PRAVDA: October 1942 Issue

[Iron Chancellor]

I think there is a cover-up in action, perpetrated by those counter-revolutionaries and reactionaries.

Thus, I say, PURGE!

[curtsibling]

KURT SIBLINGOV PROVIDES TODAY'S FACTORY HUMOUR

To raise war-time spirits, we in the Industrial and armament departments have gathered all
the most cheerful jokes that our brave workers are telling in their 1 minute daily lunch-break!

All troops are permitted one laugh per joke.


Two army rules:
#1.The commanding officer is always right.
#2.If the commanding officer is not right, see #1.


A soldier is being led to the place of his execution.
-Some bad weather we`re having,-he says to his convoy.
-Look who`s complaining, they say, we have to go back.


An ensign is walking along the street, wearing different colored shoes - one's black, and the other one's brown. A major stops him and says:
-Ensign! Go home and change your shoes.
-I can't, major, says ensign, the ones I've got at home are just like the ones I'm wearing.


A recruit examines the food served to him in the batallion dining room.
- Do I have any choice here, he asks a sergeant.
- Yes, you do. You may eat it or not.


A soldier keeps a mug upside down and tells the sergeant:
- I can't drink from this mug. It has no opening.
The sergeant examines the mug and says:
- You are right. And besides this, it has no bottom.


- Sergeant, what should I do if my parachute won't open?
- Bring it back and I'll replace it.


Comrades, more worker wisecracks will follow soon!

Note to all citizens: Failure to laugh will be investigated by the NKVD.

[The ANZAC]

haha! oh...I meant...ha!...errr....oh no, please forgive me

[Dr. Nick]

[curtsibling]

Comrade El Awrence,

A fine issue of Pravda...All workers should make sure they have a copy!

[Shaka Naldur]

I've found the jokes funny

[curtsibling]

Keep laughing, comrade...Keep laughing!

[Dr. Nick]

Luftwaffe Bombs Information Ministry, Pravda Suspended

Moscow.- Hundreds of fascist planes dropped a thousand bombs yesterday on the information ministry inside the Kremlin. Propaganda Minister Awrensky was seen crawling out of the rubble shouting, disconsolately "My motherboard! My precious motherboard! The people will be avenged!" and was rushed to hospital. Reports say that the information machinery of the Soviet Union is still being comprised, but that a new motherboard must be ordered from our capitalist allies, which, despite the speedy recovery of our Comissar of Information and Propaganda, will delay the return of Pravda. As such, Pravda has been suspended until the a new one can be brought from England via Murmansk. Hopefully the motherboard will be safe from prowling fascist submarines and shall reach the Kremlin so that that People may once again be informed.

NOTE: My motherboard died a sudden death last Friday. I am trying to get a new one, but I need to scrape the bottom of the piggy bank. I hope to be back before the end of the week.

[Colwyn]

War humor

- Heard the latest about Hitler,

Apparently he lost a testical when he was young getting a head with a goat.

his new body doubles are not amused.


- A russian soldier who refused to surrender is finally captured when concused by a grenade blast. His german interigators want to know why the russians are fighting so hard for stalin who they exclaim is a tyrant.

The russian calmly replies that given a choice b/w serving stalin or hitler he would prefer to serve the dictator that at least spoke russian.

[Colwyn]

WHere is Pravda #4

The troops are clammering for official news!

[conmcb25]

Re: WHere is Pravda #4

Originally posted by Colwyn
The troops are clammering for official news!

Yes we are I miss the good old days when we could read high quality propoganda all the time!

[Dr. Nick]

Pravda is working ever so hard to meet the demands of the workers.

More Pravda will print tonight! All hail the power of the proletariat!

[Dr. Nick]

BTW, call me Comrade Alsahafsky.

[conmcb25]

I wonder if Comrade Alsahafsky could do Pravda from the Gulag?

After all we were promised a report from the Front 2 DAYS AGO!

Comrade Alsahafsky

[Dr. Nick]

Forgive me, Comrade Marshall, for I have dispatched all those reporters from Pravda to fight for the Rodina and I have remained alone to run the paper of the Party! News is forthcoming, from all fronts!