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  • CNN Issue 11

    Chironian News Network Issue 11



    CNN Relaunched - Again
    By GeneralTacticus


    Approximately 50 years after CNN Chief Editor Tassadar5000 announced the relaunching of the CNN and then vanished without a trace, Commissioner General Tacticus announced plans to relaunch the CNN for the third time, opening an editor’s office and asking for articles to be sent in. Unfortunately, none were for several days, causing the release of the first new issue to be delayed until after the last cabinet meeting. It should be emphasised that the CNN depends upon at least some level of reader input, and that any articles that citizens care to send are welcome.

    Cabinet Meeting Ends in Fiasco: Hive Blamed
    By GeneralTacticus


    The third Cabinet meeting of UN government term VI ended in a fiasco today, as Commissioner General Tacticus suddenly lost contact with the other directors, leaving them hanging for some time before they declared the meeting over and left. Several directors joked about it immediately afterwards, believing that this was the result of a minor computer glitch which would soon be repaired, o an accidental action by one of the directors. Soon, however, it became apparent that this was not the case, and the meeting broke up.

    The Commissioner’s staff attributed the event to an attack on the communications system by a Hive probe team, which took quite a while to resolve. Chastened security forces announced that they would upgrade their presence around communication networks during future cabinet meetings.

    Free Market Implemented, Economy Skyrockets
    By GeneralTacticus


    In MY 2242, after three separate polls on this extremely divisive issue and a number of accusations of anti-democratic tactics made against DSE Pandemoniak (which resulted in the passage of an amendment), the UN public voted to approve the Free Market as official Peacekeeping economic policy, much to the relief of CEO Morgan, and causing celebrations among the DLP and assorted other FM supporters. DSE Pandemoniak reluctantly gave the order to switch and then spent several days getting drunk on Talisker whiskey, supplied to him for free by Akiria governor Cedayon, presumably out of sympathy.

    In the 15 years since then, the UN GDP has grown from 196 ECs per annum to 481 ECs per annum, a total growth of 9.7% per year. Substantial government spending on welfare, recreation, and education has also induced intellectual Golden Ages in a number of bases, and completely eliminated Drones from a number of bases.

    This situation may prove less than permanent, however, as Pandemonium mayor Pandemoniak announced plans to reintroduce a Planned economy into his base, rasing the question of whether this experiment may spread. However, given that the other four UN regions are governed by officials known to be either partly or fully in support of the Free Market, this is unlikely without a policy change on the part of the Social Engineering Directorate.
    Applied Relativity Developed; Plan Supercollider Implemented
    By GeneralTacticus


    Before the premature end of the latest cabinet meeting, government policy in Jedinica Vrijstaat underwent an abrupt change when an Alien Artefact found in the fungal fields north of the border was linked up to the Network Node in Sheathed Sword, revealing to shocked scientists a theory of Applied Relativity that has eluded the determined efforts of several private research teams for years. Governor Maniac immediately ordered the restructuring of the region’s build priorities to allow a massive Supercollider to be built in Concordia in record time. Although this was cut short by other events, and will now have to be polled due to the soon-to-be-passed Maniac Reforms, it will likely be approved anyway and will make Concordia the scientific powerhouse of the UN and indeed the entire planet, accelerating our research even further.

    Neural Grafting Developed
    By GeneralTacticus


    A second technological discovery (this time by more conventional means) took place this year: that of the technique of Neural Grafting. News of it’s development was greeted with jubilation by the military, who can now finally use cybernetic technology to create multi-skilled troops, and who will also soon receive the related technology of Bioengineering, which will allow for power sources and other pieces of equipment so efficient that the support necessary for the military will be almost nil. Neural Grafting will also permit the construction of a Neural Amplifier, which will give troops an edge against Mindworms when defending against them.

    Hive Unrest Continues; Experts Blame Economic Collapse
    By GeneralTacticus


    Civil unrest has seemingly become a constant in the underground warrens of the Human Hive and the wide streets of the occupied University bases. The death toll as Yang’s security forces have repeatedly opened fire on demonstrators is believed to run into the tens of thousands, and the unrest is causing a great deal of disruption to a state which is forced to reduce output from an already shaky industrial base to free up workers for security duties, although the number of riots has somewhat declined recently.

