Official GS Propaganda Outlet

[Master Zen]

GS: the first empire in the history of Civ poised to nuke itself...

[Theseus]

Actually, a loooong time ago, when I first started playing C3 (beginning 2002?), I had a string of games where I got my ASS KICKED by strong AI civs... in one of the first games that I played to the Modern Age, I was in the unenviable position of not having rubber or oil, so I was fending off Tanks, MIs, and MAs with friggin' Infantry and Arty. But then, I had the only uranium!! I had to nuke an enemy SoD, either French or German, I forget, ON MY OWN SOIL.

I lost anyway.

[Aeson]

Originally posted by DeepO
BTW, shouldn't multiple members need a launch key, so that we can keep you from launching on your own? I always liked Hurricane, somehow the voters there were always cheering whenever I visited the city

No worries DeepO. I'll be sending you a launch key on the tip of the first warhead produced. In the meantime I appoint you Governor of Hurricane. Your adoring electorate awaits you.

[DeepO]

T, I once did the same thing, I think in my first or second deity game. I also lost... I had plenty of tanks and stuff, but smooth talking the AIs somehow didn't work anymore.

Oh, and in one of the Alamo runs, I nuked the AI stacks, close enough to damage my own fortresses. That worked though

DeepO

[DeepO]

Originally posted by Aeson
No worries DeepO. I'll be sending you a launch key on the tip of the first warhead produced. In the meantime I appoint you Governor of Hurricane. Your adoring electorate awaits you.

Thanks!

DeepO

[Aeson]

Bumper Pumpkin Crop!
GS all-in Patches.


The great Pumpkin Patch as photographed from high altitude weather balloon.

Monsoon, GS (OrangeNews) - "Blessings from the Heavens" sounds the call of the NW Stormian Farmer's Association. Just a few weeks ago their membership had met to discuss the impact of the recent frosty weather crossing the channel from Bob. Now, thanks to extreme increases in temperatures, not only will the harvest be saved, but has come 6 months early!

What meteorologists are now calling "Mushroom Storms" have been popping up across the countryside. At first, their impact was horrific. All folliage and structures were destroyed by their wrath. But in their wake a huge pumpkin patch has been left behind, spreading at an unprecidented rate. Halloween and Thanksgiving have been tentatively re-schedualed for June 11th and July 3rd respectively. As NYE, the Minister of Hollidays and Firearms, noted at a recent press conference, "If we wait any longer than that, these jack's won't be welcoming our kids to strangers doorsteps, or making very good pies either." Then NYE, brandishing an AK-47 and wearing a vintage President Barclay mask, continued, "Trick or Treat?" After learning that no candy was to be had, the esteemed minister graciously accepted purses and wallets in leu of sugary treats from the gathered reporters.

Things aren't all rosey (or more precisely, orangey) in the NW though. Reports are filtering in of strange abnormalities since the mushroom storms first hit. Most of the locals complain of high pitched wailing emminating from the patches at night. One of our camera men claims a rogue pumpkin tried "humping my leg". And a boy in tattered rags, crying on a street-corner, wails, "Papa, they ate my Papa!"

President Aeson, having been last seen leaving a Software Ect. with a new copy of Everquest, has yet to make a public address on the issue. Orange House staff have been firm on their "The President is currently unavailable for comment" stance, but our sources say he is "Camping Vox". Citizens of GS are all very worried that Aeson may have fled the country. "We are working to extradict the President from Vox. He must pay for his crimes against our people!" says DeepO, Governor of Hurricane. "There is widespread suspicion that Aeson was in cahoots with GoW to initiate the attacks on Stormia. All we have are his publicly declared plans for the invasion of Hurricane, but that's enough evidence for me."

Minister of the Massage Parlor Candi disagreed, "Aeson is so sexy, don't you think?", until she was notified of the President's presumed flight, to which she replied, "Aeson must be extradicted from Vox, he must pay for his massages from our people!"

[Aeson]

GS Outraged at Wedding
Vows to triumph over acronyms with anagrams.

Borcem, NGoDW (OrangeNews) - An unruley crowd protested outside the UN while ND and GoW were joined together. Some were protesting because they hadn't been invited. Some because there were a few really hot Spanish lasses picketting the destruction and occupation of Es(tonia)pania. Others, like Cort Haus, Stormian Ambassador to both ND and GoW, were there hoping the invitation had just been lost in the mail. "When I was informed the invitation hadn't been sent out in the post intentionally, well then I went postal!" He added, "I didn't expect to be best man or give away the bride, but surely I deserve to be an usher at least?"

The crowd dispersed shortly after the wedding was concluded as airraid sirens were heard. No known Stormian bombing raids were schedualed at the time, and Borcem is out of range of even the longest range bombers, so this was probably just an elaborate ruse to break up the protests. No comment from the UN about the occurance was forthcoming.

Overseas in Stormia, the reaction of protest was much the same, but for different reasons altogether. alva, head of the Stormian Department of Acronyms and Anagrams, was disgusted at the lack of creativity shown by simply mashing the letters of GoW and ND together in such a haphazzard fashion. He stated, "Given the circumstances, we feel GoWND would be a much better acronym. I could see the phrase "I can't believe she was GoWND in white. *derisive snickering*" being tossed around quite a bit at the reception, but NGoWD, it's so gutteral and primitive that it can't be used in high society to any effect whatsoever. What are they, cave men?" He concluded, "Besides, we all know who is leading who around in this arrangement..."

alva's department has been working feverishly to determine what, if any, meanings can be derived from the combination of Glory of War and Neu Demogryptica. Some of the favorites so far are Glory of a Countrywide Rampage, Glory of Wimpy Routed Carnage, and Glory of Tawdry Orange Pumice. In the Glory of department though, Glory of a Dreamy Wagon Picture reigns supreme.

"Perhaps this is what they're after" says Krill, Minister of Paranormal 19th Century Transport, while pointing to a manila folder full of photographs. "We took this shot NW of Elipolis some months back. We were looking for a haunted conestoga in the area, but the sunset was kinda pretty don't you think? Given the focus of the invasion so far, this could be the answer to the question 'why'. The only thing to answer now is, is this wagon some artifact of great power that the nation of NGoWD requires for rituals to end the world?"

"We certainly hope not!" was the opinion voiced by most.


A picture of the supposed Dreamy Wagon.

There is some division in the cabinet though. As Chief Justice asleepathewheel see's it, "Keeping Glory of intact is an underhanded way to anagram in my book." He points to Gory Import of a Nuclear Wedgy as the most likely anagram to fit the current situation. "Sure Glory of Warped Country Image fits in some people's minds, and Madcap Glory of Weiner Yogurt is funny the first few times you hear it, but we need to keep the purity of anagrams as our primary objective. Just as our Founding Fathers spelled out in the constitution."

Hard to argue with that!

[Master Zen]

Ah, I think the confusion regarding our new acronym is that I forgot to add the apostrophe. Hence in practice it would actually be written as...

u

gOt

NGoW'd!!!

[vondrack]

ROFLMAO.

Great stuff, Aeson!

[Beta]

Indeed...

(You can certainly tell a civilization is advanced when it has a Minister of Acroynms and Anagrams. )

[Cort Haus]

Great work, Aeson. Is that a nuke in that wagon photo or is a parasol just pleased to see somebody ...

[Master Zen]

It's a WMD in the making...

[Aeson]

Forcast Fine for Foreseeable Future
Five-thousand year trend of dismal weather finally breaks.

Naught, GS (OrangeNews) - Damn!

[Krill]

forecast has an "e" in it, Aeson...