The supercitizen is victorious again.
Congrats.
What was the final custody agreement?

Totally Pekka (which is a new adjective even better than awesome!)

rah, it was joint custody, I agreed to it. I don't see the benefit in sole custody for myself. I think for the children, it is better that then spend time with their mom. So far the agreement is that the children spend half of the month with her and the other half with me. It's not a weekly thing, it's actually more random, but so far it has worked out well. I'm OK with the agreement myself. In here, it's usually the man who gets to see the kids every other weekend and loses the house. In this case, patience paid off, it's 50/50 and I got the house. My alimony is low, 150 euros a month. I have no problem with that.

I used to feel sorry for people who got divorced... I didn't know much about that situation (bad marriage). It IS a solution. It feels so good to know that I am not married to that woman anymore. NEVER ever. Now I'm making a new will, securing this house and all of my assets to the kids, so that she has no way to get to them, even through the kids. She is OUT!

I just feel this cancer isn't getting back. Just so I can show my ex wife I'm not going anywhere. I'm here to live. Just for the sake of it if nothing else. She laughed at me saying how I was going to die before fall, and how she would get the house and everything because we're married, and widowers pension. Well well... didn't quite turn out that way now did it? Actually, it seems to me the more time goes by, the happier and healthier I'm getting and peopel around me have already noticed it. Lessons to be learned here. Not all women are bad, but some are. ANd some of them are evil. Pure, narcissist, sick, multiple personality disorder type of evil.

Cancer? A shrew of a wife? Is there anything you can't defeat?

Congrats, Pekka. Very happy for you!

Both thumbs up:

Congratulations!

Congrats on being free of that malevolent person and for getting a date with a better person.

Can't get much worse... as a person that is. It's strange, for a self confessed narcissist (she actually did it, wrote it down, too!) she was unbelievably not-smart. She had a plan that I die, then she'll inherit me, get widower's pension, the house, all my assets, with this new man, they'd continue life on their own. Me out of the way.

Well... except she got caught, she was way too obvious. Then she turned full insane, during which divorce was the only way even if there were no other men. Regardless, her ego got in the way of her success. She made a ridiculous proposal for division of assets, which was nothing but ego stuff. I could not care less about those items so I freely said yes to them, but kept all the actually important stuff firmly, like the house for example. And money. Here is an example: in our proposal we said I'd waive all the costs that accumulated from my and my dad's work building the house, i.e. the actual work. Which CAN be billed! The value of that, list price is over 200k. So. In division of assets, that negative 200k is attached to this house. So it's minus 100k for our gross fortune, right? Added all the existing debts for the house and it's like minus 250k more. So... if you calculate that, we're at a minus 450k while the selling price of the house (it is not competed yet, you see) is 400k in this housing market situation, so we're in a sitation where we'd lose money. Except I don't have to sell the house because I can pay for it. Which I will do.

So she wanted... my name and my dad's name, our actual real names, out of the proposal as the builders of the house, because she also contributed and wanted her name added stating she participated in "planinng the house and ordering materials, and taking care of the kids so we can go and build the house"... the hell? Well, no brain, only ego. Easy. We'll remove our names. For such a person, incredibly predictable and easy to maneuver. She completely misses all the points and focuses on raging. I don't believe her lawyer advices this, but her lawyer actually wrote this **** on a paper. That means her lawyer probably told her this is not the best proposal ever, and definitely a losing proposition. She must have demanded it, no lawyer woudl have ever sent such crap.

That's only half of the story, I won't tell the other story until I have officially signed the papers. But there's so much more... like her assets she never bothered to mention. We'll see, at first I didn't want to touch it, now I'm not so sure anymore. She's been a total raging idiot, still wanting me to die. Now that we're divorced, perhaps she might learn a lesson. Maybe, just maybe she pays me. I'll probably use that as a leverage for peace though. She is definitely dangerous. No more talking about this topic. But I am surprised as to the level of intelligence lacking. I'm glad I'm out of the situation now.

Oh, did I say I'll get my driver's license back in a few weeks? Yeah! I mean I have my license for my motorcycle but it'll be few months until I can drive it... with snow and all still here but I've got a car and I can drive it soon. I can go to places I've actually been asking for other people to drive us to places for 6 months now. Long time, lots of great things happening at the moment. Had to wait 6 months but here they are, Christmas all over again.

By the way, I am really thankful of this experience. I got back stronger. I just like it by myself and it seems to me I'm better with women now. I don't know why or even how, I just am. I'm more open. I'm not intimidated easily. There are crazier things out there. It is much easier to say "I'll pass" when I see behavior I don't like. I don't think twice about it.

Also, it is so easy for me to manoeuvre stuff at work because the same people are there, it is now so easy, I know exactly what to say and how far to keep them away from myself. It is so easy. I used to think not to be so... out with it, but when I make a 100 % identification, no praise is enough, it is easy, you want something, you need to give them the right role, make them think you are opening own door by accident because you are an idiot, and they can be the hero, save the day and get all the credit. Just make sure you praise them enough and make it a can't-fail-situation for them. They NEVER say no. And few of them remember and return favour.