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In the spring of 1992-
it was around Easter as I recall- an extraordinary phenomenon occurred in
my life. God began talking with you. Through me. Let me explain.
I was very unhappy
during that period, personally, professionally, and emotionally, and my
life was feeling like a failure on all levels. As I'd been in the habit
for years of writing my thoughts down in letters (which I usually never
delivered), I picked up my trusty yellow legal pad and began pouring out
my feelings. This time, rather than
another letter to another person I imagined to be victimizing me, I
thought I'd go straight to the source; straight to the greatest victimizer
of them all. I decided to write a letter to God. It was a spiteful,
passionate letter, full of confusions, contortions, and condemnations. And
a pile of angry questions. Why wasn't my life
working? What would it take to get it to work? Why could I
not find happiness in relationships? Was the experience of adequate money
going to elude me forever? Finally- and most emphatically- What had I
done to deserve a life of such continuing struggle?
To my surprise, as I
scribbled out the last of my bitter, unanswerable questions and prepared
to toss my pen aside, my hand remained poised over the paper, as if held
there by some invisible force. Abruptly, the pen began moving on its
own. I had no idea what I was about to write, but an idea
seemed to be coming, so I decided to flow with it. Out came...
Do
you really want an answer to all these questions, or are you just venting?
Both. I'm venting,
sure, but if these questions have answers, I'd sure as hell like to hear
them! You
are "sure as hell". . about a lot of things. But wouldn't it be nice to be
"sure as Heaven"? And I wrote:
What is that supposed
to mean? Before I knew it, I
had begun a conversation ... and I was not writing so much as taking
dictation. That dictation went on
for three years, and at the time, I had no idea where it was going. The
answers to the questions I was putting on paper never came to me until the
question was completely written and I'd put my own thoughts away.
Often the answers came faster than I could write, and I found
myself scribbling to keep up. When I became confused, or lost the feeling
that the words were coming from somewhere else, I put the pen down and
walked away from the dialogue until I again felt inspired- sorry, that's
the only word which truly fits- to return to the yellow legal pad and
start transcribing again. These conversations
are still going on as I write this. And much of it is found on the pages
which follow ... pages which contain an astounding dialogue which at first
I disbelieved, then assumed to be of personal value, but which I now
understand was meant for more than just me. It was meant for you and
everyone else who has come to this material. For my questions are your
questions. I want you to get into
this dialogue as soon as you can, because what's really important here is
not my story, but yours. It is your life story which brought
you here. It is your personal experience to which this material has
relevance. Otherwise you would not be here, with it, right now.
So let's enter the
dialogue with a question I had been asking for a very long time: How does
God talk, and to whom? When I asked this question, here's the answer I
received: I
talk to everyone. All the time. The question is not to whom do I talk, but
who listens? Intrigued, I asked God
to expand on this subject. Here's what God said: First,
let's exchange the word talk with the word communicate. It's a much
better word, a much fuller, more accurate one. When we try to speak to
each other- Me to you, you to Me, we are immediately constricted by the
unbelievable limitation of words. For this reason, I do not communicate by
words alone. In fact, rarely do I do so. My most common form of
communication is through feeling. Feeling
is the language of the soul. If you want to know what's true for you about
something, look to how you're feeling about it. Feelings
are sometimes difficult to discover- and often even more difficult to
acknowledge. Yet hidden in your deepest feelings is your highest truth.
The
trick is to get to those feelings. I will show you how. Again. If you
wish.
I told God that I did
wish, but that right now I wished even more for a complete and full answer
to my first question. Here's what God said: I
also communicate with thought. Thought and feelings are not the
same, although they can occur at the same time. In communicating with
thought, I often use images and pictures. For this reason, thoughts are
more effective than mere words as tools of communcation. In
addition to feelings and thoughts, I also use the vehicle of experience
as a grand communicator. And
finally, when feelings and thoughts and experience all fail, I use words.
Words are really the least effective communicator. They are most open to
misinterpretation,
most often misunderstood. And why is that? It is because of what words
are. Words are merely utterances: noises that stand for
feelings, thoughts, and experience. They are symbols. Signs.
Insignias. They are not Truth. They are not the real thing.
Words
may help you understand something. Experience allows you to know. Yet
there are some things you cannot experience. So I have given you other
tools of knowing. And these are called feelings. And so too, thoughts.
Now
the supreme irony here is that you have all placed so much importance on
the Word of God, and so little on the experience.
In
fact, you place so little value on experience that when what you
experience of God differs from what you've heard of God, you
automatically discard the experience and own the words, when it
should be just the other way around. Your
experience and your feelings about a thing represent what you factually
and intuitively know about that thing. Words can only seek to symbolize
what you know, and can often confuse what you know.
These,
then, are the tools with which I communicate, yet they are not the
methods, for not all feelings, not all thoughts, not all experience, and
not all words are from Me. Many
words have been uttered by others, in My name. Many thoughts and many
feelings have been sponsored by causes not of My direct creation. Many
experiences result from these. The
challenge is one of discernment. The difficulty is knowing the difference
between messages from God and data from other sources. Discrimination is a
simple matter with the application of a basic rule: Mine
is always your Highest Thought, your Clearest Word, your Grandest Feeling.
Anything less is from another source. Now
the task of differentiation becomes easy, for it should not be difficult
even for the beginning student to identify the Highest, the Clearest, and
the Grandest. Yet
will I give you these guidelines: The
Highest Thought is always that thought which contains joy. The Clearest
Words are those words which contain truth. The Grandest Feeling is that
feeling which you call love. Joy,
truth, love. These three are interchangeable, and one always leads to the
other. It matters not in which order they are placed.
Having
with these guidelines determined which messages are Mine and which have
come from another source, the only question remaining is whether My
messages will be heeded. Most
of My messages are not. Some, because they seem too good to be true.
Others, because they seem too difficult to follow. Many, because they are
simply misunderstood. Most, because they are not received.
My
most powerful messenger is experience, and even this you ignore.
Especially this you ignore. Your
world would not be in its present condition were you to have simply
listened to your experience. The result of your not listening to your
experience is that you keep re-living it, over and over again. For My
purpose will not be thwarted, nor My will be ignored. You will get
the message. Sooner or later. I
will not force you to, however. I will never coerce you. For I have given
you a free will- the power to do as you choose- and I will never take that
away from you, ever. And
so I will continue sending you the same messages over and over again,
throughout the millennia and to whatever corner of the universe you
occupy. Endlessly will I send you My messages, until you have received
them and held them close, calling them your own. My
messages will come in a hundred forms, at a thousand moments, across a
million years. You cannot miss them if you truly listen. You cannot ignore
them once truly heard. Thus will our communication begin in earnest. For
in the past you have only talked to Me, praying to Me, interceding
with Me, beseeching Me. Yet now can I talk back to you, even as I
am doing here. How can I know this
communication is from God? How do know this is not my own imagination?
What
would be the difference? Do
you not see that I could just as easily work through your imagination as
anything else? I will bring you the exact right thoughts, words or
feelings, at any given moment, suited precisely to the purpose at hand,
using one device, or several. You
will know these words are from Me because you, of your own accord, have
never spoken so clearly. Had you already spoken so clearly on these
questions, you would not be asking them. To whom does God
communicate? Are there special people? Are there special times?
All
people are special, and all moments are golden. There is no person and
there is no time one more special than another. Many people choose to
believe that God communicates in special ways and only with special
people. This removes the mass of the people from responsibility for
hearing My message, much less receiving it (which is another
matter), and allows them to take someone else's word for everything. You
don't have to listen to Me, for you've already decided that others
have heard from Me on every subject, and you have them to listen
to. By
listening to what other people think they heard Me say, you don't have to
think at all. This
is the biggest reason for most people turning from My messages on a
personal level. If you acknowledge that you are receiving My messages
directly, then you are responsible for interpreting them. It is far safer
and much easier to accept the interpretation of others (even others who
have lived 2,000 years ago) than seek to interpret the message you may
very well be receiving in this moment now. Yet
I invite you to a new form of communication with God. A two-way
communication. In truth, it is you who have invited Me. For I have come to
you, in this form, right now, in answer to your call.
Why do some people,
take Christ, for example, seem to hear more of Your communication than
others? Because
some people are willing to actually listen. They are willing to hear, and
they are willing to remain open to the communication even when it
seems scary, or crazy, or downright wrong. We should listen to
God even when what's being said seems wrong? Especially
when it seems wrong. If you think you are right about everything, who
needs to talk with God? Go
ahead and act on all that you know. But notice that you've all been doing
that since time began. And look at what shape the world is in. Clearly,
you've missed something. Obviously, there is something you don't
understand. That which you do understand must seem right to you, because
"right" is a term you use to designate something with which you agree.
What you've missed will, therefore, appear at first to be
"wrong." The
only way to move forward on this is to ask yourself, "What would happen if
everything I thought was 'wrong' was actually 'right'?" Every great
scientist knows about this. When what a scientist does is not working, a
scientist sets aside all of the assumptions and starts over. All great
discoveries have been made from a willingness, and ability, to not be
right. And that's what's needed here. You
cannot know God until you've stopped telling yourself that you already
know God. You cannot hear God until you stop thinking that you've already
heard God. I
cannot tell you My Truth until you stop telling Me yours.
But my truth about God
comes from You. Who
said so? Others.
What
others? Leaders. Ministers.
Rabbis. Priests. Books. The Bible, for heaven's sake!
Those
are not authoritative sources. They aren't?
No.
Then what is?
Listen
to your feelings. Listen to your Highest Thoughts. Listen to your
experience. Whenever any one of these differ from what you've been told by
your teachers, or read in your books, forget the words. Words are the
least reliable purveyor of Truth. There is so much I
want to say to You, so much I want to ask. I don't know where to
begin. For instance, why is
it that You do not reveal Yourself? If there really is a God, and You are
It, why do You not reveal Yourself in a way we can all understand?
I have done so, over and
over. I arn doing so again right now. No. I mean by a method
of revelation that is incontrovertible; that cannot be denied.
Such
as? Such as appearing
right now before my eyes. I
am
doing so right now. Where?
Everywhere
you look. No, I mean in an
incontrovertible way. In a way no man could deny. What
way would that be? In what form or shape would you have Me appear?
In the form or shape
that you actually have. That
would be impossible, for I have no form or shape you understand. I could
adopt a form or shape that you could understand, but then everyone would
assume that what they have seen is the one and only form and shape of God,
rather than a form or shape of God- one of many. People
believe I am what they see Me as, rather than what they do not see. But I
am the Great Unseen, not what I cause Myself to be in any particular
moment. In a sense, I am what I am not. It is from the
am-notness that I come, and to it I always return. Yet when I come
in one particular form or another- a form in which I think people can
understand Me- people assign Me that form forevermore.
And
should I come in any other form, to any other people, the first say I did
not appear to the second, because I did not look to the second as I did to
the first, nor say the same things- so how could it have been Me?
You
see, then, it matters not in what form or in what manner I reveal Myself-
whatever manner I choose and whatever form I take, none
will be incontrovertible. But if You did
something that would evidence the truth of who You are beyond doubt or
question ...
...
there are still those who would say, it is of the devil, or simply
someone's imagination. Or any cause other than Me. If
I revealed myself as God Almighty, King of Heaven and Earth, and moved
mountains to prove it, there are those who would say, "It must have been
Satan.” And
such is as it should be. For God does not reveal Godself to Godself from
or through outward observation, but through inward experience. And when
inward experience has revealed Godself, outward observation is not
necessary. And if outward observation is necessary, inward experience is
not possible. If,
then, revelation is requested, it cannot be had, for the act of asking is
a statement that it is not there; that nothing of God is now being
revealed. Such a statement produces the experience. For your thought about
something is creative, and your word is productive, and your
thought and your word together are magnificently effective in giving birth
to your reality. Therefore shall you experience that God is not now
revealed, for if God were, you would not ask God to be.
Does that mean I
cannot ask for anything I want? Are You saying that praying for something
actually pushes it away from us? This
is a question which has been asked through the Ages- and has been answered
whenever it has been asked. Yet you have not heard the answer, or will not
believe it. The
question is answered again, in today's terms, and today's language,
thusly: You
will not have that for which you ask, nor can you have anything you want.
This is because your very request is a statement of lack, and your saying
you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience- wanting-
in your reality. The
correct prayer is therefore never a prayer of supplication, but a prayer
of gratitude. When
you thank God in advance for that which you choose to experience in
your reality, you, in effect, acknowledge that it is there ... in
effect. Thankfulness is thus the most powerful statement to God; an
affirmation that even before you ask, I have answered.
Therefore
never supplicate. Appreciate. But what if I am
grateful to God in advance for something, and it never shows up? That
could lead to disillusionment and bitterness. Gratitude
cannot be used as a tool with which to manipulate God; a
device with which to fool the universe. You cannot lie to yourself.
Your mind knows the truth of your thoughts. If you are saying "Thank you,
God, for such and such," all the while being very clear that it isn't
there in your present reality, you can't expect God to be less
clear than you, and so produce it for you. God
knows what you know, and what you know is what appears as your
reality. But how then can I be
truly grateful for something I know is not there?
Faith.
If you have but the faith of a mustard seed, you shall move mountains. You
come to know it is there because I said it is there; because I
said that, even before you ask, I shall have answered; because I
said, and have said to you in every conceivable way, through every
teacher you can name, that whatsoever you shall choose, choosing it in My
Name, so shall it be. Yet so many people say
that their prayers have gone unanswered. No
prayer- and a prayer is nothing more than a fervent statement of what
is so- goes unanswered. Every prayer- every thought, every statement,
every feeling- is creative. To the degree that it is fervently held as
truth, to that degree will it be made manifest in your experience.
When
it is said that a prayer has not been answered, what has in actuality
happened is that the most fervently held thought, word, or feeling has
become operative. Yet what you must know- and here is the secret-
is that always it is the thought behind the thought- what might be called
the Sponsoring Thought- that is the controlling thought.
If,
therefore, you beg and supplicate, there seems a much smaller chance that
you will experience what you think you are choosing, because the
Sponsoring Thought behind every supplication is that you do not have
now what you wish. That Sponsoring Thought becomes your reality.
The
only Sponsoring Thought which could override this thought is the thought
held in faith that God will grant whatever is asked, without fail.
Some people have such faith, but very few. The
process of prayer becomes much easier when, rather than having to believe
that God will always say "yes" to every request, one understands
intuitively that the request itself is not necessary. Then the prayer
is a prayer of thanksgiving. It is not a request at all, but a statement
of gratitude for what is so. When you say that a
prayer is a statement of what is so, are you saying that God does nothing;
that everything which happens after a prayer is a result of the
prayer's action? If
you believe that God is some omnipotent being who hears all prayers, says
"yes" to some, "no" to others, and "maybe, but not now" to the rest, you
are mistaken. By what rule of thumb would God decide?
If
you believe that God is the creator and decider of all things in
your life, you are mistaken. God
is the observer, not the creator. And God stands ready to assist
you in living your life, but not in the way you might expect.
It
is not God's function to create, or uncreate, the circumstances or
conditions of your life. God
created you, in the image and likeness of God. You have
created the rest, through the power God has given you. God created the
process of life and life itself as you know it. Yet God gave you free
choice, to do with life as you will. In
this sense, your will for you is God's will for you.
You
are living your life the way you are living your life, and I have no
preference in the matter. I
do not care what you do, and that is hard for you to hear. Yet do
you care what your children do when you send them out to play? Is it a
matter of consequence to you whether they play tag, or hide and seek, or
pretend? No, it is not, because you know they are perfectly safe. You have
placed them in an environment which you consider friendly and very okay.
Of
course, you will always hope that they do not hurt themselves. And if they
do, you will be right there to help them, heal them, allow them to feel
safe again, to be happy again, to go and play again another day. But
whether they choose hide and seek or pretend will not matter to you the
next day, either. You
will tell them, of course, which games are dangerous to play. But you
cannot stop your children from doing dangerous things. Not always. Not
forever. Not in every moment from now until death. it is the wise parent
who knows this. Yet the parent never stops caring about the outcome.
It is this dichotomy- not caring deeply about the process, but caring
deeply about the result- that comes close to describing the dichotomy of
God. Yet
God, in a sense, does not even care about the outcome. Not the ultimate
outcome. This is because the ultimate outcome is assured.
And
this is the second great illusion of man: that the outcome of life is in
doubt. It
is this doubt about ultimate outcome that has created your greatest enemy,
which is fear. For if you doubt outcome, then you must doubt
Creator- you must doubt God. And if you doubt God, you must
live in fear and guilt all your life. If
you doubt God's intentions- and God's ability to produce this ultimate
result- then how can you ever relax? How can you ever truly find
peace? |
Contact: info@kulshreshtha.org |