Announcement

**Nell_Smith** · May 1, 1999, 00:56

================================================== ==================
UNIVERSITY OF PLANET CONFIDENTIAL INTERNAL COMMUNICATION
Message Status: Encrypted
Access Level: Restricted
Signatory: *not known*
================================================== ==================

I told the Provost, I warned her, but did she listen? Stupid question, I mean, when does she ever listen? See, I told you... set up a network, I said, and you're setting up a beacon for every cursed spy on the face of Planet! Why not just invite them to a party and give them your most confidential research data as a leaving present? But did she listen? Oh no, she knew best, she knew that nobody would be so lowdown as to send in spies against us... and now look! It's on PBC Nightly News! How long before they come for us as well? I'm telling you, we're not safe, we gotta shut down the Net Node... omigod... I'm transmitting on the open channel... what was that noise? ... hello?... respond.... I'm... losing.... transmission... can't clear screen... losing...
*error*
*message terminated*
*resetting authorisation code*
*ends*

**Nell_Smith** · May 1, 1999, 01:18

================================================== ==================
UNIVERSITY OF PLANET AUTHORISED INTER-FACTION COMMUNICATION
Message Status: Decrypted
Access Level: Open
Signatory: NS, Provost
================================================== ==================
Due to a regrettable resignation, a vacancy has arisen for a Senior Network Node Adminstrator at University Base.

Applicants are invited from any suitably skilled persons. Must be conversant with advanced encryption techniques and must also be able to maintain confidentiality.

Very important note: Previous applicants (and especially previous incumbents) need not apply.

Note: The UoP is NOT an equal opportunity employer. Preference will be given to applicants with an IQ rating over 160.

Applications in writing please to:
Provost Nell
University Base
University of Planet

*ends*

[This message has been edited by Nell_Smith (edited May 01, 1999).]

**Goob** · May 6, 1999, 17:08

Today on PBC news...
Spartan Rovers have been seen roving...
Gaian treehuggers were seen examining knot holes for squirrels...
True Believers are reportedly drinking wine from little cups and eating wafers in some sort of frenzy....
There are unconfirmed reports of Chairman Yang talking with Spartan Models about the "virtues of his particular 'social structure'"....
The university's Provost is considering augentation surgery...
Morgan Industries declares this the week of the Sweat Shop Worker and allows all underage employees to have an extra 5 mintes added to their personal time.
Finally Brother Lal has been heard asking new female residents "What is your Talent?"

Film at Eleven...

**cousLee** · May 6, 1999, 20:07

AYE, AnD a goOD WiNe iT Is. eRm, waS. MorGan IndUstRies, RegREts thE ShOrT ShiPMenT

FuLl CRedIt WilL BE givEn fOR Da MisSing CCasE.

[This message has been edited by cousLee (edited May 06, 1999).]

**Goob** · May 12, 1999, 14:46

Aredhran posted 05-12-99 12:43 PM ET
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chiron News Network Update
-------------------------
Pact of Brotherhood signed at Sunny Mesa Today !

It's on a beautiful day of MY 2158 that Gaia's Stepchildren, represented by their leader, Lord Aredhran, and the Lord's Believers High Priese, Shepherd MoSe, met at the top of the landmark known as the Sunny Mesa to sign a formal Pact of Brotherhood.

This comes as a happy conclusion to a situation that could easily have degenerated into a bloody war, as the Believers, finding themselves in extremely tight quarters, expanded by founding a new Church that ended up splitting Gaian territory in two.

The Gaian leader promptly responded by demanding the removal of this church, or it would be destroyed by his pet Mindworms. Long diplomatic talk followed, as most people know, and it ended up with the Believers promising to leave the snatched land to the hands of their previous owners, as soon as a suitable new Church site is discovered.

The two leaders had an excellent contact with each other, and both showed their good will by stepping down from their original demands, unwilling to begin a war that would be detrimental to both factions, and came to an agreement.

Lord Aredhran said "A Pact of Brotherhood between our two nations would undoubtedly strenghten us both, and thus I hope that your prayers to your Lord will enlighten you to the wisdom of my offer", to what the noble Shepherd of the Believers replied "Le vie del Signore sono infinite", meaning that he would follow the mysterious ways of his Lord.

A National Holiday was held at Gaia's Landing and other cities in Gaian territory to celebrate the event. Both leaders separated with the promise to keep up the good diplomatic relationship, and the hopes of a long-lasting friendship between the two nations.