    This internal conflict is largely a result of the economic crisis which Yang’s totalitarian state has been plunged into by its conquest of the University and the continuing maintenance of a war economy. The energy expended on maintaining expensive, almost useless facilities captured from the University is a major contributor to the Hive’s massive budget deficit, which currently stand at 60% of GDP, and has forced Yang to shut down the small welfare program that had previously provided at least some modicum of comfort for the majority of the Hive population.

    Economists predict that, due to these huge expenditures, the Hive economy will completely implode within ten years, probably less, and force the very facilities which are required to pacify the Hive population to be shut down. This knowledge appears to be contributing greatly to a siege mentality on the part of the Hive elite, many of whom have been building private fortresses for defence against a major internal revolt. It remains to be seen whether the Hive people can defeat their rulers, but regardless of this, there is going to be a great deal of blood in the streets of the Hive before it is over.

  • #2
    Re: CNN Issue 11

    Governor Maniac immediately ordered the restructuring of the region’s build priorities to allow a massive Supercollider to be built in Concordia in record time. Although this was cut short by other events, and will now have to be polled due to the soon-to-be-passed Maniac Reforms,
    The irony.
    Contraria sunt Complementa. -- Niels Bohr
    Mods: SMAniaC (SMAC) & Planetfall (Civ4)

    Comment


    • #3
      What's the irony? The amendment hadn't passed when I psoted this.

      Comment


      • #4
        The irony is that I have to poll my preferred SP due to the reforms I myself proposed, with the risk of not being allowed to build it. Am I the only one who saw this in that fragment?
        Contraria sunt Complementa. -- Niels Bohr
        Mods: SMAniaC (SMAC) & Planetfall (Civ4)

        Comment


        • #5
          I see it now

          Comment


          • #6
            Sweet, but where's the horoscope page?

            *Starts looking into the sky in preparation for the next issue*

            -Jam
            1) The crappy metaspam is an affront to the true manner of the artform. - Dauphin
            That's like trying to overninja a ninja when you aren't a mammal. CAN'T BE DONE. - Kassi on doublecrossing Ljube-ljcvetko
            Check out the ALL NEW Galactic Overlord Website for v2.0 and the Napoleonic Overlord Website or even the Galactic Captians Website Thanks Geocities!
            Taht 'ventisular link be woo to clyck.

            Comment


            • #7
              You're welcome to submit one if you like.

              Comment


              • #8
                You have to give me a deadline, if you're an editor
                Haven't you seen any newspaper movies?

                -Jam
                1) The crappy metaspam is an affront to the true manner of the artform. - Dauphin
                That's like trying to overninja a ninja when you aren't a mammal. CAN'T BE DONE. - Kassi on doublecrossing Ljube-ljcvetko
                Check out the ALL NEW Galactic Overlord Website for v2.0 and the Napoleonic Overlord Website or even the Galactic Captians Website Thanks Geocities!
                Taht 'ventisular link be woo to clyck.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I did give a deadline; check the Editor's office.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by War of Art
                    Sweet, but where's the horoscope page?

                    *Starts looking into the sky in preparation for the next issue*

                    -Jam
                    Great idea !
                    Occidental Zodiac or Chinese one ?
                    "Just because you're paranoid doesnt mean there's not someone following me..."
                    "I shall return and I shall be billions"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Great stuff, GT! Here's hoping you don't fall prey to the CNN editors curse.
                      "The number of political murders was a little under one million (800,000 - 900,000)." - chegitz guevara on the history of the USSR.
                      "I think the real figures probably are about a million or less." - David Irving on the number of Holocaust victims.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Occidental, but of course with the effects of two suns and 3 moons ! I'd better get my thinking hat on.

                        -Jam
                        1) The crappy metaspam is an affront to the true manner of the artform. - Dauphin
                        That's like trying to overninja a ninja when you aren't a mammal. CAN'T BE DONE. - Kassi on doublecrossing Ljube-ljcvetko
                        Check out the ALL NEW Galactic Overlord Website for v2.0 and the Napoleonic Overlord Website or even the Galactic Captians Website Thanks Geocities!
                        Taht 'ventisular link be woo to clyck.

                        Comment

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