Secret Police Recruitment

[Hercules]

Secret Police Recruitment


Members wanted to join secret police. Good rates of ecs, Nice work,Lots of free time. Help influence the development of the police state. Bonuses. Career prospects. Vacation/Holidays. ehh Retirement plan

Skill requirements.

Skill with recycling plant mechanics. Firearms ability 'Gun' at minimum, training given. Ability to bug rooms, telephones etc but training given to suitable candidates. Ability to be discreet. Lurkers welcome. Some familiarity with various torture techniques desirable and nerve stapling ability essential.

Enthusiam to seek out anti leadership elements.

If interested send PM or email.

Do Not post your interest in this thread for obvious reasons.

[Jamski]

Could I be the friendly public face of the secret police, and deny that there were any nervestaplings occurring on the night of the 25th and anyway noone was there to hear the screams and I didn't say that, and you'll keep your mouth shut if you know what's good for you, I know where your children go to school, I know everything about you, that is to say, that I would know everything about you IF there was such a thing as a secret police but obviously there's not is there, I hope you have a nice day Comrade, don't stand too near any machinery now...

-Jam

[jtsisyoda]

Seeing how every citizen should be on the lookout for unhiverian actions, aren't we all part of the police force? Why does it have to be secret? Doesn't everybody know by now that family members have an obligation to report them if they stray from the Hive doctrine?

[Hercules]

Can I just report we have been inundated with applications that it has been a quite day at the office, if we had an office.

And yes Comrade jtsisyoda of course you can send in your reports or just talk to the lampshade in the loo if you find it easier.

Comrade Jamski, Yes you are right we do need that friendly public face.
Heh I remember your famed treatment of the former Hiverian Frankychin in the HQ laundrymat washing machine. They don't call you a spin doctor for nothing.

[Jamski]

Heh, Frankychan certainly cleaned up his act, eh? You'd be surprised what can come out in the wash.

-Jam

[Hercules]

And then he gave us a clean pair of heels

[Hercules]

I am sure you (addressing new Secret police recruits) are all familar with the workings of the recycling tank, but just in case you haven't 'disappeared' someone for a while, here is the starting procedure from the manual.

" You put the right foot in, the right foot out, the right foot in and you shake it all about...................". you may sing if conditions permit.

Another lesson tomorrow.

Don't forget to report unhiverian activity from family members, its your contribution.

[Hercules]

Report to Chairman and General secretary:

Comrades we have compiled information on close to 70% of the population and have their DNA profiles. Obviously there is still work to do. Recent advances have resulted in the arrest of some comrades for 'errors' prior to their being part of this Chiron adventure.

[jtsisyoda]

Greetings from your friendly neighborhood shameless narc not very secret policeman. Just following up on a report I delivered to the lampshade, regarding my mother and her unhiverian attitude this morning. Has she been picked up from the coffee shop as I suggested? Otherwise she'll be back soon and she might make me do chores instead of searching the neighbor's house for copies of a rumored underground newspaper babysitting the neighbor's kids.

[Hercules]

Special undercover patrol on way to coffee shop. Btw what she look like so as we don't pick up the wrong mother.

[Maniac]

Report to Chairman and General secretary:

Thanks for the update Director! Your efforts will be rewarded by a gunshot in the head by a seat in the Politburo!

[jtsisyoda]

Herc, your goons will know my mother by the silver bracelet I gave her last mother's day. It's quite striking, actually. Can't miss it.

[GeneralTacticus]

Originally posted by Hercules
Report to Chairman and General secretary:

Comrades we have compiled information on close to 70% of the population and have their DNA profiles. Obviously there is still work to do. Recent advances have resulted in the arrest of some comrades for 'errors' prior to their being part of this Chiron adventure.

Good job. Keep working on it; we need police files on every citizen in the Hive.

[Phenix]

When we research Information (or maybe Planetary will be needed) Networks, I propose beginning the construction of a total network of secutirty cameras and microphones reaching the entire Hiverian faction.

[Vander]

We already heard this idea. You were talking about it with your wife this morning.....
You forgot to use the outer fork first, by the way...