Goobmeister posted 05-12-99 02:11 PM ET
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scene: a lonely cross-road near the newest True Lord's Believers Cathedral/Outpost.
A Gaian Environmental Services Rover is pulled slightly of the beacon marked road. One Believer Personal Two-Wheeled Transport is propped up against an old fungal bloom, while another lies crumpled on the ground, apparently having been hit by the Gaian rover.

The driver of the Rover, a young man in the traditional Gaian purple and green jumpsuit is arguing with the two Believers who are wearing the missionaries dark pants and orange jacket.

-- "Dude, it is not my fault, you two came out of nowhere out of Fungus."

-- "Honored sir, if you had not been driving so fast you certainly would have seen us, we were clearly had the right of way."

-- "You were speeding like freakin' Peacekeepers trying to get out of the Fungus! Had you stopped at all, then nothing would have happened."

The two believers looked back to their road coming around the fungal patch, their faces pailing some what.

-- "Unlike you honorable Worm-Tamers we really don't like being near the fungus. It is not a holy place."
-- "Amen brother", the junior Believer breathed quietly.

-- "If you didn't travel in those stupid mo-peds there wouldn't be anything to worry about. Or carry one of these..." The Gaian reaches inside his Rover, the scent of some recently burned herb wafting out, and pulled out a Mark IV Burner. "These are top of the line to hold off the wild worms that won't listen to reason."

At the thought of any Worm listening to reason the two believers crossed themselves.

-- "The only thing harder than getting a bloody Mindworm to listen to reason is to get a Nature freak to listen to some..."

-- "I'll toast you right here, dude..."

-- "Quiet you two, this would be a good time to pray for our Lord's intercession and wisdom."

-- "I am not praying to your Lord, I walk with Planet..."

-- "And the Lord walks with you at the same time."

-- "Your Lord is dead and Planet is alive!"

-- "Our Lord breathes through your breath as well as mine, and when you stop breathing, the Lord will continue to breathe on."

-- "Dude, if I weren't so high right now I'd take your stupid "bike" and smash on your head."

-- "I have a question," the Junior member interjected, "when you're banging one of your tree hugging earth muffins does she yell 'OH Planet!' or 'Oh Mindworm'? Or does she not really yell at all because you can't get it up because your high?"

-- "You son of a... At least I'm not waggin' my willy at an Orange Orangutang!"

As the argument festered and heated, all three failed to hear the sensor warning of the local beacon, and the corresponding flashing light in the Gaian Rover.

Thus, as the Boil burst out of the fungus, annoyed by the petty arguments and hatred brewing among the three so close to its home, the Gaian and his trusty Mark IV Burner were not quick enough to fend off the Worm, though he was able to toast the Believers in an apparent effort to end their suffering before the worms burrowed into his brain...

PLanet

M.Y. 2108, sometime late spring.

**MariOne** · June 20, 1999, 14:45

^

**Aredhran** · June 27, 1999, 10:17

Save from oblivion !

**PhatLady** · June 29, 1999, 02:03

************************************
SPARTAN GENERAL BROADCAST 2164
************************************

The Spartan Federation mourns the loss of the ever vigilant Colonel Bene, the 4th. He served his people with distinction and honor. A monument has been erected at the Federation Command Center where his body will be on display for three days. Following the time of public mourning the body will be incinerated, as is our practice, and the urn containing our beloved colonel's ashes will be encased in the base of the monument.

**PhatLady** · June 29, 1999, 02:42

******************************************
SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT
******************************************
SPARTAN GENERL BROADCAST 2164
******************************************

A new leader has been announced by the Spartan Federation High Council. General PhatLady will be our new glorious leader. Her rise in military power and rank has been noted by many. Starting her career as a Spartan Model she became well trained in undercover work and ranked expert marksman with the latest weapons. She continued her training with the Spartan Specials where she excelled in commando training. Most recently she has been part of our forces at Zena's Landing. It is there that she was promoted from colonel to general and given the news of her selection as Spartan Leader. Her first public announcemnt as Spartan Leader is expected after the time of public mourning for Colonel Bene has concluded.

[This message has been edited by PhatLady (edited June 29, 1999).]

**cousLee** · June 30, 1999, 05:59

Morgan Speedy Florist has sent several arrangements to Sparta Command for their mourning services, free of charge. The Fungal Bloom arrangements were much appreciated.

**Goob** · June 30, 1999, 14:20

Please post all story entries in the Firaxian MP Forum IN the Goobfest thread.

Mark G you can close this thread.

Announcement

Goob Challenge: All the Propoganda that's Fit to Print!

Goob Challenge: All the Propoganda that's Fit to Print!

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment