal hatred toward other families less obvious. Then again, now that it is known, every crime that you proclaim we have committed will of course only now be investigated even more deeply, revealing whatever true perpetrator it is to commit such an act.

Spamish Mitchell
I did NOT murder your brother and I did NOT steal your chicken!

[pikesfan]

Would you like your daughter to be a wife that is an ornament to the household? Then send her to Madame JoaquÃna Pikesfan’s School of Etiquette. There she will learn:

how to eat squid properly
the proper way of behaving around notables
the nicest way to dress within your husband’s income
how to civilize your husband and get him to go to the Tavern for only one or two drinks and not come home roaring drunk.

JoaquÃna Pikesfan learned these secrets from the wise women of Los Piraneos and became so accomplished in them that she was granted the honourable title of Madame, which means Mistress of Etiquette. Now she wants to pass them on to you.

Consultations are held at the house of Jordà Pikesfan.

[History Guy]

Senor Pikesfan, I'm sending my soon-to-be wed daughter for instruction at your school.

Senor Winterius, my brother says: "Fill me in with the facts. Was he on the hill for a reason? Are there any clues of note? I caught a big professional hit man crawling around the area by the name of Francesco Fall Guy, who I am holding in custody for torture and interrogation. What clues have you? I shall take on this case with all my deductive powers!"

Senor Mitchell, I would not have phrased the advertisement thus, but you are responsible for the soon-to-be murder of my father, and thus my brother Sancho has a very intense hatred of your family. He does not let that in his way, however, nor ever would he. He will be fair to you at all times, unless he finds evidence against you. Senor Pikesfan has died at your hand and my father shall soon also, and so naturally you are the number one suspect. Where it not for your being such a big crime boss, we'd have hauled you to the gallows long ago. However, you are an old man with a very weak heart, and so we have been merciful.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari II
Madrid's Only Squid Baron

[Nuclear Winter]

Before he went to the hill, he said that he was to solve a very long lasting family problem trough diplomacy, so he was very happy. Before this, he had been talking to many people around here in the marketplace, and he was also talking with his fiancé about marrying.
they were going to marry tomorrow...
Pardon me for the tears,
Nuclearis Winterius the I

[History Guy]

I spoke to Floris, who says that Henrique stopped in on the way to the hill, and said about the same thing. Also, he gave the last intial of the man he was going to meet while speaking to Floris. He said, "Hello Mr. O, I'm off to speak to Mr. M of his tribe at the hill. I'm going to try to settle this argument through diplomacy, and I'm sure I'll succeed!" He was very cheerful. I understand the tears. It is very sad, indeed. I am not working out which tribal leader he might have been meeting with a last name starting with M. There's only a short list here...

Sancho History Guy Calamari
Private Eye

[mrmitchell]

Originally posted by History Guy
Where it not for your being such a big crime boss, we'd have hauled you to the gallows long ago. However, you are an old man with a very weak heart, and so we have been merciful.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari II
Madrid's Only Squid Baron

How could I be a crime boss? The only person in my entire clan capable of beating up any of you lugs was Thug, and his departure is due none other than to the Calamaris. I do not let personal affairs get into my business.

[History Guy]

Thug? Thug disappeared mysteriously. His remains could not be identified, convienently, because he was struck by a bolt of lightning. As for the fingers...Ronni Pikesfan, a man who died at your hands, was buried with a strange lack of those same fingers...odd that. Almost leads one to suspect that...

[ooc] I'd like to go to the chatroom, but unfortunately Markos seems to have changed it. We used to have a room that I could get into...but now... [/ooc]

Sancho History Guy Calamari

[Hot Mustard]

Ahh, the good ol' days.

[History Guy]

Ah, the days of squid and roses. Wait, I just said that somewhere else...